#jcrush

One of the dating apps I am using is JCrush. To me a crush can be anything from “this person is cute” to “this could be someone important in my life, we have so much in common!” Lots of room for variation there. I realize that most of the people who use it see it as “I want to have sexy time with this person” which falls somewhere on my scale but not to the extremes. :P

Today there was a guy who had crushed me and I crushed back. He was cute, but not in a “I want to have sexy times” way. First of all, it was unrealistic because this guy is far away. Second of all it just feels wrong to think anything sexy because he is 16 years younger than I.

He starts messaging me. I have no idea where he is going with it. I just shut it down that I found him attractive but wanted nothing more. Apparently he did, and he found this response offensive. Before blocking me he tried to say he wasn’t actually interested in me on some level, and ended with “besides, you are Reform.”

Yup, he is Orthodox. 

I could only laugh. Imagine how he would react if he found out I was a convert? How small minded he came across. How arrogant. How... immature.  I do understand where he is coming from in the vast different philosophies and traditions/procedures between Reform and Orthodox. His posturing is what amused me.

I don’t filter my searches based upon stream. At this stage I figure that I don’t know enough, and I’m not going to cut off my nose to spite my face. Anything is possible. Love (and sex) can bridge a lot of things.

Today I went out on a date with a guy I met on JCrush. There have been some red flags in our conversations, but I could tell it was partially a cultural thing, it was obvious English wasn’t his first language. And honestly? The red flags were that he was too nice/sweet, not scary stuff.

I sorta feel he deserves a shot at a second date, but I don’t think I’m going to give him that chance. We are just too different (he’s an athlete, I’m a geek.) That and he treated the waitress like shit, was disrespectful to me, and was super late (45 minutes.) He made the waitress (we were at a Jewish deli) worry about me, even checked on me when I went to the bathroom asking if I needed help to get away from this guy.

He is Israeli. Like born there and goes home for the High Holidays. He calls himself traditional, but said he is orthodox. He confused me in saying he doesn’t keep kosher then a few minutes later saying he does. 

Apparently he is widening his search for someone to settle down with to include Conservative and Reform Jewish women. He stated that he prides himself in being able to separate out the “real Jewish women” from converts or goys. He did say that he thought Jewish women as a whole were too demanding with too high standards. :P Though, he said he would only date Jewish women because he is looking to settle down.

Towards the very beginning of the date I was honest with him about my being a convert, because I felt it was important and could be a deal breaker for him. He was shocked when I stated I was in the conversion process. He honestly thought that even with his “goy-dar” that I was culturally, born Jewish.