#jedibetray

it was weird , feeling this connected to someone after such a short time. i'd only ever felt that way with merrin ; we'd clicked almost instantly , we'd understood each other. it felt the same with bode , just .. slightly more volatile. less comfort , more fire. i wondered wistfully how long it would be until i got burned from those flames.                    ❛            because .. y'know , we could switch. i could get the cool jetpack , & you can dangle or flip your way toward dagan's outpost instead.            ❜

[ SCAR ]:          noticing a scar on the receiver’s skin, the sender tentatively stops them from covering it up, and rests a gentle, soft kiss over it.

i felt bode's familiar lips meet my skin , sucking in a sharp breath as i lolled my head forward 'gainst the cot's pillow , arms sliding beneath it as i stretched out beneath him languidly. a back massage. it's a way to unwind , he said , a way to relax , he said. well , i'm far from relaxed , arching myself lazily beneath where he straddled my waist from behind , copper head tilting slightly to rest my cheek to the pillow with a soft chuckle.

                   ❛            mm .. lightsaber scar. had a few run - ins with an inquisitor called the second sister .. trilla , was her real name. i'm surprised i don't have more from her fights , to be honest.            ❜              with a soft noise catching in my throat , i shifted slightly , leaning forward on my elbows to prop myself up , bare shoulders relaxed as i tipped my head to the side , trying to crane my neck in an attempt to see what he was doing.                    ❛            don't look too hard , jetpack. i've got a lot of scars back there , we'll be here all night if you go searching for them ..            ❜

i missed when things were easy. when he would touch me with passion , with gentleness. i doubted we'd ever get back to that point , but my chest ached at the thought of missing him as much as i did. smoothing my hands slowly through my hair , i avoided meeting his gaze for a moment , hoisting kata purposefully into my arms , & wandering over toward merrin waited near her ship.                    ❛            mer's gonna take you on a quick trip to koboh to visit uncle greez , okay ? maybe you can help out with the garden on the roof , & you can tell your dad all about it later.            ❜

with a timid smile & a nod , she was gently ushered out of my arms by merrin , who i tenderly touched on the shoulder as she went , staring after the two as they vanished from my sight into the mantis. i turned back to where bode had been , meeting his dark gaze for a heated , silent moment , before i drifted my attention back toward rebuilding the temple.                    ❛            .. she'll be fine.            ❜

the urge to present questions made her smile and study her new acquaintance through warm toned eyes. finding his take intriguing, she decided to share some 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬. ❝ being human is quite interesting, isn't it ? the learning never stops, yet our hearts beat for a limited time. it's almost as if we are forced to decide who we are very early on. ❞ a pause. ❝ have you decided it yet ? what kind of a person do you want to be ? ❞

he shouldn't have the same struggles as me , but i knew it was more complicated than that. he was a father , he had a life. this was a job , we were doing a job together. when did that change ? i tipped my head slightly , rolling myself so my back halfheartedly met the mattress of the cot , catching bode's hand in my hair & planting a tender kiss to the inside of his wrist , studying the other man with wide , thoughtful blue eyes. there was a heartbeat of silence , blankets tangled around our waists , stretching my own hand up to lace our fingers together , running his knuckles absently along my stubbled maw.

                   ❛            okay. good. everyone .. everyone always leaves.            ❜              stay with me.

                   ❛            really ? oh good , i'm glad we managed to have that breakthrough.            ❜                the tightness in my voice stung at the walls of my throat , muscles coiled , spine stiff as i glared at where bode lingered across the room near his daughter , her innocent presence being the only thing keeping me from lunging toward the gunslinger. i'd never felt this angry before , this .. violent. the ghostly weight of cere's body still lingered in my trembling arms , the acrid tang of smoke stinging my nostrils , expression blank , numb as my arms hung at my sides , one hand near my saber , the other near my pistol , fixing bode with a glare one could only describe as cold.

                   ❛            you can't actually think you're getting out of this , bode.            ❜                where was a violent shudder that knotted at my insides , betrayal twisting with agony making me almost nauseous as i watched him , unblinking , legs locked in place despite the urge to prowl around my former companion like a predator circling it's prey.                    ❛            after what you did ? no , i'm doing this for them. for my family that i lost .. because of you.            ❜