#jaegerbombr

Bon appétit <3 

People could change. It was something that he had heard more than multiple times throughout his life. No one was the same person as they were at different stages of their life, right? Elias tried to think about what he was like when he was younger — A bit harder to do with the state of the world for the past six or so years. He doubted that there was anyone who did not change drastically every couple of months because of that. 

A quiet hum came from the other end of the bed as Elias kept his eyes on the bunk above them. It was normal for him to spend the quite a large portion of his time in the Beckets room. It seemed that whenever he was not with his own co-pilot, he was with the brothers. Bouncing between the two like he couldn’t decide who he liked to spend his time with more. Dark eyes finally glanced away to look toward where Yancy was sat at the desk. 

The only thing that had kept Elias from some biting remark, teeth bared in a snarl was the fact that it was Yancy that approached him. He could scare off almost everyone at the Shatterdome. Shake off whatever scolding comments were thrown his way by Pentecost or Hansen about his actions. Maybe he would have gotten into a fight with them, too. There was no reason that he had to respect them when he was no longer part of the PPDC — Especially not when they had come looking for him and asked for him back. Even if they were desperate. In an unsurprising turn of events, the Beckets were the only ones that Elias would soften around. Far less than he used to. Some people would barely call it ‘softening’ if they saw it but it was there. The familiar fondness for the Beckets, specifically Yancy. 

Like the entire quick to anger, dangerous personality that Elias had developed would simply deflate as soon as he saw Yancy or Raleigh. (Another thing that was unsurprising. Given the fact that he had known the pair for years, since the academy, and bonded with them when they were still young and hopeful). Maybe people had started to recognize the fact that Elias seemed to loose the majority of the fight in him once Yancy was around. It would not be that surprising if someone, whether it be Pentecost or anyone else, tried to use that to their advantage. 

“It doesn’t matter. I don’t take orders from anyone here.”

For half a second, he paused as he considered the other man. An attempt to see if the words were genuine and if he needed to worry about how Yancy felt — When it came to the Beckets, he was always quick to switch to concern when it was needed. They were the only people that he cared about in the entire Shatterdome, after all. Not to mention the fact that having a sick pilot around was bad. Especially when they had no idea when the next Kaiju would crawl out from the bottom of the ocean. 

“You don’t look sick,” he said idly with a tilt of his head. Part of him wanted to continue to tease Yancy over his supposed flustered state and what could possibly bring him to such a state. Joking around with and teasing the Becket brothers was his favorite past time, after all. But he also had to make sure that the other man was okay. Out of worry for if they needed him to pilot Lady, not due to any genuine concern. 

“Right.” 

There were a lot of things that Elias regretted from his life. The impending end of the world forced him to think about everything that he had done over the course of his life — How he had fucked it all up as his life went on. He could not think of anything that he had done within the last half of a decade that he was proud of. Once he had left the PPDC, there was nothing good that he had done with his life. What was the point when you knew that you were going to die within the next couple of years?

A soft snort escaped him as he cast a glance toward Yancy as they continued down the corridor. There were a lot of things that he should tell the other. After all, it was probably the last time that he would be able to get things off of his chest. To admit to things that he had held in for literal years at that point. 

How does it feel catching up with a ghost? Elias did not know exactly what he said after he processed what he had been looking at. Who it was and that it wasn’t just some weird dream of hallucination. He was good at hiding things, at least, so the slightly anxious feeling in his chest went ignored. The small sense of awkwardness that he felt because he had no idea how or where to start. It must have been Yancy who suggested that they drink and catch up. Right? The only thing that Elias had enough mind for was to bring his own alcohol — The sort that would get them wasted quicker, a lot better than whatever the Shatterdome provided them.

Sat out in the hangar, the groan of metal around them and the steady footsteps of J-techs working? It was almost enough to make him feel like the old times. The times where they were both young and stupid — Mostly unmarked by the horrors of the war that they were fighting. At least compared to how they both were now.

The words, though, were enough to pull him back for a second. Bring him back to pacing outside of the medic bay, struggling to breath and unable to process anything that he was feeling. There had been so much blood. And the feeling of being connected to Zeke when it happened… It brought him back to the the rush that happened after Knifehead. The time that he had no idea what happened and spent the entire night worrying that it would be another Zeke situation. (And it was). Both memories were things that he had ignored for literal years.

Simply pushing it down and ignoring it. You couldn’t be forced to deal with your trauma and grief if you never acknowledged it, right?

Except now Yancy was bringing it up. The fact that you could never really escape those memories and experiences no matter how ‘okay’ you were. (Even if saying that Elias had been okay for all those years was a bit of a stretch). It felt strange to just try and brush it off. For half a second, Elias wondered if Yancy would accept them or if he would continue to talk about it. Possibly press Elias about things. One of the things that he remembered about the oldest Becket was how easy it was for Yancy to make him talk about everything.

Scrubbing the heel of his palm against his eye, the man let out a long sigh before taking a sip of his own drink. The expression and the way that he held himself didn’t really change. But, if you looked close enough, you could see how tired he was. The exhaustion that cling to his bones every time he moved. “That’s how shit like that works.” He took another sip of his drink — Hoping for the buzz of alcohol to soothe his mind.

Elias glanced beside him where Yancy sat and fell silent. Simply taking in the man’s features again as if he didn’t have his face memorized. “You can’t really escape it in a place like this, anyway-“ A half-assed wave toward the metal that surrounded them. “Got me wondering why you even came back,” he said, trying to sound casual. Every fiber of his being was against the idea of being vulnerable and yet he still felt like Yancy brought that side out in him. “You died, Yance.”