#jenks

here are my first impressions of the characters:

Btw I'm poking fun but I am enjoying the book!

Rosemary: Disney Princess learns how the poors™ live

Ashby: Dunno too much. Captain...

Dr Chef: THE MVP BESTEST AT ALL THINGS (I head-cannon him with french accent because chef)

Jenks: Halfling Bard

Kizzy: Undiagnosed ADHD

Corbin: Undiagnosed Autism (I like the guy, I feel a sort of kinship, too bad he's a space racist)

Sissix: Cool older cousin

Ohan: Diet mentat

Lovey: Tied with Dr. Chef in first place. I have a soft spot for robots in love.

Also this is the review that got me over the fence in starting to listen:

I don't get how Rich (I'm shocked its not white) guilt is true. To my knowledge humans aren't the hegemonic species.

Alice is dressing Jasper for his very first meeting with Jenks (the father of the Jenks in Breaking Dawn). An excerpt from this 1974 one-shot, Jasper POV.

"You do realize that the whole point is to intimidate him," I reminded Alice, looking at her in the mirror. "Not impress him. I'm supposed to look mysterious. Scary. Malevolent."

"You'th ook mythteriouth aiight," Alice mumbled around the collection of pin needles hanging out of her mouth. "Now hogth thtill."

"I look like a mild-mannered banker. Next one."

"Ogth FITHE!"

She peeled the banker alias off my shoulders, careful not to dislodge her alterations. "My study" now sported a tailor's triple dressing mirror, complete with fluorescent lighting overhead. What with Alice's diminutive size, there was a depression in the floor for the lucky victim to step into, at least, and not a stage. Rosalie and Esme were only too happy to oblige, but Alice's ventures into niche fashion were ever-expanding and she had finally crossed the Rubicon into men's formalwear. It was doubtful whether she would ever manage her own boutique, but that didn't stop her from enlisting Edward, Emmett, Carlisle, and me on a regular basis for model duty.

Her inspirations occasionally made their debuts in a half-dozen store windows scattered around the continent. It hurt her pride that so far, the only business owners willing to showcase her designs were the sort that her venture capital also happened to be holding up, but fame was fame. We were all just lucky we were impervious to pin needles.

Alice plucked the pins out of her mouth. Mumbling incoherently around them was an important part of the role, but they did have a tendency to start dissolving after a while. "You'll like this one," she said, producing a dark gray trench coat.

"Now that's more like it." I tried it on and peered at my three selves with satisfaction. "Hat?"

"Good grief, no. We're going for silent, edgy gangster, not Dick Tracy. Hmm... maybe these?" She darted into our bedroom closet and returned with a pair of aviator mirror sunglasses. I slipped them on.

"Oh, I like that," Alice decided. She leaned forward and planted her chin on my shoulder and wrapped her arms around my waist; we were the same height for the moment. She studied me in the mirror, twisting a little smile while I tried out a few homicidal expressions for her entertainment. "I like that a lot," she whispered in my ear. She did; I could feel it. Her eyes glazed over for a moment as she visited the future.

"Poor human," she said lightly. "You'll have him blubbering like a kid the moment he sees you. He'll never know what hit him."