#john knowles

The DSM-5 lists 9 symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder, 6 of which can be clearly seen in Gene. Page numbers cited are from where the passages are in my edition of ASP, they may slightly differ in other editions.

Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment

Gene's insecurity, his belief that Finny is superior to him, creates an immense fear that Finny will leave him - he "[does not] know why Finny had chosen [him]" (p. 109), of all people, to be close friends and confidants with. His narration is marred with the belief that if Finny realizes that Gene is not better that him, that he wins even in an imaginary competition of Gene's only creation, he will leave, because why stay?

Of the Super Suicide Society of the Summer Session, he says "I hated it...But I always jumped. Otherwise I would have lost face with Phineas, and that was unthinkable." (p. 34)

His own thoughts, his own fears of everything else, become irrelevant in the face of what Finny wants for him. He is unwilling to do anything that might risk Finny unchoosing him, something he sees as inevitable if he were to be wholly himself.

"At that time it never would have occurred to me to say ‘I don’t feel like it tonight,’, which was the plain truth every night…acting against every instinct of my nature, I went without a thought of protest.” (p. 34)

“None of this mattered now; I would have listlessly agreed to anything.” (p. 59)

“But there was no mistaking the shield of remoteness in his face and voice…The war then passed away from me, and dreams of enlistment and escape and a clean start lost their meaning for me.” (p. 108)

A clean start, something Gene thinks might be better for him - it cannot happen so long as it might lead to that remoteness, that emotional and physical separation.

Unstable and intense interpersonal relationships alternating between idealization and devaluation

Gene has this one in spades.

A person with BPD's most intense relationship is called their favorite person - despite the name, this phenomenon is generally miserable for the person with BPD, if not both people involved - and the alternation in how one views their favorite person is called splitting. Phineas is Gene's favorite person - his greatest love, his greatest envy, his enemy if only in mind. And Gene splits on him a lot.

Obviously the intensity of their relationship, even beyond the unignorable homoerotic undertones, is...beyond the scope of what is normal, to say the least.

“He drew me increasingly away from the…crowd…into a world inhabited by just himself and me…just Phineas and me alone among all the people of the world” (p. 127)

Alongside Gene's perpetual desperation for Finny's approval is a view of his best friend that fluctuates wildly from near-religious devotion to unfettered hatred, often in short spans of time or even from one page to the very next.

“Finny had practically saved my life.” (pg. 32)

“I wouldn’t have been on that damn limb except for him.” (pg. 33)

“‘You’re too good to be true.’” (p. 44)

“He was no better than I was.” (p. 56)

“There was a swift chain of explosions in my brain, one certainty after another blasted—up like a detonation went the idea of any best friend, up went affection and partnership…you [Gene and Finny] are even in enmity…you did hate him…he hated you” (p. 53)

Markedly unstable sense of self

This one is very prominent as well. Gene’s relationship with Finny is incredibly codependent, and after Finny’s injury Gene increasingly begins to see himself as part of Finny rather than his own person. And it is a relief to him, because beyond Finny he has no idea who he is.

“I was Phineas, Phineas to the life…I had no idea why this gave me such intense relief, but it seemed, standing there in Finny’s triumphant shirt, that I would never stumble through the confusions of my own character again.” (p. 62)

“And I lost a part of myself to him then, and a soaring sense of freedom revealed that this must have been my purpose from the first: to become a part of Phineas.” (p. 85)

When Phineas dies, Gene "could not escape the feeling that this was [his] own funeral" (p. 194) - his sense of self is so inseparable from Finny that he, or at least a significant part of himself, dies with him.

In death, Gene remarks Finny had "taken [Gene's anger] with him" (p. 203) - and though this part of him is perceived as undesirable, as better off gone regardless, it is inarguably a part of Gene. Another part of him that is gone "forever" (p. 203).

Even as an adult, 15 years later, Gene has trouble defining exactly who he is. When considering how he has changed since he was last in Devon, all he can come up with is the following:

"Older...taller...I had more money and success and 'security'" (p. 11-12)

Objective, material, impersonal statements. He describes himself as one might describe someone they see from across the street.

Who actually is Phineas? is a question very much worth asking of the book, considering Gene's notoriously unreliable narration. But one could also ask Who is Gene? and come up with just as uncertain of an answer, even though we spend the entirety of the novel seeing the world through his voice.

Self-damaging impulsivity, such as substance abuse

Gene's indulgence in Finny's desires often involves Gene knowing that something has the potential to harm him, whether physically or otherwise, and yet doing it regardless. For the intellectual, 'reasonable' counterpart of the main duo, one would expect more pushback even if only in Gene's own mind. Yet he doesn't resist - he simply does.

“With the sensation that I was throwing my life away, I jumped into space.” (p. 17)

“Going there risked expulsion, destroyed the studying I was going to do for an important test the next morning, blasted the reasonable amount of order I wanted to maintain in my life…’All right,’ I said.” (p. 46)

Even without Finny, Gene describes himself as prone to unnecessarily risky things.

“But I was used to finding something deadly in things that attracted me; there was always something deadly lurking in anything I wanted, anything I loved. And if it wasn’t there…then I put it there myself.” (p. 101)

Finny also describes Gene as "smok[ing] like a forest fire" (p. 127) - in the 1940s smoking was extremely widespread and normalized, but apparently Gene engages in substance use to an extent that was considered excessive even then.

Affective instability; intense episodes lasting hours to days

Even beyond his…turbulent relationship with Finny, Gene displays extreme changes in mood.

“I felt the unhinged, uncontrollable joy…which had broken out sometimes during those days [at Devon]” (p. 10)

“I wanted to break out crying from stabs of hopeless joy, or intolerable promise…because I knew of too much hate to be contained in a world like this.” (p. 55)

This is best demonstrated by the first portion of his strange episode after Finny's second leg injury, during which he finds himself both laughing hysterically over bizarre, imagined situations and crying. His thoughts are stilted, words and phrases repeating.

"That was pretty funny. I’ll bet I could get a rise out of Finny with— Dr. Stanpole was fairly gabby too. What was he always saying. Nothing. Nothing? Well there must be something he was always saying." (p. 182-183)

"Did Finny like Phil Latham? Yes, of course he did. But wouldn’t it be funny if he suddenly turned to him and said, 'Phil Latham, you’re a boob.' That would be funny in a way. And what about if he said, 'Dr. Stanpole, old pal, you’re the most long-winded licensed medical man alive.' And it would be even funnier if he interrupted that night nurse and said, 'Miss Windbag, you’re rotten, rotten to the core. I just thought I ought to tell you.'" (p. 183)

“I couldn’t stop myself from laughing…I was laughing so hard it hurt my stomach…and then I noticed that there were tears all over my hand.” (p. 183)

Transient paranoid ideation or dissociation

Part of Gene’s devaluation stage with Finny is paranoia around the idea that Finny is trying to ‘ruin’ him in some way.

Finny merely studying for an exam becomes, to Gene, “his emergency measures to save himself” (p. 55) from failure in the competition that exists only in Gene’s own head.

When Finny tells Gene he was going to reach out for him as he fell, Gene’s immediate assumption is that it was to “‘drag me down too’’ (p. 65), rather than to simply stabilize himself so he wouldn’t crash to the ground. 

The second part of Gene's breakdown, after his first visit to Phineas, also shows his dissociation, feeling as if he is completely disconnected from the world, which is itself dreamlike and unstable.

"I was trying to cope with something that might be called double vision. I saw the gym in the glow of a couple of outside lights near it and I knew of course that it was the Devon gym which I entered every day. It was and it wasn’t. There was something innately strange about it, as though there had always been an inner core to the gym which I had never perceived before, quite different from its generally accepted appearance. It seemed to alter moment by moment before my eyes, becoming for brief flashes a totally unknown building with a significance much deeper and far more real than any I had noticed before." (p. 185-186)

“They rolled away impervious to me as if I were a roaming ghost…I alone was a dream, a figment which had never really touched anything. I felt that I was not, never had been and never would be part of this overpoweringly solid and deeply meaningful world around me.” (p. 186)

"But I could not hear, and that was because I did not exist." (p. 187)

The other 3 symptoms

Gene does display a bit of the other symptoms listed in the DSM-5 as well, though to a much more minor extent. The real-life, not-fictional-character diagnosis of BPD only requires 5 of the 9 symptoms to be present regardless, so I think what I’ve shown above is sufficient.

Suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats

While Gene never attempts suicide or outright expresses that he might do so, I at least think it's worth noting that:

A. He helped name the Super Suicide Society

B. He had no objections to the club he helped found, and would presumably be somewhat be a 'representative' of, being called such a thing

Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger

While Gene isn't an especially angry person, he does have a notable instance of violence when he gets into a fight with Quackenbush. The moment he hears an insult that would apply to Finny, he hits Quackenbush before he has the chance to think about it or even consciously acknowledge that he was offended on Finny's behalf rather than his own.

Chronic feelings of emptiness

I didn't find anything for this one. I may have simply missed something, though, so if there are moments you think would fit this, I would love to hear your thoughts! Clearly, this is a topic I'm very invested in.

Conclusion