#james kirkxreader

Part of the Enterprise’s job was to greet newly joined federation planets, to keep relations on good terms, and to ultimately do what they were told. That’s really how you found yourself in quite the predicament.

Xaxia was a new member of the federation, a little planet settled by human smugglers and traders. They had been very Anti-federation for quite a while and the change of hard took time, a lot of work and now they had finally joined the federation all bad blood put aside. The USS Enterprise, your ship (or rather Captain Kirk’s ship), was assigned to see, speak, and celebrate with the Xaxians (and to make sure everything was in order and there weren’t any federation rules being broken).

“Why do I have to come along? I’m just a nurse, Leonard!” Leonard had accosted you while you’d been working on an ensign’s burn and promptly told you that as your chief medical officer he demanded you go to ground with everyone and take part in the festivities.

“Because you’re getting grumpy.” Sure you were a little grumpy, but only because you kept getting put on long night shifts and for some reason ensigns can’t help but flirt with you when they find out you’re a nurse. It’s frustrating. You’re tired. You miss real food and sleep.

“Like you?”

“Yeah, like me. There can only be one grumpy medical personnel on the ship. That and you need a break, seriously.” Leonard might not ever say it but it was obvious he was concerned for you, as your officer and your friend. You appreciated it but you didn’t want to go to a strange planet to celebrate them joining the federation. You just wanted to sleep.

“Len…”

“The Captain will be there.”

“And?” The truth was you knew exactly why Leonard had brought that up. The Captain despite not knowing you very well always wanted you at things like this and would drag you their himself if he could…that and you might have admitted to finding the man attractive while you were drunk one time. But, that man seriously had eyes that were incomparable. How does anyone get eyes that blue?

“If he notices you’re not there he’ll come and drag you down himself.”

“Jim can be easily persuaded!”

“Not when he has to be there and wants to gawk at you all night.”

“He doesn’t gawk, he looks at me and looks at everyone.” There was no gawking or at least you told yourself there was no gawking. You told yourself that there was absolutely no gawking, that Jim Kirk did not stare at you. That he wasn’t at all attracted to you. He was your captain the two of you barely shared words. You were definitely not his type. Definitely not.

Or you tried to tell yourself that because while there weren’t any serious fraternisation rules, you really didn’t like how anxious you got around him when you even considered the prospect of him being interested.

It wasn’t a bad sort of anxious really, the type that made you a little excited and nervous, but you still found it unsettling to have someone change how you felt so easily.

Suffice to say you agreed to Leonard’s badgering and that’s how you found yourself on a strange planet, with fungus for trees and bright colours, at what was essentially a bonfire. People, Star fleet crew and Xaxians, were dancing round the flames and drinking from cups. You had to admit that it was nice; a warm fire, laughter in the air, real ground beneath your feet. Yeah, it was nice.

It was the sort of atmosphere that had you sitting on the bright pink grass, pulling what were the equivalent of earth daisies from the ground and threading them together. As a child making flower crowns from daises had been an art you had perfected and while you weren’t quite as good as you once had been you still found yourself managing to construct a rather good looking crown.

“Hey.” You looked up to see the captain, scrambling to your feet, “Captain!” You didn’t stand at attention despite the urge to seeing the looking he gave you.

“Call me Jim, please, how many times do I have to tell you?” You knew that he wanted you to call him Jim, but it hadn’t quite set in yet. You still called him the Captain, you still stood at attention, still had those natural instincts and yet part of you didn’t want to have to call him Captain. He was such an informal captain, he cared so much about his crew and you wanted to be just as easy with him as he was with you.

“A million…maybe more.” The two of you stood in silence, you passing the crown of flowers through your hands , and noting that a few of the Xaxians were watching intently, but put it off as the fact that you were talking to the well know and amazing James Tiberius Kirk and not any other factor at all.

Jim glanced over at you, a cup of god knows what in his hands. It was amazing horrible that he looked so good in the firelight, the shadows playing with his features. You hated that you found him so attractive, weren’t superior officers supposed to be old, unattractive men? People you didn’t get distracted by?

“This drink is pretty good…” He held out the cup to you, “Wanna try?” you stared at it for a moment, contemplating the pros and cons of drinking from the same cup as your captain but decided it couldn’t do any harm, right? After all he wasn’t ill and it was only a sip.

“Thanks…” You took the cup from him, fingers brushing against his own before you brought the cup up to your mouth and took a sip. You held the cup away from you, coughing slightly at the strength of the alcohol in cup. “Wow…”

“Not much of a drinker?”

“I mean…that’s strong, Ca- Jim..” You had to take a moment to clear your head, Jim laughing lightly at your reaction before taking the cup back and sipping from it himself. He barely flinched.

You looked down at the crown of flowers in your hand and back at the captain. It was more out of instinct, out of an urge, than a thought out process when you placed the crown on his head. It suited him nicely though, the bright blue of the flowers simply matched his eyes (not that you noticed) and it made him seem soft, not that he wasn’t a soft person but…

You watched Jim look up at the flower crown before smiling at you, “I knew you liked me!” You could feel the embarrassment rushing through you. It was definitely not because you liked him.

“It’s just some flowers!” It wasn’t a marriage proposal for goodness sake it was just some flowers! You barely noticed a few of the Xaxians coming towards you, grins on their faces as if they’d just been witness to some amazing event. Which they had, not that you were aware of that though.

“Flowers mean you like someone. Just admit it. You like me!”

“I-“ You were cut off by a strange voice to your left, “Congratulations!” One of the locals was grinning at you, hands clasped together as they looked between you and Kirk with what almost looked like a loving expression. The type of look your academy roommate used to get when watching romantic films.

“What?”

“You don’t know…?” The woman looked between you two with a look that quickly turned to horror at the thought that you’d maybe done something that you didn’t know you’d done. But she realised rather quickly it fell on her to tell you both what had happened. “You’re married.”

You heard a muffled swear from the other room. You walked in and saw one of Jim’s paper books in pieces. “Jimmy,” you treaded carefully as he just stared at the pile of pages, the cover dangling from his finger tips. “Are you okay? What happened?”

“It, uh, it fell apart,” he looked up into your eyes, his own brown pair brimming with tears.

“Oh Jim,” you sighed, sitting next to him rubbing a hand on his back. “Which one was it?”

“Treasure Island,” your blood ran cold. That was a family heirloom, ever since his great great grandfather. Handed father to son. A small note from each one in the cover of the old paperback. You watched him started to pick up the yellowed wrinkled pages, biting his lip. “It was bound to happen.” He got up moving to throw it out.

“Jim,” you cried out making him stop dead in his tracks, turning to look at you, eyebrows raised. “Come here. Let me fix it.”

“How could you,” he asked, but walking to you anyway. “What can you do? It’s all tattered up.”

You smiled placed your hands over his, looking up into his eyes. “I have my ways. Trust me, James Kirk.” You whispered brushing the hair off his brow.

“I always trust you,” he leaned down and kissed your head.

It took a few weeks but you did it. You managed to bind the book back together. Pages into signatures. And signatures into a book. All the precise measurements, and lacing. The late nights after shift, when Jim was asleep, or at work, working in silence and mystery. But it was all worth it. He was going to have Treasure Island back.

You slid into his office where he was pouring over a report, stylist tapping on the desk. His eyes were knitted together in concentration. “Jim,” you singsonged. You received an hmph. “Jim, I need you to close your eyes and hold out your hands.”

“Y/n, I’m really behind on these reports. I need to make sure everything gets signed off.” He didn’t even look at you.

“James Tiberius Kirk. This will take two minutes! Please. You’ll love it.” you pleaded rocking on the balls of your feet.

He finally glanced up, “two minutes?” you nodded, grinning. He smiled softly closing his eyes and putting out his hands. You gently laid the book in his hands.

Jim opened his eyes slowly and gasped. “Y/N,” he breathed. “You. You fixed it.” He ran his hands over the book opening it so delicately.

His thumb ran over the ink of the note his father left. And then he let out a shuddery laugh as he spotted your note to him. “Jim, let this binding be as secure and tight as my love for you, Y/N.”

He placed the book down and stood up, wrapping you in his strong arms. “Thank you. Thank you so much.” He rocked slowly holding you tightly to him.

“Anything for my Jim.”

“What in this galaxy did I do to deserve you,” he looked at you tears in his eyes. You held his face, ready to wipe his tears. You grinned at him, and he smiled at you leaning in to kiss you.

“Must’ve been something good,” you giggled as he held his lips millimeters from yours, eyes locked to yours.

His warm breath tickled your skin as he chuckled, his eyes crinkled in that beautiful way. “Must have,” he mused pressing his lips to yours in a soft, loving kiss.

You and Jim had been together for a year now, after the accidental marriage, after deciding to stay together you’d done so and it had been great. Old vids on your days off and looking after him when he was reckless. Being brought lunch when you were stuck in med bay. Your relationship had grown from strength to strength. You were ‘happily married’ even if you had been treating it more like dating than marriage. But it had worked.

You had grown closer, learnt more about each other, and even had vid calls with each other’s parents back on Earth. You woke up each morning to sight of James Tiberius Kirk and went to sleep each night to the same. You loved it and you loved him and in your head you contemplated the idea of a proper marriage.

A proper wedding, all that pomp and ceremony…not a random alien marriage without realising you were doing it.

It wasn’t uncommon for you to be called to the bridge, but to be called there and to find everyone else gone was a strange occurrence. It hadn’t been empty since the last stop you’d made to grab supplies and rest for a few days.

“James?” He wasn’t in his chair, but rather standing in the middle of the room, hands behind his back. The smile on his face was one that you’d only ever seen when he had something planned. Whether that something was good or bad only time would tell, but you hated that smile because it meant a surprise that you were probably not prepared for.

“Hey, Moonbeam, light of my life, darling wifey.” It was bad sign when Jim Kirk started listing off more names for you than just Moonbeam.

“I thought I told you to never call me wifey?” You raise an eyebrow at him as you walk closer, coming to stop in front of him with your hands on your hips. You’ve had a long shift and part of you just wanted for him to get it over and done with so you could go get out of your uniform and maybe take advantage of having access to his bath tub. But part of you was filled with a familiar excitement that Jim always seemed to draw from you.

“Yes, you did…but maybe just this once I’m allowed to?” You’re about to ask him what makes him think that, until he’s holding out a little box. A jewellery box. The question dies before it can even be formed by your lips. “Take it…have a look.” It’s a shaky hand of yours that reaches out for it and takes it into your own.

It clicks open to reveal to solid bands of gold, you look up at him. “I figured we could make it official…wedding bands…since we didn’t really have a conventional marriage. I figured we could do all the ceremony and stuff after we get back to earth…I know it is a few years, but family…”

The rings are simply wedding bands but it’s the surprise, the consideration, the meaning that makes them so important. He wants to make this marriage real for the both of you. With Earth traditions. With things that mean something to the both you.

“Oh…James.” You grab his hand pulling him towards you, before taking one of the rings, the one obviously meant for his fingers. You watch the gold band slide onto his left hand and suddenly what happened a year ago feels so much realer.

“I love you.” He takes your ring and does the same to you, the weight is strange and yet reassuring. You suddenly understand why it had never felt real before. Because before there was nothing physical tying the two of you together. It was simply a law, a rule. There was nothing physical about it. Now there’s rings, rings which say you’re a wife and he’s a husband.

“I love you too.”

It’s a few weeks later, and much closer to that federation outpost and your impending decision surrounding you marriage. Jim was back to his usual teasing and vibrant self. He didn’t need you to help him get dressed anymore, and despite the awkwardness that had prevailed during those days of looking after him it did bring the two of you closer.

All in all life with Jim and life on the Enterprise was returning to a sort of normalcy after everything that had happened. Normalcy for you wasn’t necessarily normal, but it was growing increasingly domestic. You’d spent a great deal of your time being a doting nurse and fitting a terrible stereotypical wife. After healing, however, roles had begun to reverse.

Jim would bring lunch to you if you were stuck in the med bay because of an emergency, he would make the bed and change the sheets. He would do laundry and clean rather than letting you do it. He would ask you if you needed anything. He had started to become a doting husband figure and it was entirely too strange.

Everyone, even the captain, had certain days off from work. Despite all odds, and most likely due to some sort of interference from Jim, the two of you had the same day off each week…although on a space ship the weeks didn’t really seem to have days anymore. It was strange, how you could go from knowing the days and whether it was morning or night to simply accepting that everything blurred into one.

“James, I need to go do the laundry!” You were currently being held hostage by your captain in a very warm bed. With the weeks came a sort of friendship and comfort around each other that meant Jim was all the more teasing and all the more tactile. Hence the arms right around your waist, and the legs keeping you from moving away despite every attempt to get up and out of that bed.

“Moonbeam it’s our day off…can’t we just watch old vids and eat replicator popcorn?” It was incredibly tempting especially because the bed was arm and Jim was warm and he was doing that whiney begging voice. The one you were sure barely anyone had ever heard but that was really hard to resist.

“Ugh…fine.”

You found yourself no longer struggling allowing yourself to be drawn back full into the bed and wondered how you’d reached this point. How you’d fallen for your captain after accidentally marrying him, to the point that you could barely disagree with him on some points? How had you gotten this attached this quickly? How come you feared the possibility of a divorce and no longer being around him anymore?

You weren’t actually sure you could sleep on your own anymore. There was a routine in sleeping in the same bed with someone, the taking turns to get changed for the evening, the conversations about your days, the warmth of another person, the reassurance that you weren’t alone, the sound of their breathing and the way the felt when you cuddled up next to them. You weren’t entirely sure you’d be able to sleep if the two of you parted ways.

You snuggled back into the warm covers and followed Jim with your eyes as he got up and pottered about, replicating popcorn and all sorts of sweets (more than you thought possible, obviously Scotty had been improving the replicators), before searching what you could only assume was his own personal archive of movies that he’d stored on his PADD. You knew that Jim, much like yourself, enjoyed classical music, musical from a few centuries back, and you assumed that his taste in vids was much the same.

It was hilarious just watching him attempt to sort out a bigger display, he wasn’t an engineer or a technician and it was messy and it took about 5 attempts to get sound and 3 attempts to get a picture, but he succeeded in the end.

“What’s your poison, Moonbeam? Horror? Romantic Comedies? Fantasy?”

“Anything, but horror, we deal with enough terrifying shit every day.”

“Sci-fi horror is definitely off the table.”

The best thing, you decided, about Jim was that he made decisions and he made them quickly. You’d in the past struggled to watch movies with people with neither of you being able to make a decision about what to watch, but Jim wasn’t like that. He listened to what you did or did not want to watch genre wise and then made a decision based on that.

“So what even is this?” You asked as he brought the replicated snacks over the bed, before curl under the covers again himself.

“Dogfight.”

“What’s it about?” You took a handful of popcorn before pressing against Jim’s side, shoulder to shoulder. It was obviously an old movie, perhaps 20th century? Maybe 21st? But in your experience there was something enjoyably bad about those movies, the limitations and what people made with them, the lack of knowledge about space and science was also quite funny. The assumptions people always seemed to make about the future that never quite panned out, but sometimes got close.

“This marine and this girl and you’ll just have to watch.”

You had never imagined that you’d be watching an old movie in bed with James Tiberius Kirk when you were in the academy or even when you’d first joined the Enterprise. Not only did it seem too domestic for Jim, the Jim you had heard about back then, but the thought that it would be you in that situation seemed so utterly bizarre.

“If he likes her why won’t he accept it? Why does he hurt her?”

“Because wife of mine, he’s a dick and he needs to go through some stuff and grow up…”

“Is there a happy ending?” You look up at Jim, taking his attention away from the screen to look at you.

“You’ll just have to wait and see.” He gives you that teasing grin before turning back to the vid and you think that maybe waiting and seeing applies to your situation too. Maybe worrying about how Jim feels and what decision he wants to make in the next few days when you finally hit that federation outpost is ridiculous. Maybe it’s just about waiting and seeing because things can change in the blink of an eye. You know how you feel.

You know that you want to remain married, treating it more as a budding relationship than a marriage. You know that you want to continue sharing quarters and waking up to him. You want to keep this routine you’ve gotten, the sharing of responsibilities, the lunches, the coming back after a long shift to another person.

You know you can’t guarantee he feels the same. While you feel romantic feelings deep in your gut, Jim could simply want to be your friend and if that is the way it is there’s nothing you can do, but accept it and let it happen. If he wants a divorce who are you to stop him?

Wait and see was very fitting you decided.

“What do you want to watch now?”

When you didn’t answer Jim looked down at you realising that you had fallen asleep. The warmth of the bed, the soothing nature of being curled up with another person had led to you slumbering against him, cheek pressed against his shoulder, mouth open just so as you breathed evenly.

He settled down further into the bed, carefully pulling you against him before reaching for the tiny control and selecting another movie. He had to admit…that prospect of not being married to you anymore upset him. He just hoped you felt the same way. He wanted to explore your relationship more. He wanted you around. He could feel the deep well of affection for you in his chest whenever he even thought of you.

“You’re telling us that this is legally binding! Spock, there has to be some…some loophole!” After the surprise of finding out you might be married everyone was hastily shoved back to the Enterprise and you now found yourself sitting down, head in your hands while your captain paced across the floor. Spock was of no help because apparently there was no help to be had. Which was just…great.

“Xaxia is a federation planet, their legal system mixes with ours, their legal marriages are our legal marriages. I’m sorry, Jim, but you’re married. Legally and in most places.” Part of you isn’t sure how you feel. You don’t know your captain well, you aren’t even friends and now your married and there are so many regulations and rules around that.

Your first thought is that he’s not the worst person to be accidentally married to, but that doesn’t mean that either of you want to be married does it? While he might not be quiet the man he was when you were both in the Academy together, that didn’t mean he had any desire for marriage. Marriage a serious commitment. Usually between people who love each other. You certainly don’t love each other.

“Spock…can you leave us for a second?” You look up and watch Spock leave the ready room. Jim walks towards you and crouches in front of you. He doesn’t look mad, he looks like he’s concerned that you might pass out and you suppose that’s what’s always made him such a good captain. He cares about others before himself a lot.

“Hey…so we could get a divorce if you want? But…I was wondering if we could make a go of it? We can’t divorce until we hit a federation outpost anyway…and I know this wasn’t planned and I know we’re not close, but I..” You can tell how hard it is for him to say any of it and you reach out and put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

“You can tell me…we’re married now.” You try to smile at your own poor attempt at humour. Marriage was a big deal for you it always had been. Marriage had always seemed so solid, so concrete and so unbreakable and even though you and Jim didn’t really know each other the idea of breaking it didn’t quite sit well with you. But at the same time you were freaking out. You were married to your captain. This was not planned. This was not the fairy tale wedding people talked about, it wasn’t about love it was an accident with a fucking flower crown and some stupid alcohol that you didn’t even like!

“I like you…maybe not in a marriage sense quite yet but I do like you and I want to…see how it goes?” It’s not conventional that’s your first thought, but either way you’re going to be married until you can reach the next federation outpost anyway…maybe it’s worth trying, who knows how it could turn out.

“There are rules aren’t there? About living quarters and…that sort of thing I never…never thought I’d need to know them.” It’s your way of saying that you’d like to give it a go…that you found him attractive and maybe…maybe this would work out. But you didn’t know and you certainly didn’t want to bet on it in case it didn’t. Especially considering this was new territory for you both.

Maybe it would be different if you’d known each other well beforehand, but you hadn’t. You’d admired him from afar as a captain and as an attractive human being, even in the Academy you’d found yourself admiring him. Even if he had been more a dick back then than he was now. He’d grown up quite a bit.

“There are…I’d have to look them up. It’s not I, we, planned for this…are you sure about this? I know it’s asking a lot of you to give this a shot and I…I don’t want you to do it because you think you have to.”

“You might be my captain, but you could never get me to do this if I didn’t want to.”

From there the two of you had hunted down Spoke and sat around looking up the regulations surrounding married Starfleet couples. Starfleet had more rules then you thought but the main ones seemed to be that you couldn’t be unprofessional during working hours, that because of that spouses had to share the quarters of the higher ranking crew member so that couples had time together outside of working hours. It was an attempt to keep ‘fraternisation’ at a minimum while work was being conducted. Other than that the rules were rules that most people on the Enterprise would probably ignore anyway. Things like couples counselling with CMO and regular check ups at medical. The most important ones seemed to simply be about accommodation.

You had to share Kirk’s quarters. You weren’t allowed to have your own and as much as you knew Jim would bend the rules to make you more comfortable you wanted to do this properly. You wanted to see where this would go and that wouldn’t happen if the two of you ignored each other every day.

“You know you can stay in your own quarters right…I’m captain I can bend a few rules for my wife” Wife is said with a bit of teasing smile, an attempt at making light of the true severity of what the two of you had done, but you appreciate it.

“As long as you promise not to ravish me in the night I think I can handle sharing quarters.” You find yourself winking at him and joking along as you type in the code to your room or what used to be your room. It’s nice to relax a little…to joke with him. Not to be worried because he’s the captain or be worried because you just got accidentally married less than 3 hours ago.

“You just want my bath tub.” It was a fact that the Captain’s quarters had a shower and a bath tub something no one else had access too. It was certainly a perk of being accidentally married to the Captain.

“Oh, Captain, you figured it out! This was my plan all along!” You’re stuffing the little clothes and items you’ve collected into a few bags. You don’t have much, most of your things are back on Earth in storage waiting for you to come home. There was no point bringing too much with you on the 5 year mission, mostly because there simply was the space. All your things fit into 2 bags.

It was strange to think that this wasn’t your room anymore that the bed wasn’t yours, the shower wasn’t either. That you’d no longer be spending your evenings here, but somewhere else. With someone else.

“Are you sure?”

“Jim. I’m sure.” You know he’s simply concerned but it’s more than a little annoying. The annoyance does dissipate, however, when he takes the bags from you despite your protest and begins walking you to your now shared quarters. His quarters. Your quarters.

Ensigns, commanders and everyone in between stare at the two of you as you walk past. Everyone knows, most likely through the grapevine of gossip that was the enterprise, but it’s unnerving to have so many strange people stare at you when previously no one did.

You try to ignore it, walking side by side with Jim until you come to a door. You’ll have to learn a whole new code you think as you watch his fingers type out a code he is so familiar with. You make a note of it and play the numbers over in your head again and again and again. You don’t want to forget it. You need to get into this place now, it’s your new home away from home.

God, how are you going to tell your family? Should you tell them? What if it doesn’t work out? Maybe you should wait…

“This is…home…” You come back to the present when Jim puts your bags own, and turns to you with arms open wide gesturing at the room around you two.

A big bed, bigger than yours, big enough for two people and room between…a desk and computer screen, a sofa off to the side. A door inside the room you presume leads to a bath room. It’s by no means a luxury room, it’s nothing like an apartment on Earth, but it is better than what you’ve been living in considering his rank. He was the captain after all.

Jim clears out a space for your things in his wardrobe and in his drawers, it reminds you of those times back on Earth where your relationships would grow serious and you’d slowly move little bits into their house. Except this is already serious and it’s all your things. Your underwear next to his, you uniforms next to his, your boots next to his. It’s odd the mix of blue and gold.

“My wardrobe looks like some sort of 21st century nightclub.”

“I’m not going to lie I’m not sure if I like the colour combination, Captain. You might need to get a blue shirt now.” You sat down on his your shared bed, watching him stare at the uniforms. Maybe if it was mixed it would look better rather than one block of gold and one block of blue? Oddly enough the more you stared at it the fonder you became of the colours.

“Or you could get gold?”

“I’d look terrible in gold.” You wouldn’t, but it was funny to watch him turn on you in disbelief. It was like you’d just told him Santa Clause never existed or that no one listened to 21st century music anymore. It was sweet in a way just how offended he seemed for you at the prospect you’d ever look bad, it was a bit of boost to your confidence strangely.

“I don’t think you could look terrible in anything.” It serious, the captain voice had come out, the one that said don’t argue with me because you’ll never win.

“Aww, Captain!”

“Are you calling me captain to annoy me or are you refusing to call me Jim?” The smirk started to pull at his lips, the one that was so infamous when you were both just cadets so many years ago now. Everything about him was infamous back them; the blue of his eyes, the movement of his hips, the taste of his kiss, the smile, the hair. You couldn’t go anywhere on campus without overhearing someone talking about James Tiberius Kirk and his talent in the bed room.

“What if I call you James?” You were sure barely anyone called him James anymore, other than perhaps those reading his official name back to him. You quite liked the thought of calling him something no one else on the ship did. James was a nice name. Classic. Traditional. Some people might call it boring but then the man himself was definitely not boring.

“It’s slightly better than captain seeing as your my new wifey.” In fact he rather liked the way it sounded from you, not that he’d ever admit that. After all it was a bit soon after a surprise marriage to start fawning over you…right? Even if he’d had an interest in you from afar before strange marriages had struck him and you.  

“Wifey?” You brought your fingers up to imitate air quotations at the most ridiculous alternative to wife you’d heard. It was somehow worse than those couples that called each other boo bear and sugar muffin puffin or whatever they called each other.

“Not a fan?”

“Maybe stick to something else, James…” He’s leaning against his desk, hands back on the top of it watching you with that smile. The one you know is incredibly dangerous. The one that has made the strongest of people go giddy. It had to be some sort of charm of his, maybe he wasn’t even human? Maybe James Kirk was half human, half some mysterious race that were naturally charming to the point no one could really resist that smile?

“Alright, honey”

“Are you intending to make me divorce you?” This sort of relaxed banter is strange to have with the Captain of all people, but it’s nice. It’s nice to smile and laugh and enjoy his company. It helps put the weight of the situation to the back of your mind for the moment, the way he makes light of it, the way you make light of it.

“I’m trying to be sweet!” The old Kirk shines through sometimes you noticed, but he’s slightly different now. Captaincy had mellowed him out, made him more serious…but he still had that old streak through him. Still teased and flirted and laughed. He was still beautiful. You were older too though, no longer the girl bashful from simply looking at Jim Kirk in Xenoanthropology or too scared to talk to your new captain because of an old interest when you were younger. You’re wiser and older and being able to laugh with him is perhaps one of the best developments of growing up.

“The infamous James Tiberius Kirk, sweet?”

“Sometimes I forget we were in the academy together…you know I’m not that bad, right? So what I had sex a few times, I’m a good guy!”

“I know.”

“You were joking?”

“I was joking. Besides so what if you had consensual sex with half the academy population? It’s not like you broke any real hearts…people knew it was just sex.” The one thing that different James Kirk from the other ladies men of the academy was that he was very clear that it was just sex with him and that if someone wanted more…they wouldn’t get it. Gaila was perhaps the only one you remember getting attached to him, they had a brief but longer than typical for Kirk, sexual relationship in which she got a little attached. You had been a sort of friend and had to listen to her talk about him. But she took the ending of it well…she didn’t kill him. But the general rule was that people went to Jim if they wanted a one-night, no strings attached dalliance.

“You were the half I never slept with.”

“I’d like to say I’d remember if we ever had sex so yes, James, you never slept with me and that’s probably a good thing considering our current predicament.” You couldn’t imagine how uncomfortable it could be to accidentally marry an old one-night stand, to be forced together. At least you and Jim had very little previous interaction with each other. You could make your own opinions of each other up.

“Can you imagine? Married to a one-night stand from the Academy?”

“I didn’t have enough for the odds to be in favour of marrying a one-night stand, James.” You hadn’t really slept with lots of people at the academy, you’d dated a few people, had a few little flings here and there, but in general you’d be content with friendships and yourself. Or maybe you told yourself that you were content with that and with unrequited crushes.

“Are you saying I slept with so many people that it was actually probable?” The two of you continued to chat for a while, witty talk putting off the inevitable serious conversation about marriage, life, living together until reaching a federation outpost and then the inevitable discussion as to whether you wanted to stay married or get a divorce. Maybe it would go well and you’d decide to stay married longer or maybe it would be a horrendous experience ending in your transfer to a different ship.

The two of you were lying back on the bed side by side hours later. The bed felt comfier than yours but you weren’t sure if you’d just imagined that.

“You know what I miss?”

“What?”

“The moon, our moon. I miss moonlight filtering in through my window. I miss when it was bright and full. I loved the moon growing up. There was always something so mystical about it.” You turn your head towards him as you talk. Your mind’s eyes imagining the moon, your moon. Not all these strange moons around different planets in different systems. But The Moon. The piece rock songs have been sung about and myths have been written for.

“The moons pretty great…”

“Yeah…” You felt the exhaustion of a long day of ups and downs and accidental marriages finally hit you. Watching him with heavy eyes and the desire to get in your pajamas (that are definitely not the boring ones they give you) and go to sleep.

“Alright, time for bed, Moonbeam.” You watch him sit up and grab a pillow starting towards the sofa in the corner of the room.

“What are you doing?” You’re too tired to question the new name, but not too tired to question why he’s not sleeping in his bed and why he’s going towards the sofa. You sit up to grab his arm as he moves towards the sofa, stopping him from moving any further.

“I’m giving you the bed…?”

“You take the bed, it’s your bed, and I’ll take the sofa.” You move to sit up and get off the bed, but find Jim in front of you, arms crossed. “You’re taking the bed.” You’re not surprised he’s fighting you on this, but it’s the most frustrating thing. It was his room first he got the bed, also he was captain, surely the captain needed to be well rested?

“James…why don’t we just share? I won’t sleep if you’re on the sofa, I’ll feel bad.” You’d toss and turn and worry over it all night and that was the last thing you needed after the most bizarre day of your life.

“I just…I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable.” It’s sweet that he’s considering how you might feel about sharing a bed with your captain, but you’re too tired to care about it and you’re both adults. It’s not like you’re adolescents. You can share a bed and not make it weird.

“The only thing that’ll make me uncomfortable is you on that sofa.” You watch him relent and place the pillow back where it belonged on the bed.