#jnvq

Here’s an attempt at writing our story. I’m not really sure where or how to even begin with this post — How did we really begin?

As I have mentioned in all of my previous blog entries, I found you when I wasn’t even looking for anything or anyone for that matter. You were just there — someone I know by name and someone who I casually have small talks with whenever we ran into each other. It has…

JNVQ Diaries: A Love Letter

Babe,

Happy quarantine birthday! Who would’ve thought that this year would turn out this way? We have so many plans for this year, and I can still remember vividly how we’ve been arguing on how to spend my birthday before the quarantine was imposed. That was in March, it’s been three months and we’re now celebrating your birthday but we still haven’t seen each other since. It’s really…

♪ People say we shouldn't be together, but I say they don't know what they talk, talk, talkin' about ♫

I don't think any of us saw what was coming until it was actually happening before our very eyes - it all started somewhere along those sun emoji days, a little pack of gummy worms, a warm cup of hot chocolate - pin-pointing how it all started is pretty hard, and does that even matter, really? A lot of people also said it wouldn't work and that what we have will end before it even succeeds; we started off with almost everyone against us, but, again, does that even matter? What mattered to me most was how I felt about you.

♪ Just one touch and I was a believer, every kiss it gets a little sweeter, it's getting better, Keeps getting better all the time ♫

I can still remember everything as if it was just yesterday. None of it was ever supposed to happen, but falling in love with you and choosing you was the only right decision I've ever made in my 25 years of existence. I remember that one Friday night which I thought was the last of "us," I was so sure that what we have would end right there and then before it even started. But now, here we are. No more last Fridays or last days, all my days and nights are dedicated for you and only you.

♪ They don't know about the things we do, they don't know about the I love yous but I bet you if they only knew, they would just be jealous of us ♫

I can't believe it's been a year already! We've come so far, yet we still have a long way to go. If I was asked to go through every complication, I'd go through all of it again in a heartbeat if it meant being here with you. You've taught so much in the past year and though you always make me roll my eyes, you also never fail to make me fall in love with you over and over again. A year may not have been long enough, but taking these baby steps will lead us to a lifetime with each other. I will always celebrate the days that I have with you.

♪ They don't know what we do best, that's between me and you, our little secret, but I wanna tell 'em I wanna tell the world that you're mine ♫

Thank you for always trying to make me see the beauty in everything when all I see is darkness but most of all, thank you for loving and understanding such a cantankerous person like me (you're cantankerous yourself, so let's call it quits). Regardless of it all, I love you. If I would be given a second life, I'd make sure to find you just so I could spend another lifetime with you. Happy first anniversary - my heart will forever be yours.

This is a long overdue post of what had transcribed on May 11 and May 12.

Looking for a relaxing place to stay at away from the noisy and crowded areas of the metro, we found this haven sprawled along the shores of Batangas which is just a 3-hour drive from the city. Being away from the hustle and bustle of the city life, Altamare Dive & Leisure Resort is a very relaxing place to spend your weekends at with its beautiful and peaceful ambiance and sumptuous food.

We’ve been planning to have this “trip” for quite some time and I never thought it’d push through, until it did and it was truly worth the wait. It’s been a while since I last spent some time away from the city and, well, my parents. Honestly, this is the first time since I started working that I finally had a real breather and it was all made possible by the same person who managed to change the entirety of my world.

Norman and I may fight a lot and I know I sometimes tend to be stubborn, but one thing that I love about our relationship is that I learn a lot of things from him – may it be about relationships, the universe, the sea, and even science – we never run out of things to talk about. Most of all, I am thankful that he keeps pushing me to my limits (in a good way).

I never thought love could feel this good -- I think God never gives us that perfect fairytale-like love that we've dreamt about as kids, but rather, he gives us the love we never thought we needed. Also, I think that when you find the right person for you, you'll be surprised at how time can fly.

With you, everyday is something to celebrate about. Sometimes it amazes me how selfless you can be despite your claims of being selfish -- you cheer me up despite having problems of your own and it moves me how despite feeling like you're carrying the weight of the world, you still choose to carry a bit of mine for me.

You are such a blessing in my life despite me being so stubborn and reckless and just plain out of control. You are always willing to go that extra mile for me. Despite everything we've gone through, you're still here and I will always be thankful for that. Thank you for always putting up with my mood swings.

We didn’t cross paths just for us to go in different directions at the end of the road; for no matter what happens and wherever our feet leads us, you will always be the person I would like to hold hands with while walking this long stretch of a road.

We didn’t spend our time sharing stories with each other just to fall silent after the last sentence. I don’t think I will ever run out of stories to tell you and I sure am never going run out of stories of you. I will never run out of words to write to you – even my whispers and my sighs will be a statement of my love for you.

I didn’t hug you so tight just for you to feel like we’re drifting apart after I loosen my arms around you. I will stay true to our promise of forever and as long as we both feel the same way, we will remain warriors and heroes of our relationship.

We didn’t make all these memories just for you to feel like we’re not going to make it in the end. I may not have a full grasp of what tomorrow will bring, but I hope you keep this in mind: I will always choose you – I would die and live a thousand lifetimes and search for you in each one of them just to fall in love with you all over again.

5:00 a.m.

When I was younger, I used to think about how someone would be capable of loving me  — the type of love I've watched in movies, or read about in books, or even in the songs I've heard on the radio.

I wanted a cliche and I didn't have any idea how I would make that happen.

Little did I know, you were the answer to those thoughts I've had that seemed light years ago.

6:30 a.m.

You always arrive at work earlier than I do. It is usually around 6:30 a.m. when I arrive in Makati, and you were waiting for me at the street where my mom always drops me off.

I've been walking in this street alone every morning before this, and I didn't have a problem with it. But today, I realized, that I'm so glad I'm walking with you.

I remember that TVC, "Para kanino ka bumabangon?"

I think I finally found my answer.

7:00 a.m.

Breakfast, they say, is the best and most important meal of the day.

And that never occurred to me until I shared every breakfast of every day with you.

12:00 p.m.

I always look forward to spending lunch with you.

Usually, we were just watching that game in the office that I'm not even interested in, but I get to spend it with you and that's all that matters.

1:30 p.m.

It was around this time when I realized I'm falling in love with you.

I was on my station, doing the things I need to accomplish for that day and it struck me how much I wanted to spend all my days with you.

And then that song suddenly played: ♪ ♫ Do you ever think when you're all alone All that we can be, where this thing can go? Am I crazy or falling in love?  ♪ ♫

2:15 p.m.

It was all surreal. I can't remember how it all started.

It was 2:15 in the afternoon, and I was thinking about how you've held my hand that morning while you were teaching me how to figure out solving that stupid cube.

It was all too complicated, but I just found myself falling deeper in love with you.

4:20 p.m.

We just got off from work, and we were waiting for my mom to pick me up at one of Makati's streets.

We were talking and laughing and I thought: Nothing would ever be as simple and as beautiful as this.

And then you kissed my cheek. I've never been happy to be wrong.

8:30 p.m.

Supposedly, I'm already asleep by this time. But I've been thinking of you and how the universe could possibly give me a star brighter than the sun.

I haven't been sleeping enough lately, because I want to spend every minute of every hour of every day talking and listening to you.

We talk about so many things, most of the time, just random stuff that we see online. Or plans about the future. Where we will get married, how many kids we want.

But things change. One day, we might want to change the church, or the number of kids. But one thing won't change — Us.

9:15 p.m.

I was so frustrated with everyone, and instead of running away from all of it, I run to you.

Sometimes, I think you're getting sick of all my rants, but you're still trying your best to make me feel better.

Whoever said that eating an apple a day would keep the doctor away definitely doesn't know you exist.

Good thing, because I want you all to myself.

10:35 p.m.

Every relationship has its downs, and this was one of those times.

We were arguing about something that our hearts doesn't agree with  — because I never tell you what's bothering me, and one day, it all just exploded like wildfire.

You don't want to talk about it, but I insisted and we ended up fighting.

Because I love you... so much, and we need to talk about it.

3:00 a.m.

People say that nothing good ever happens after 2 a.m.

But it was around 3 a.m. and I realized that it was almost six months since we were together.

And not even the stars could compare to the beauty of that thought.

4:45 a.m.

I wake up to the thought of you.

You always say that I'm not as clingy, but you don't really know what's going through my mind  — you.

I would like to spend every waking hour with you, and I don't think I'll ever get used to that.

No, wait, I would like to spend 24/7 with you.

I love you.

In the place where every ending is entangled with a new beginning, and each night is a bridge to another day...

You came at the time when I wasn't looking, at the time when all my doors and windows are closed. You came knocking at my doorstep without uttering a single word as I let you in without questions asked. I opened the door, welcomed you in, and made you feel comfortable.

I will let you stay in the depths of my heart for as long as you want. I will let you make my entirety your home and my love your blanket.

Let me fill your days with certainty as you stay calm in my arms every day. So as when you close your eyes and sleep, you wouldn't have to worry, because I will still love you the moment you wake up.

I will walk with you, stop at places if you ever feel tired, and I'd even walk backwards if we ever feel the need to trace back our tracks.

I may not know if my love would ever suffice how I truly feel for you and I may not be the prettiest girl to brag about, but please let me choose you every single day for the rest of my life.

Because in my eyes, there is only you.