#janebeale

Tuesday 7th July 2020

Hello again everyone! So sorry for the late post, but due to working 6 days on the run I have only found the time now to type up this post. This iconic episode is one of my absolute favourites and is part of one of my all time favourite story-lines! I am so pleased that this has been chosen as one of EastEnders' iconic episodes! I remember it like it was yesterday, everything about it so was gripping and I feel it had everyone biting their finger nails and on the edge of their seats! This iconic episode was first aired on 1st January 2010! How has it been 10 years since Chryed were on our TV screens?!

I feel like I really want to mention that for those of you who are Ballum fans, as much as I love Ballum, before Ballum we had Chryed!!! I was such a huge Chryed fan, and I still remain to this day, even though it’s been 10 years since they’ve been a part of Albert Square! Christian and Syed were such a brilliant pairing and their relationship had so many ups and downs, mainly due to Syed, being a Muslim and being married to Amira and wanting to keep his family happy, really struggled with his sexuality. It took a very long time for him to except who he was. He had fallen in love with Christian and it was tearing him apart, and this episode, for him, it was just to put on a show, to make his Mum and Dad happy. I think even though he loved Amira in his own way, he could never love her as much as he loved Christian.

I love that the episode started right in the middle of it! If I'm right in thinking the previous episode before this one, Christian and Zainab said the most epic lines to each other, I still remember them to this day:-

Zainab:- "What you people do, it makes me feel sick!"

Christian:- "Well it didn't make him feel sick! Yeah that's right Zainab! Me and your perfect son, we have done it all! And he loved it!" 

I remember watching it and thinking "Oh shit!" because one the biggest secrets was just about to explode! Then just as this huge confrontation between Zainab and Christian is kicking off, he blurts out the words clear as day "Syed is gay!" ... then that slap she walloped on him, I remember watching some kind of interview with the cast around the time, that slap was real and when she started pelting him in the chest, John Partridge told Nina Wadia to really go for it, which she obviously did! Zainab, in later episodes, would really struggle to come to terms with her son's sexuality, I think she very nearly disowned Syed. 

This episode had so much colour to it, all the wonderful outfits for the wedding, I remember being wowed by everything that was being shown on screen! Does anyone else remember the friendship between Denise and Zainab? I don't think Denise has had a friend like her for a very long time. I loved the friendship between Denise and Zainab, it would be lovely for Denise to have someone like that again, I have said many times that they should bring the Masood family back. They were one of EastEnders' brilliant families. Masood, Zainab, Syed, Shabnam and Tamwar. Has anyone else noticed that Shabnam and Syed never actually crossed paths, I feel like it would've been amazing to have seen all the Masood family together, it would've brought so much of a dynamic to the square. Seeing Syed looking so majestic on that horse I feel was a really nice touch, looking like the guy who has everything, when in actual fact he's really hiding who he truly is. When Christian calls him and tells him his Mum knows everything, the pure look of panic in his eyes is so memorable. You can't help but feel for the guy, I know I certainly did! The scene between them when they walk into a separate room has always been one of my favourite scenes. It's so sad because it starts with Syed having to deny that what Christian has told her is true, only because of the fear he is feeling of disappointing everyone around him. She believes him at first and starts to say things like Christian is sick for making up lies and saying he's pathetic for believing he's actually in love with him, all these words she's saying is ripping into Syed and it's tearing him apart hearing his Mother say these things about his lover, the vile words she says about him rips into his heart and he can't bare to hear another word ... "Don't talk about him like that!" ... and then it clicks and she realises it's true. And then he puts her straight, he finally says the words he's been needing to say for a very long time ... "I'm gay Mum and I love him!" It's sad for both parties because Syed is literally crying out to his Mother, trying to make her understand even though she is refusing to accept the fact that her son is gay. He's pleading for her acceptance and Zainab can't seem to come to terms with the news that she's being given, on the day of her son's wedding of all days! She tries to tell him to do what's right and carry on with the wedding and marry Amira, as in time, his feelings for Christian will disappear and he'll grow to love Amira. But you can't tell someone to be who they aren't and live a lie for the rest of their life, it's just giving them a sentence. 

Christian arrives at the ceremony, eager to stop the wedding and to stop Syed making the biggest mistake of his life! I remember feeling very anxious that he would make it in time. Syed is clearly looking lost and a little bit uncomfortable, looking at his Mother as if to say "Do I really need to do this?" again, looking for acceptance! And just as they were saying their vows, Christian walks in the room, looking longingly for the man he loves and praying that its not too late, but as soon as they announce that they are now man and wife, Christian's world falls apart. It must've felt absolutely heartbreaking watching the man you love marry someone else, I felt sorry as Christian had to watch Syed and Amira walk down the stairs as a married couple, while across the hall Zainab knows everything that has gone on between him and her son! I loved also how Jane reacted, she knew her brother was in love with Syed and there was nothing she could do to stop the wedding or stop her brother, it's kind of devastating for all involved. 

Of course, those who don't know about Syed and Christian, are all gushing over how stunning the bride and groom look together. Even Denise mentioned that they'd both make beautiful looking children, which of course was hard for Christian to hear. He has to remove himself from the conversation! Zainab looked at him with daggers as he approached the married couple with Peter, looking at him in fear as if he was going to say something he shouldn't. I remember watching it and desperately not wanting Syed to go through with the wedding, I had every hope that he would do the right thing for himself and go off with Christian ... but as viewers know, it was never going to be that easy! Oh the look of agony between the them both as they finally come face to face with each other after everything that has happened! They are both nearly in floods of tears, desperate to be together and yet they have now been forced apart. I think I genuinely cried watching this when it first aired, the crack in Christian's throat as Syed tries to apologise and he tells him not to be sorry! It's bloody heartbreaking to watch! Even telling him everything is okay, he accepts he had to do what was right for his family, even though it is breaking him, both of them! That final kiss between them, where Christian plans a small kiss on Syed's forehead, it was kinda like the final goodbye. The realisation that they really couldn't be an item properly any more. I remember I sobbed, and then whehn both Syed and Amira were in their wedding carriage about to start their wedded life together, Zainab reminded Syed that everything he is feeling for Christian will fade to nothing! How wrong she would've been! Syed clearly is a broken man at this point, forced to marry someone he doesn't love and to put on a show and put on a happy face to make everyone else happy. 

As those who followed the story will know that Christian and Syed could not keep away from each other, their love was too strong and in time Amira did find out about Syed being gay. That episode was also a brilliant episode! The revelation of Christian and Syed's affair was epic! I remember it so vividly ... there have been many Chryed moments that I still think about to this day! Masood finding out about Syed's sexuality, to then Amira leaving the square after finding out about their affair and leaving with the secret that she was actually pregnant with Syed's baby! Their story carried on for another 2/3 years in which they eventually did have their own wedding and Zainab finally came to accept Syed for who he was and also excepted Christian into their lives. Syed and Christian left the square as a married couple and headed for America to live their lives together. I do always hope and pray that one day they will come back and we can see how much they've grown as a couple! It made me SO happy when Chryed finally got their happy ending, let's just hope the same will happen for Ben and Callum!