Rant Time!!
ok so I don't normally rant on here, I fact I never have but I really need to get this out and I don't have anywhere else to put it. sorry if this is all over the place I am just typing and not thinking. • • • • • ok so I keep getting crippling anxiety over stupid little things that come from relationships and it's killing me. I don't understand how people can talk about cheating in such a light way when it has hurt them so badly. I have been cheated on one too many times and it fucking hurts because it just means they didn't love you in the first place even when they told you they did. I fucking am hurt from all of this and it has started eating away at me and I'm getting scared at this point. I'm afraid something bad will happen to me because I'm too dependant on relationships. I feel unloved and lonely even if people care for me I don't feel as if I have that connection. I hate myself for this often, I shouldn't be dependant but I am. and the lack of having these stable relationships is just hurting me a lot. and I can't stop thinking about it even though I should be asleep cause it's 1:20 am and I went to bed hours ago. I'm scared and I feel alone and deprived of something humans do naturally depend on, love. and I don't know what's going to happen next..
