The Alpha Incident (1978)
another bill rebane film!
this one was cursed from the getgo (but really most of them are to some degree or another) in that the disc it was supposed to be on in my box set did not actually have the film on it so i just streamed the fucker from youtube
The VERY FIRST LINE of this film isĀ āIt doesnāt make any senseā
two of us canāt understand half the stuff this hillbilly man on the train is saying but @gwenfrankenstien is conveying the gist of it. he knows the other man is a fed and is Transporting Something Suspicious
which is the Mystery Thing From Mars the science guys at the start were talking about
thereās some really excellent things happening in the score.
the science mans talking about the mars organism are just SO BORED its hilarious
nosy train hillbilly is the one who ruins everything by breaking things, i think.
they put some jello on a rat!
this movie also has some occasionally bewildering cuts/scene transitions
thereās an ominous buzzing when government man calls the government to report stuff and i genuinely cant tell if it was intentional or audio error on the copy we watched lmao
āHANK YOU DONE FUCKED UPā @gwenfrankenstien
oh and then everyone gets QUARANTINED what a thematically appropriate film.
everyone gets PISSED OFF at being QUARANTINED and the actual biochemist is trying very hard to keep control of everything and then someone of course attempts to fuck right off.
the biochemist shoots him in the arm and the guy who got shot just kinda shamefully follows him back to the office.
speaking of the mars virus organism thing,Ā āitd be really funny if it turns out it has no effect on humans after allā @gwenfrankenstien
i feel like thats too clever for this movie tho
anyway in the rats the primary symptom seems to beĀ āhead explodeā
the guy who got shot is whining about his civil rights!!!
hank recognizes he fucked up and feels so bad and i feel so bad for him!!
i am pretty fond of the choice of setting this all at like, a rail stop in the middle of nowhere. its kinda neat
āwe canāt fall asleep, if we do we DIEā OOOOOOOH DRAMA
Theyāre sending amphetamines
YOU CAN ALWAYS COUNT ON UNCLE SAM.
āTime for them to get fuckin blasted on methā @bioelectriccell
sorry the funniest part of the movie is what @gwenfrankenstien said and itsĀ āi figured out who beard scientist reminds me of and its.Ā tom mulcairā and this is only funny if youāre canadian.
thereās fifteen minutes left in the movie and nothing has happened to anyone. @gwenfrankenstien may have been onto something.
wow it takes until 1h24m for someone to fuckinā die in a movie thats 1h34m
and then uhhhh jenny kills herself so suicide warning outta fucking NOWHERE
im pretty sure the movie forgot about hank
@gwenfrankenstienā saysĀ āits billiam i suspect that the very end will be like.Ā hank in town spreading virusā so lets see
they apparently developed a cure offscreen and that gets delivered and - ITS FUCKING CYANIDE AND JACK KEELS OVER DEAD AND BIOCHEMIST TOM GUY HAS A FUCKING CRISIS HOLY SHIT WHAT A TWIST
and then some dudes in hazmat suits show up to clean up but TOm Biochemist isnāt dead bc he didnt take the cyanide but he SURVIVED because he didnt get infected BUT THEN THE HAZMAT SUIT GUYS SHOW UP and i think its implied he gets incinerated bc it looks like a spark about to ignite a flamethrower? or maybe they just shot him
ANYWAY it was like a solid 5/10 on the beetsometer for most of the movie and then the last 20 minutes are REALLY AWESOME the twist was GREAT WOW.
ā think it had the makings of a very solid sf horror novellaā @gwenfrankenstienā
emoji of the film: migrainetime.emoji
