#joharawrites

to the one i love, you asked me how many times what was it with you that i liked and loved. there were multiple reasons why i liked you back but when it comes to loving you, i had no reason why. perhaps, my love for you just came unknowingly. i just woke up one day that i love you. not knowing why, not knowing how. every day, i'm looking forward in seeing you, in sharing moments with you. you make my heart ache, you make my knees tremble, you make my heart have thunderous heartbeat, you make me nervous, you make me happy, you love me. i was always the girl who's afraid of taking risks. i entertained some guys but i never got serious in going out with them. and then you came, you changed my mindset. you took away my fear of being attached, my fear of taking risks. and that's one thing that i'll always thank you for. the lunch-out, the study-out, the "let's eat dinner together because i wanna see you", the good morning texts, the "i miss you's", the unexpected "i love you" messages that you send me everyday, the "you look so pretty everyday" compliments i get from you, the "let me tie your shoes", the long walks, the real talks and ethose were the little things, the "you're the one i'm getting this strength from", and the everything. those were only some of the little things you did that made me happy. i never knew you'd come into my life at the most unexpected time. i never knew that i'd know someone like you. i never knew that you'd become so special to me. i love the you that you show me and i love the you that you show in people. i love your dark sides as well as the bright. i love you. here's to life goals before relationship goals. i love you. always.

never forget to tell the person you love or care about that you love them. never let a day pass by and not telling them that they matter to you. it's your initiative on how to make him/her happy. love is not all about the material stuff, it's also about the sweet messages, sweet efforts and unexpected surprises. make your person feel special. keep that person.

you said you loved me, you broke me, never fixed me; never will i be.

And then you made me feel like I'm worth the try. That I am not worthless. That I am deserving. That I do not deserve grief, pain and despair. That I am the person who deserve happiness. That they are thankful to have me. That I am the person they could run to whenever they're grieving. That I am the person who's one call way. That I am the person who deserves love and only love. But you hurt me, like what everyone else did. And so, I built my walls up high again. I am back. Heartless. Shattered. Worthless.