#jay may

My favorite song right now is "Sea Green, See Blue" by Jay May.  It reminds me that no matter how sad, beautiful, wonderful, or exhausting things are right now - they're only temporary.

All things end the same...in the same sputters of communication and feeling until the bright colors are just shades of gray. The passion becomes not so much a drive but a wonder you spectate about in memories.  Suddenly the love of your life is just rain on your windshield - falling down upon you every now and then, but easily wiped away - and everything that was your past life, you slowly recognize to just be that - the past.

And it doesn't matter how many ups and downs you've had, how many times you thought you had ended things with a person or how many times a friendship has faded or you've left a job you didn't think you'd return to.  Even if you came back to that person twenty times or you were rehired, leaving those first times is nothing like leaving for the last time.

The world sends us through so many different cycles of emotions, but I believe the following to be the most accurate: you fall in love with something and it consumes you.  Your love exists for whatever duration, but as it begins to end, you experience anger at the loss, absolute depression at the absence, a slow reassurance of yourself as a single entity, an evil curiosity at the things you are now missing and an eventual gray as even the things we loved or lived the hardest eventually fade away.