#jam.exe

summary: immediately imprisoned as a smeet for being too short, jam was assigned as prisoner #425 and sent to planet vort. a mishap in her smeet capsule left her underdeveloped, extremely small, and jiggly. she spends her adolescence in a vort prison, undergoing relentless cruelty by the other prisoners. being completely naive, she interprets this cruelty as acts of friendship, since prison is (literally) all she knows. because of this, she’s overly friendly and happy, much to the annoyance of the other prisoners.

due to jam’s clumsiness, she accidentally blows up the prison while on cafeteria duty. the prison is almost entirely destroyed, almost every single prisoner blown up or injured. miraculously, jam survives with a damaged pak and parts of her face scorched off. one of her eyes also gets incinerated in the explosion. 

on the brink of death, jam has to take drastic measures to keep her pak from shutting down. with only a handful of minutes to spare, she finds a deceased irken prisoner and takes some of their skin, as well as one of their eyes to fix herself. most importantly, she takes parts of the irken prisoner’s pak in order to fix hers, essentially saving her life. before she’s noticed, she escapes the prison, which sets her free.

jam steals a spittle runner before ultimately realizing she has no idea how to fly a spacecraft. she crashes the runner into irk, where she desperately tries to assimilate into irken life. in order to serve her empire, she works as a service drone for the almighty tallest, taking on the name jam.

however, not having any knowledge or experience quickly leads her to stand out. she is constantly making mistakes. whether that be serving someone a cup full of liquified metal, or almost burning the massive to the ground, her destructive tendencies cause her to be loathed by the tallest.

in an attempt to get rid of her, the tallest decide to send jam to earth, where zim is currently on his “mission” to destroy earth. they send her there under the guise that zim is an irken on a secret assignment, a very important individual.of course, jam is just happy to be useful to her leaders. she gladly accepts, immediately getting stuffed into a packaging box and shot out of a cannon towards earth. she begins her reign of terror with zim shortly after landing on earth.

the first day that she meets zim, she’s determined to prove that she’ll be a good henchman for him. taking matters into her own hands, jam decides to engulf the world in flames, does some grocery shopping, and makes zim a nice meal all within the span of three hours.

although she expected zim to be happy about moving on from earth and onto the next planet, he’s furious. after all, it’s zim’s earth to conquer, not jam’s. and it’s also really hot outside now.

the world ultimately does not get conquered that day, jam eventually putting out the fires. jam figures zim is spending time devising the ultimate plan for humanity’s destruction, and patiently waits for whenever he’s ready for earth’s demise.

personality: jam is a cheerful irken, just to the point of it being a smidgen obnoxious. she’s extremely naive, and overly trusting. her sunny personality has never served her well.

she has a hard time recognizing perilous situations, since she was constantly in danger in her adolescence. because of this, she tends to not get scared easily. she’ll gladly smile at a monster about to chew her head off.

despite this, she’s rather intelligent. she simply doesn’t recognize the gravity of most situations.

she loves fire and explosions, and is constantly building weapons and equipment centered around setting things on fire. it’s to the point where she installed a mini flamethrower onto her pak. definitely a pyromaniac.

jam is additionally very cluelessly destructive. she innately knows how to destroy almost everything she touches. although, compared to zim, her ability to destroy is on a much smaller level. while zim causes planetary levels of destruction, jam tends to just occasionally vaporize a building or two.

that being said, her ability to conquer other planets seems to be higher than zim’s, as she was able to almost conquer earth within 3 hours of being there.

it is unknown whether or not she's a defective, due to her destructive tendencies and her very charismatic nature. 

appearance: jam is an extremely small irken, even shorter than zim. she has an octagon shaped head (similar to a stop sign), one oval shaped eye, and one circular eye. before the explosion on planet vort, both of her eyes were circular. for her antennas, she has one straight and one curled. 

there are stitches that go down the front of her face, around her eyes. four stitches on the left, three on the right. the sides of her face have little hair spikes. additionally, her skin is a pale green in the middle of her face, but a darker green for the remainder of her head.  her clothing and eyes are a light plum color, slightly more purple than zim. she also wears a pink bow on her chest. in her human disguise, she has short brown hair with a plum colored streak. her contacts are brown.

relationships:

zim: zim and jam are partners in crime. well, at least according to jam. in reality, zim usually just tolerates her. nonetheless, jam and zim amplify each other’s destructive tendencies. as time goes on, they do develop a camaraderie with each other. though it’s rare, zim will show moments where he truly, genuinely cares for jam. jam completely admires zim, absolutely believing that zim is an extremely important irken. additionally, due to constant mistreatment in her life, zim is much more “kind” to her than most individuals have been. unlike the individuals she’s met, zim doesn’t spit in her face, or push her around. best of all, zim doesn’t make her wear a table on her head. jam tries to show her appreciation for zim by being a loyal follower to him, usually never questioning him or his methods. from her perspective, zim is much smarter and far more superior than her, so she has no reason to go against him. to go against zim would be to go against the irken empire, and she doesn’t want to be restricted by prison life again.

gir: jam absolutely adores gir. their personalities are somewhat similar, though gir tends to be more unpredictable, sillier, and less competent than jam. nonetheless, jam loves gir, and takes care of him. she takes him on walks in his doggy disguise and makes him all sorts of irken snacks and sweets. she even brings him suck munkeys despite the liquid burning her skin whenever she comes into contact with it. it is unknown whether gir likes jam or not, especially with how indescribable gir’s personality and actions can be. 

dib: dib doesn’t see jam that much as a threat, noting that she seemed more clusmy and less competent than zim. he sees jam as another one of zim’s henchmen that stand in his way to protect earth. for jam, dib is simply another human that stands in the way of zim’s conquering of earth. jam and dib first meet when zim sends jam on a mission to annihilate dib. breaking into his house, jam finds dib sitting on his couch watching tv and eating chinese food. before she’s about to scorch dib alive, she takes a look at the tv to find that mysterious mysteries is airing a segment on vampire alien hybrids. jam gets distracted by the tv, telling dib that the information on his tv is incorrect. vampire alien hybrids are actually pretty laid back, and feed on liquid sugar, not human blood. dib takes this opportunity to deescalate the situation by distracting jam even more. they both spend a moment talking about these vampire aliens, until dib offers jam some of his chinese food. jam, not knowing the dangers of human food yet, takes a piece. immediately, she’s sick. she has to retreat back to the base to a dissatisfied zim, claiming that dib’s tactics were too clever for her.

gaz: gaz and jam don’t really interact much, so their relationship is very limited. jam does get distracted by gaz’s various video games, watching her play her game within proximity of gaz. (last time she got too close, gaz sprayed her with soda.) jam likes all the colors and lights that emit from the screen. gaz thinks everyone is stupid, and jam is no exception. like dib, she sees jam as less than a threat than zim.

hoomans: jam learns alot about humans from zim, which ultimately skews her perspective on them. she has little to no empathy for humans, and is equally as disgusted by them and their practices as zim is. 

little facts:

since jam was imprisoned after being born, she did not receive the whole of irken knowledge. most of what she knows is self taught.

jam is generally weaker than most irkens, due to her size and being underdeveloped.

jam does not have spider legs like some irkens do. most of the weapons and equipment on her pak are very unconventional for an irken, since she customized them herself.

when she arrives on earth, jam becomes obsessed with techno music. it’s common for her to be dancing with gir at 4am, the whole base shaking from the music’s bass. zim hates it.

jam usually has a lot of spare time on her hands, as well as an innate curiosity, leading her to get into all sorts of mishaps. whenever zim calls her, it’s a complete guess as to what she could be doing. she could be stranded somewhere in the ocean, surrounded by cybernetic sharks, or she could be spending an afternoon harvesting tree sap in order to test its flammability. or she could be on fire. which is very common.