But scrambled eggs are delicious

Framing gifs would be amazing wouldn’t it?? I know lots of animation work I would want on my wall. 

Thanks for your interest in prints!  I’ve uploaded both a day and a night version into my shop. Here’s a link: https://society6.com/alyssascott/prints

jessicatty

replied to your post

“okay all previous prompts (*cough*) have gotten too invested to work...”

davekat FAKE MARRIAGE/DATING

You’d have never thought you would be thanking the stars for having Bro as a guardian, but then you friended Karkat on Facebook and you learned what it’s like having a supportive, encouraging, overly religious family was like and it was horrifying. No status goes unremarked on, no tagged picture goes unliked (which explains his 45 minute rant about your photography), no high score on Candy Crush goes unchallenged by some distant relative.

It’s fascinating really. You could probably switch your major to anthropology and write your senior thesis on the dynamics of the Vantas family, using only direct sources and quotes. Screencaps included. Be cited for decades to come in the study of the occult family style. Mafia mentality in relation to blood. What close circuit communities do for the introduction of modern ideals.

Or, you could just make a bunch of shitty comics about it and laugh about it with Karkat over cereal at 2PM on a Tuesday.

The most surprising thing was that he wasn’t out to them yet. Someone as blatantly and proudly queer as Karkat Motherfucking Vantas just doesn’t keep his mouth shut around homophobic ignorant shut-ins but then his great aunt comments on his status, “LOL ITS OKAY SWEETIE, YOU’LL FIND A NICE GIRL AND START YOUR OWN FAMILY. JUST MAKE SURE SHE’S A VIRGIN!! LOL”

And you’re sitting there imagining them all wearing filly collars and wooden shoes because these people are living in the fucking Dark Ages. Karkat being choosy about a girl’s virginity? Any of his friends being actual virgins?

Every holiday is a brand new ridiculous 4chan-esque story in family time nightmare meals. His second cousin eloped with a priest of a “conflicting” religion. His uncle on his father’s sideis in a fight with his wife because she found out he’d been having coffee with a group that accepted a gay couple. There’s a cousin you all know as The Cousin who is apparently trying to make everyone more open minded about topics and is apparently Making It Worse but explaining liberal topics in the Worse Goddamn Way Possible and honestly. You’d rather take on Bro than deal with that level of bullshit.

Needless to say, you can kind of understand why Karkat is a bit crazy.

You, Rose, and John all tend to invite him to holiday meals with Mr. Egbert six months in advance to allow him an excuse to get out of these fucking things. Mr. Egbert gives stern looks for swearing but everyone would be wearing nothing but crop tops, booty shorts, and rainbow thigh highs and his smile wouldn’t falter. You all tried it once too.

But then, one night, Karkat almost kicks down your door looking like he’d just been steamed with some lobsters and looking just as happy as the lobsters would be.

“Sup.”

“I’m going to come out to my entire fucking family as the gayest shit-talking liberal aitheist anti-Christ figure they’ve ever had the misfortune of inviting into their prison of a community and you’re going to pose as my apathetic unconventional douchelord boyfriend.”

You say, “Okay, two things: first, what the fuck brought this on?”

His face scrunches up and you can see him reliving the exact thing that brought this on. “They’re disowning my fucking godmother for admitting to being bi.”

“Dude.”

“Yeah, I know. What’s the second thing?”

“No,” you say.

“Yes,” he hisses. “You are the only person who won’t spend the entire fucking time giggling your ass off or trying to put your gross chalk stained hands all over me and you have enough patience to legitimately say ‘dank meme’ at every picture in every fucking photo album.”

You’ve always wanted to say “dank meme” at a photo album of a family who had no idea what a meme was. Damn him, he knows your secret.

Which is how you find yourself sitting at a table across from The Cousin on Thanksgiving.

no

same. i ordered pizza instead. again. :(

I’ve had days like that I feel 4 u my friend

thank u friend

we shall get through this somehow

awww im sorry it got to be too much for you but you gotta do what you got to do for your own peace of mind so don’t sweat it ok?

yeah

omfg im dying heLP