#javi garcia

But today, an old wound of yours was split wide open again.

You’d been on your way to your boyfriend, your boots kicking up dust with every hurried step. After not seeing him for almost the whole day, you were excited to finally be able to talk to him again. Yet, you came to a halt when you rounded the corner, the sight before you stopping you dead in your tracks.

It was them. Kate and Javi, standing far too close for your liking. You watched as Kate talked to Javi, or, correction: flirted with him. You could see it in the way she batted her lashes at him, her fingers grazing his forearm when she laughed. It wasn’t overt, but it definitely wasn’t subtle either.

You glanced away, feeling a pang of hurt in your chest; it wasn’t the flirting which pained you, however. It was the fact that Javi didn’t even seem to notice, nor care if he did. He didn’t tense up at her touch, didn’t show an ounce of discomfort. That stung the most.

Your stomach twisted. You knew their history. Of course you did. She had been his sister-in-law. She had loved him, perhaps still did. Yet seeing her act like this, so open and shameless, stirred something ugly inside of you.

Jealousy. The kind that tangled with your heart and whispered every insecurity you've ever carried. She’s more experienced. She knows him better. She’s more beautiful. You couldn’t help the thoughts that instantly took over your mind.

When you looked back, she was laughing again, louder this time, like she wanted to be heard, and Javi smiled back, rubbing the back of his neck the way he always did when he was trying to be polite.

The logical part of your brain tried to reason — Javi loved you, you knew it. He’d shown it countless times before. Like when he pressed kisses to your temple as you drifted off to sleep, when he sacrificed rations to make sure you ate, when he stood by you, always. But that logic had little say when it came to your heart. Because, as confident as you tried to be, deep down, you were still the girl fighting to be enough.

So, you turned on your heel and walked off, trying to swallow the lump in your throat. You walked back to the small building you and Javi had, over time, made into a home. The jealousy didn’t make you proud. It made you feel small, pathetic. And worse than that, ashamed.

You hadn’t slammed the door behind you, but you’d sure felt like it. Maybe you would’ve felt better if you had just confronted Kate then and there, but you simply couldn’t bring yourself to do it. You weren’t brave enough.

Instead, you opted for sitting on the edge of your shared bed, hugging your knees to your chest. You felt stupid. Stupid for feeling this way. Stupid for allowing yourself to get so worked up. Stupid for truly believing Javi would pick someone like you over someone like Kate.

A few minutes later, you heard the front door click as it opened and Javi’s voice call out, “Cariño?”

No response. You couldn’t. Because you knew if you did, the tears threatening to fall would do just that — fall.

Javi’s footsteps echoed softly against the wooden floor as he made his way through the house, straight to where you were. The faint sound of his footsteps grew louder as he got closer to the bedroom. You didn’t look up. Couldn’t. Your head remained on your knees, attempting to hide from the world. If you couldn’t see it, it couldn’t hurt you. Right?

“Babe?” he tried again, softer now. The bedroom door opened with a small creak as Javi stepped into the room, concern instantly flooding his features. The moment he saw you, his body stilled, like he was trying to assess the situation without making it worse. “Hey,” he said carefully, crouching down in front of you. “What’s going on?”

You remained quiet, your arms wrapped tight around your legs, keeping your face hidden. Though you willed yourself to keep it together, the tremble in your shoulders was giving you away. You couldn't even meet his eyes. A tear slipped free despite your best efforts, and when it hit the fabric of your pants with a darkened dot, you quickly wiped your face, like it could erase the evidence.

Javi’s brows furrowed, and his voice dropped even lower, gentler. “Did something happen?”

You merely shook your head, still refusing to speak to your boyfriend, who was only getting more concerned by the second.

“Hey, it’s okay, cariño. You can talk to me.” He reached out, brushing the hair away from your face, but you instinctively flinched back before you could stop yourself. You didn’t want him to touch you. Not when you felt so… betrayed.

That tiny reaction was all it took for Javi’s heart to shatter just a little. His hand hovered in the space between you for a second longer, then slowly retreated. “Okay,” he murmured, nodding, his voice soft and heavy with worry. “Okay, I won’t touch you, but please… tell me what’s going on.”

Your fingers curled tighter around the fabric of your pants. “It’s nothing,” you whispered, your voice barely audible.

“Doesn’t look like nothing,” Javi said, sitting on the floor beside the bed now, leaning his shoulder gently against the mattress as if grounding himself. He wasn’t pushing, not yet at least, but his presence alone begged you to let him in. “Is it something I did?”

Your chest ached at that question. Something about the way he asked it, so quietly, so full of guilt, made your already fragile heart twist painfully. You didn’t want to hurt him. God, you didn’t. But right now, the emotions swirling in your chest made it hard to breathe, let alone find the right words to say.

You bit your lip hard, then whispered, “It’s not just you.”

Javi stayed silent for a moment, giving you the space to continue, but you still didn’t look at him. You couldn’t bear to see his expression just yet. “I saw you… with Kate,” you said, the words raw on your tongue, leaving behind a bitter taste. “She was flirting with you. And you-” You stopped, shaking your head as your throat tightened. “You didn’t do anything.”

The silence that followed was deafening. Javi’s eyes widened a little, brows knitting. “Wait, what?”

You finally looked at him then, your vision blurred slightly by tears. “She was touching you, laughing like she was trying to remind you of everything you two used to have. And you just stood there. You smiled at her, Javi. You didn’t pull away, you didn’t say anything. You just let her…” You trailed off before the sob in your throat could escape. The shame of admitting how deeply it affected you only made the jealousy burn hotter.

“I didn’t want to feel this way,” you said after a pause, your voice cracking. “But I did. And it hurts. Because I feel like I’m constantly trying to prove that I’m good enough for you, and then I see her, and it’s like, of course you’d want her instead. She’s everything I’m not.”

Javi stared at you, stunned for a moment, as if trying to find the right place to start. “You think I’d want her instead of you?” His voice came out in disbelief. “Mi amor, no.”

You let out a shaky breath, trying to steady yourself, but the emotions were already unravelling. “I know it’s stupid. I know you’ve chosen me. But when I saw her with you, it was like this part of me just snapped. And I couldn’t help thinking, maybe you’d be better off with her. I mean, I can’t compete with her. She was there before me. She knows you better. She’s stronger, more… everything.”

“Stop,” Javi said, voice firm now, not angry but full of emotion. He turned more fully toward you, kneeling at your legs, taking both your hands gently in his. “Don’t you ever say that again.”

Your lip trembled. “It’s true.”

Javi shook his head, gripping your hands tighter, not painfully, just as if he was trying to anchor you, trying to will you to believe him through the warmth of his touch. “No, it’s not. None of that is true, cariño. Not one word.”

His gaze searched your face, his jaw tight with emotion, his brown eyes glinting with something wounded. The fact that you were hurting hurt him too. “Kate and I… whatever existed between us, it’s gone. Buried in the ashes of everything we lost. You know that. I told you that. And I meant it.”

You dropped your gaze, still feeling the sting of humiliation, your hands trembling slightly in his. “Then why didn’t you stop her?” you whispered. “Why didn’t you shut it down?”

He sighed, exhaling a breath like he’d been holding it since the second he walked in and saw you curled in on yourself. “Because I didn’t even notice she was flirting,” he admitted, eyes pleading with you to understand. “I was thinking about you. About how I hadn’t seen you all day and was hoping I’d run into you soon. I was just being polite, but I wasn’t encouraging her. I swear to you.”

You blinked, surprised by the raw honesty in his voice.

“I get it now,” he continued, voice quieter but no less sincere. “I should’ve seen it. Should’ve told her straight up that it wasn’t okay. And I’m sorry I didn’t. But you gotta believe me. You’re the one I want. You’re the one I love.”

Your throat clenched, and for a second, the room fell quiet again, save for the distant hum of life outside the window. “But she knows you,” you said softly, more to yourself than to him. “She’s been there since the beginning. That kind of history... I can’t compete with that.”

Javi’s face softened, and he reached out, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. This time, you didn’t flinch. “No, she knew who I used to be,” he spoke, voice thick with conviction. “The man who was too afraid to fight back. Too afraid to step up. The man who kept running. But you, you’re the one who’s been here through it all. You’ve seen the worst of me. You’ve stood beside me while I’ve tried to become better. That means more to me than anything that ever existed in the past.”

You broke. The tears came in silent waves, your body shaking with them, and Javi didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around you. He sat beside you, pulling you into his chest as tightly as he dared, holding you like he could keep every piece of you from falling apart.

“I’m sorry,” you choked out, your fists curling into the fabric of his shirt. “I’m sorry I got jealous. I’m sorry I didn’t just talk to you-”

Javi shook his head instantly, burying his face in your hair as he held you tighter. “Don’t apologise for feeling, cariño,” he murmured into your ear. “You’re allowed to feel jealous. You’re allowed to hurt. You’re allowed to come to me with those feelings. I want you to.”

You nodded against his chest, the solid weight of his arms around you a balm to your frayed nerves. His heartbeat thumped steadily beneath your cheek, grounding you, reminding you that he was here and he wasn’t going anywhere.

“I just hate that I doubted you,” you whispered, voice small, thick with tears. “You deserve someone who trusts you completely. I don’t want to be the person who falls apart at the first sign of something like that.”

Javi leaned back just enough to look at you, his hands still gently cupping your arms. His gaze was intense, unwavering. “I don’t expect you to be perfect. I don’t want perfect. I want you. All of you. The strong parts, the scared parts. The parts you think are too messy to love. Those are the ones I love the most.”

You swallowed, your hand sliding up his chest slowly, fingers curling into the collar of his shirt like you were afraid he’d vanish if you let go. “Then promise me,” you whispered, “if something like that happens again, if someone tries something, you’ll shut it down. I just… I need to know you see it. I need to know you’ve got my back.”

Javier’s eyes didn’t leave yours. Not for a second. When he spoke, his voice was full of something deeper than a vow. “I promise,” he said. “You have my word. From now on, I’ll shut it down the second it starts. No more politeness, no more letting things slide. You come first. Always.”

The certainty in his voice made something fragile inside you start to mend. Slowly. Like a bridge being rebuilt one plank at a time. You did believe him because you knew Javier. Knew the way his heart worked, the way he loved once he chose someone. And he had chosen you.

He always had.

You let out a trembling breath, tears still clinging to your lashes but no longer falling. Javi leaned in, brushing a soft kiss to your forehead, lingering there. “I love you,” he murmured against your skin. “You’re not a replacement. You’re not second-best. You’re the one.”

“I love you too,” you whispered, voice raw with emotion.

He smiled then and leaned in, kissing you slowly, tenderly, like there was no rush. Like all the time in the world had paused for just the two of you. You melted into it, arms wrapping around his neck, your body relaxing for the first time all day. His kiss tasted like reassurance, like safety, like home.

When he finally pulled back, he pressed his forehead to yours. “You matter more to me than anything, okay? And if Kate ever tries that again, I’ll make it very clear where my heart is.”

You gave a quiet nod, sniffling but smiling just a little. “Good. Because next time, I might just punch her.”

That earned a soft chuckle from Javi. “I’d pay to see that.”

“You’re not supposed to encourage violence,” you teased, voice still soft but lighter than before.