"Joey!" You smiled, hugging your cousin tight.

"I guess I'm not important enough, huh?" Richard fake pouted beside you. "No Richard! I see how it is."

"You're important to me, Rich," you told Richard. Joel looked at you weirdly, but shook it off. Richard was only a friend to you, like the other boys were. Joel was sure of it. You're his family, and family is off limits. Something he reminded the boys whenever you came around. It was something about your personality that everyone thinks you're flirting with them.

You recalled the first time you've met the boys. Erick had grown a small crush on you, and Joel had to explain that it was just your personality that seemed like you liked someone. Joel has seen you with a crush, and you became a little shy thing and couldn't talk. Which is why you had to be careful around Zabdiel. Joel couldn't know about your crush on one of his best friends.

"How's everything? How's school? I saw that you got on the dean's list last semester. I love having a smart cousin," Joel rambled.

"How does it feel? Because I have no idea," you joked. "No, seriously everything is great. How are you? How does it feel to be singing every night? I can't wait to see mi primito perform."

"Y/N, you're only two weeks older than me," Joel reminded you. He always reminded you.

"Yeah, two weeks wiser," you responded. "You'll know what I'm talking about in a couple weeks."

"Escuché y/n," you turned around and saw Zabdiel walking into the room. Your heart skipped a beat. Was it possible that he got more perfect?     

"Hola, Zabdiel. ¿Qué tal?" You quickly responded, before anyone said anything.

"Bien," Zabdiel answered. "A—are you going to watch the show later?" Zabdiel asked. You noticed his English was better than the last time you saw him, which was months ago, maybe even a year.     

"She's going to watch her favorite cousin perform, am I right?" Joel said, wrapping his arm around your shoulders, giving a look to Zabdiel.

"Wait, Israel is here?" You jokingly responded. Joel's mouth dropped, pretending to be hurt. "I wouldn't want to miss you performing. You guys are always amazing. Siempre increíble." Would you be lying if you ended up scrolling through some cnco tags on Instagram, Twitter, or Tumblr? Maybe. Do you always scroll past pictures of Zabdiel? No, never. You can't help that he's attractive. And tall. "How long do you guys have until the show starts?"     

"A few hours until we need to get dressed and warm up," Joel replied. "So we're cool for a couple hours. Let's go sit."

"Oh thank god. My legs are killing me, I had to walk here—"

"What?!"

"From the bus stop a few blocks down," you finished. Then proceeded to take the first chair you saw. "My dad would kill me if I walked all the way from campus here."

"Sabes que te extrañan," Joel told you. "Don't give that look, y/n. They're your parents, and they love you."      

"Yeah, well," you shrugged. You noticed Joel was about to say something, but you immediately cut him off. "You know what, Joel? I love my parents. But did you notice that they didn't come to my graduation. They said they were too busy. But you know who did come? The one person in a completely different country the night before, and he was only there for a couple hours before he flew back to perform the next day. They didn't even help me move into my dorm freshman year. They didn't even say goodbye to me. They can't even make time to call me or video chat. Estamos ocupados." You wiped your cheeks with your hand.       

You hated doing it, but you needed to for Joel's sake. You can't put all your anger out on your cousin. He doesn't deserve it all. You stood up and stormed out of the room. Everyone watching you before you got to the door.

"What did you do, Joel?" Was the question everyone thought, and Richard said aloud. Joel ignored that question, and went after you. Not noticing Zabdiel went after you first, leaving before the door slammed.

"¿Estás bien?" You heard Zabdiel behind you. You wiped your tears again, and turned around. Zabdiel sighed, sitting beside you. "You can talk to me about it."   

"No hay nada de que hablar," you responded, looking at your shoes.       

"Sé que eso no es verdad," Zabdiel replied. "Y/N, if you can't talk to Joel about this. ¿Con quién hablarás?"  

"My parents say they miss me, but if they actually did, they would make time for me. They did it for my other siblings. They've never really cared for me."

"No digas eso."      

"¡Pero es la verdad!" You shouted in frustration. "Did you know I was unplanned? Isaac is fifteen years older than me." Isaac was the youngest sibling until you were born. "It was like they already raised their kids, and they couldn't raise another one. I'm so grateful for my tía Patricia. She's the one who practically raised me. She always came to my concerts, my plays. I know it was because Joel was in them too, but she'd always bring me a bouquet to give me afterwards. She'd say it was from my parents, but I knew she bought me it, because my parents never asked how was anything when I got home." You turned towards Zabdiel, and he didn't take his eyes off of you.    

"¿Es por eso que te fuiste a la universidad aquí?" Zabdiel questioned.    

"No," you shook your head. "They wanted me to stay home, and go to the community college there. But here, I have a full ride, and it was here that had what I wanted to study."

"What do you study for?"

"I want to be a language teacher. Whether it's teaching spanish or english as a second language, Italian, alemán or French. This school offers all of this, and I don't have to pay the tuition for four years? I hoped my parents jumped to this opportunity, but they'd rather have me at home helping out in the house."

"I feel like they are your parents and they should support you and whatever you do."

You smiled at Zabdiel. The two of you were too close, but that didn't stop you two from leaning in closer. "Zabdiel—"

"Y/N!" The two of you scooted away from each other. Joel turned into the hallway you were hiding at. You quickly stood up, and dusted off your pants. "I didn't mean to make you upset—"

"I'm not upset," you interrupted.

"You just stop talking and walk away whenever someone picks a nerve," Joel pointed out. "And I shouldn't be pushing your parents on you like that. I know your situation better than you think, y/n. But they're still your parents."

"Joel, can we not talk about this? I'm fine. It's been awhile since I saw family, and I just want to hang out with my favorite cousin."

"What happened to Israel's here?"

"Callate. You're all my favorite cousins, just not at the same time, because sometimes you're annoying," you poked Joel's sides.

"I thought you went to the bathroom," Joel said to Zabdiel, who he had finally noticed.

"Ah. I was looking for it, but saw y/n sitting here," Zabdiel explained. You had already walked away from the two of them, but you overheard Zabdiel. "Sé que es tu prima."

— — —

"¿Te gusta Zabdiel?"   

You turned around seeing Christopher. You glanced around the room, and everyone was occupied with something. Christopher had asked you in almost a whisper, so only you could hear.

"If you don't answer, you're giving me an answer," Christopher added.

"No," you lied. "What makes you think that?"

"No sé," Christopher responded. "Maybe all the secret glances that you and him share? Or Zabdiel leaving the room right after you. You two should be more sneaky about whatever you two are doing before Joel finds out."

"There's nothing going on between me and Zabdiel," you told Christopher. "He and I are just friends, like you and I," you quickly added before he said anything else.

"Maybe there's nothing going on between you two, but you want something, no?"

"Don't you have to get ready for soundcheck?" You questioned.

"You're avoiding my question, y/n," Christopher responded. He leaned in closer to you, and whispered, "If you like Zabdiel, don't let Joel be the reason you can't be happy. Because all your cousin wants is for you to be happy."

You felt eyes on you, and you glanced up to see Zabdiel glancing between you and Christopher, and Joel watching the two of you. "So, let's say I do like this guy," you told Christopher. Christopher smiled at you, after giggling that he was right. "What would I do?"

"That is easy. Just tell him how you feel, because I'm pretty sure he feels the same way— if not, more."

"I'm not talking about the feelings we feel for each other. I'm talking about someone being overprotective," you responded.

"Maybe I can help with that," Christopher answered. "Because you deserve to be happy, princesa. And if this was just a crush, you'd be over it by now."

"We have to go to sound check now," Erick said walking up to Christopher and you. "¿Vienes?" Erick asked you. You nodded and followed the boys onto the stage for sound check.

— — —

"Is everything okay?" You turned around to face your cousin. "You seem a bit distracted," Joel told you.

"I'm fine," you responded. "I— I have midterms next week. Y'know, college stuff."

"Y/N, I know you a lot better than I know myself. You're distracted by something else, and as your cousin. You're favorite cousin, and best friend, you're obligated to tell me," Joel said.

"Joel, it's nothing."

"It's not nothing, y/n," Joel yelled. "If it was nothing, you wouldn't be distracted. You don't think I notice the way you're biting your nails? You've been doing that since you were a kid whenever you overthink something." You pulled your hand away from your mouth, wiping them on your jeans. "Dímelo."

"I— you know what, Joel? I love you because you're my cousin. And I would anything for you, because family is the best thing. But what gives you the right to tell me who I can or cannot like. I'm twenty years old, and I'm old enough to make my own decisions. And if I like one of your friends, you'll just have to deal with it." You huffed, and left Joel alone.

"Y/N!"

"Ahora no, Christopher," you said while walking past the Ecuadorian. You kept walking until you got back to the main room backstage. You pushed through the doors.

"Girl's on a mission," Richard commented as you passed him.

You stopped in front of Zabdiel. He stopped playing his guitar, and looked up at you. "Me gustas," you told him. "I really like you. And I know you probably don't want to have feelings for me because I'm Joel's cousin, but he can't stop me from liking you, or me from doing this." Without another thought, you pressed your lips against Zabdiel's, and in that moment you swore you saw fireworks. When you pulled away, you immediately started apologizing. "Sorry, I—"