i’m being so brave about not being a little shit and just picking “the”. i’m gonna go with laugh
You can always be a little shit with me lol. This is from Ellie's second day of school in Jackson:
Ellie flipped through her book, getting pulled into the world of superpowers and dramatic speeches from bad guys.
Sometimes a rise of laughter would come from Jesse’s group across the room. Their hands flew as they spoke, smiles wide and bright across their faces.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
a/n: Prompt (bold font) from @writing-challenges-and-prompts. barbed wire/support divider made by @benkeibear. I am late with this fic (honestly should have been posted last year) but HAPPY BIRTHDAY JACKSON (a day late lol)!!!
The house is quiet, the scent of food is nonexistent and Jackson raises an eyebrow. He has half a mind to call out for you but he chooses not to. Shutting the front door behind himself, Jackson locks the door and walks into the kitchen. You are standing in front of the stove, there is no music playing nor pots in the sink. Shaking his head, Jackson goes over to his liquor cabinet and pours himself half a glass of whiskey. He takes a long sip and lets the amber liquid settle on his tongue before he swallows.
Holding the glass in his hand, Jackson makes his way to the living room and he hears your soft snores. Peeking over the couch, Jackson watches as you sleep peacefully and his grip on the glass tightens. He watches you for a moment longer, enjoying the sight of your beast as they rise and fall, the softness of your skin as it glitters in the low lighting and how sweet you look. He wonders what you are dreaming about as you sleep on your side with one hand cradling your stomach.
That makes Jackson’s jaw tick and he sighs before he walks around the couch and sets his drink down on the coffee table. Squatting down in front of you, Jackson reaches out and tucks one of your braids behind your ear before he traces the contours of your face. His fingertips glide across your skin, and linger at your plush lips. There is a clear shine to them, a lip gloss or maybe more like a balm makes Jackson want to have a taste.
Slowly, he leans in and presses his lips to yours. Vanilla. It makes Jackson’s mouth water and he kisses you again and again…and again until you start to emerge from your slumber. You moan softly against Jackson’s lips and he smiles into the kiss, nuzzling his nose against yours as your eyes flutter open.
The easy and carefree look is snuffed out the moment the reality of the situation breaks through the sleeping fog in your mind. You pull away with a sharp inhale and Jackson clicks his tongue but chooses not to speak on it.
“Have you eaten, Daisy?” He asks as he helps you sit up. Your stomach is getting larger and it is harder to hide it. You look beautiful pregnant but it still rubs Jackson the wrong way that the baby isn’t his. Will you love the bastard child more than him?
“Daisy?” Jackson reaches out to touch your stomach and you quickly wrap your arms protectively around it, blocking his hands. He sighs and licks his lips, “You’re not being very nice,” he glances up at your face and smiles. “I just want to say hello to the little one.”
“Please…don’t.”
Jackson frowns at your request. Why are you so afraid of him? He loves you. Isn’t that enough? He cocks his head to the side and watches as you try to make yourself smaller, pushing yourself farther into the couch and he frowns.
“Y/N?”
Your eyes jump from his hands to his face and he slowly cups the side of your cheek, his thumb rough as he strokes the skin.
“I think it’s time to end this little game,” Jackson’s voice is soft as he speaks and your breath hitches as his hand slowly trails down to your throat. “Let’s get rid of it, Daisy.”
“N-No!” You cry, eyes wide as he stares down at your protruding stomach. You tighten your hold around your stomach and Jackson’s frown deepens.
Jackson’s fingers squeeze around your neck and he licks his lips. His eyes are dark, almost black and as he leans in, your noses press together as he speaks lowly.
“No?” He chuckles flatly and smashes his lips into yours.
Tears burn your eyes as you remove your hands from your stomach and press them against his chest. You push and push, trying to get Jackson away from you but it only seems to upset him. The kiss became harsher, full of teeth and tongue.
“P-Please stop?” You beg and Jackson tears himself away with a growl.
“Stop?! Stop…all you say is stop!!” Jackson’s chest heaves as he glares down at your stomach. “Why should I!?”
“You’re scaring me!” You cry and Jackson laughs, his eyes are wild as he rakes a hand through his messy hair.
“You’re always scared.”
“And who’s fault is that?!”
Your eyes widen as you scream at Jackson and before he can respond, you push past him and run up the steps.
Jackson watches as you disappear up the steps to your room. Your ass looks amazing in the olive sundress you are wearing and it makes heat curl in his stomach. From his spot, knelt on the floor, Jackson licks his lips (the taste of you still on his tongue) and stands to his full height. He grabs his glass of whiskey from the table and sips it slowly. He rolls his tongue in his mouth as vanilla and whisky mix together before he sighs again. He didn’t mean to snap at you. It was a long day and Yugyeom pushed all his buttons. He expected to come home to a hot cooked meal with you waiting for him, but what he found was you sleeping on the couch.
That isn’t what upset him. If anything his heart clenched in his chest as he watched the rise and fall of your breasts. He woke you up by softly stroking your face and kissing your lips over and over. He smiled as your eyes fluttered open and the fear that he saw come to life irked him. It has been four months since he got you back. Long enough for you to get over your petty feelings and go back to the sweet woman he loved. This fearful little doe before him was not who he fell in love with.
"Ask me for anything, and it's yours.” Jackson cups your tear stained face in one of his hands and presses his forehead against yours. You can smell the alcohol on his breath and you want to push him away. The smell is too strong and makes you nauseous. “Anything, I swear it."
Through your tears, you shake your head, unable to believe his words. How many times has Jackson lied to you? Promised you such sweet dreams only to pull you into a never ending nightmare.
"...Anything?"
"Yes. Name it." Jackson gives a slight nod of his head, staring right into your eyes, his breath mingling with yours from being so close.
Closing your eyes, you inhale and pray to whoever might answer you, "...Let me go."
Jackson’s body tenses, his fingers digging into your cheek as his mind processes your request. You whimper, feeling the inside of your cheeks pressing into your teeth as Jackson’s grip on your face gets tighter and tighter.
“Look at me!” Jackson growls and your eyes snap open. Tears silently spill from those once warm brown eyes and Jackson shakes his head slowly, your foreheads rubbing against each other. “You. Are. Mine.” Your noses smush together as Jackson tries to crawl into your very soul.
“Mine. But if you want to go...” Jackson’s hand falls from your face and drops to your shoulder. He doesn’t take his eyes off you as he presses his lips to yours. The kiss is salty, filled with tears and trembling movements as Jackson brings his other hand to your shoulder.
His hands are warm, so very warm as his thumbs rub gentle circles against your bare skin. Up, up, up. His hands move slowly and he nibbles on your lower lip.
“Then go.”
His hands wrap around your neck and your eyes widen as your air supply starts to lessen. Your claw at Jackson’s hands, tears falling from your eyes as you struggle to breath. Jackson pushes you back on the bed and straddles your lap as he squeezes harder.
“S-Stop!” You beg, fearing for not only your life but the life that is growing inside of you.
“J-Jack-” You kick your legs and cry, unable to pull Jackson’s hands off you.
Jackson’s eyes are wild as tears stream down his face. His words are jumbled, coated thickly with his tears as he whispers his love over and over again.
“P-Ple-”
Your hands reach for your stomach and you cry harder.
“O-Our ba-baby!”
Jackson laughs bitterly through his tears as he kisses the last of your breath away, “Goodbye babies.”
His broken voice is the last thing you hear as you fade from the world…
If this fic isn't done by the end of NaNoWriMo I will die. Not like unalive die but like my soul will combust. Combust. Not wither away--it will explode in a firey blast of despair.
(Also I need beta reader(s) so I'm finna DM some people.)
My car got stolen by the fuckin "Kia Boys"(look them up, not sure if them having an internet name makes me feel better or worse😂). No more vroom vroom💨 for a while.
I almost left my notebook with the untyped sections of the fic in my car that day. So glad I didn't.
I just spent an hour taking pictures of every page for a backup. These aren't even all the pages, but seeing how many photos there are is jarring. Long fic for the win lol.
warnings: depictions of depression, crying in the rain
summary: in the rain you share your true thoughts with your freind
a/n: just trying to figure out my own feelings the best way i know how. it was raining the other day, so i just sat outside and cried. it was refreshing and a little lonely. but very much needed.
The rain poured down, dropping the size of half dollars. They bounced off the roof, gushed from the water spout and flooded the yard in front of the patio. You sat on the steps, soaked down to your underwear. Silent. You watched the world around you drown and inhaled deeply as the cold water caused goosebumps to rise on your bare arms. Your face lifted towards the sky, grey with traces of dark clouds and fading pinks. Raindrops stung your eyes and you closed them slowly. Tears slipped down your face as you cried silently. Your tears mixed and washed away with the rain. No one would know.
The rain stopped and you sighed as the warmth of a body sat beside you. Rain pelted the umbrella above and you slowly opened your eyes. Beside you, familiar brown eyes pierced into your soul. Calculating and steady, they watched you unsure of what they were seeing. You turned your gaze back to the flooded ground and ran your hand over your face.
“Your pants will get wet.”
“I’ll be fine.”
You looked at your friend of six years, silently. You could see the question in his eyes, the worry that framed his face and sat on his lips. His brown hair was hidden underneath a blue and white ball cap but you guessed that must have looked crazy. Why had he come outside in the rain when he was nice and comfy on the couch? You wanted to ask but the words didn’t come out. Should you tell him how you felt? Would he even understand?
“I feel like vanishing; like walking away and never looking back. I'm tired and I just don't want to do it anymore...life shouldn't be this fucking hard.”
You heard the words leave your mouth and focused on a rather large puddle in the distance. The body beside you, strong and warm, scooted closer until your knees touched. You started to pick at your nail bed as you continued.
“I get so overwhelmed. I get caught up in so many emotions and then it just feels…” Your voice trailed off and you sighed with an empty laugh. “Is this what drowning feels like?”
“No, but it comes very close.”
His voice shocked you, warm and soft as he spoke in time with the rain. So he did understand, huh? How foolish of you, of course he understood. The two of you were two sides of the same coin.
“Jackson?”
“Hmm?”
“I’m scared…”
“It’s okay to be scared, but know that I’m right here. I see you- ” Jackson grabbed your hands and squeezed them tightly. “I will always see you. I won’t let you vanish.”
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
My Idol is a South Korean competitive reality dating game show. It currently airs on Saturday nights on Jae-bummer’s blog. First broadcast in 2016, the show offers the opportunity for a lucky fan to go on seven blind dates with seven idols. The idol plans the date with the show throwing in a specific mission to complete during the day. At the end of the initial dates, the show opens up an audience vote to decide what four idols will move on to the second date.
My Idol 3: The Series
.
Looking up moodily at your night shift body guard, you waited in silence for him to open your room.
"No hello?" Insu teased, tilting his head. "How was your day? I've missed you terribly?"
"Hello, Insu," you grumbled, crossing your arms. "How was your day? I have missed you terribly."
"Well," he clucked. "It doesn't sound genuine when I have to prompt you."
"Can I please just go inside?" you whined, rubbing your forehead to ease the oncoming headache.
"Sure," he nodded. Letting the tension ease from your shoulders, you took a deep breath in an attempt to calm your nerves. "But it'll cost you."
"I have a sneaking suspicion that you're not talking about money," you groaned.
"Not at all," he smiled easily. "Money's worthless. You're time, however, is valuable."
"What do you want?"
"Grab your ice bucket," he said gently. "Let's go for a walk."
"I don't want to go for a walk," you pouted. "I've walked enough today. And ridden a bike. And fallen off that bike. And then thought my date died."
Insu nodded politely. "I think you need to decompress."
"I'm perfectly capable of decompressing in the comfort of my bed," you muttered.
"Where you can thought spiral through every hypothetical way you could have reacted on your date?" he smirked. "Perfect idea. Have a great night!"
"You're a little too perceptive for your own good," you grumbled. "Has anyone ever told you that before?"
"I read people for a living, Y/N," sighed. "You're just one of the lucky ones I like."
"I don't see why," you lamented, not proud of yourself, but searching for solace nonetheless. "I'm a walking disaster."
"Hardly," he said, tapping your room key against the door. Shouldering it open, he waited for you to pass him and go in. "Now come on. I'll even give you five minutes for a bathroom break before I expect to see you back out here."
Sliding into your room, you glanced at him over your shoulder. "How charitable."
After spending at least ten minutes sat on the sink, totally not thought spiraling, Insu's fourth round of knocking finally pushed you to hop off the counter. Snagging the ice bucket from beside you, you shuffled back toward the door and yanked it open. Chewing on your lip, you narrowed your eyes at the dastardly man.
"That was much longer than five minutes."
"Should've come in after me," you sighed, breezing past him. "What if I had passed out on the toilet? Some body guard you are."
"I'm here to protect you from other people," he chuckled. "Not from yourself."
"Comforting," you deadpanned. "I'll remember that the next time I feel faint."
The two of you walked down the hallway in companionable silence for a moment, giving you time to let your eyes wander from door to door. You were curious who was hidden where and if they were all comfortable with the current arrangements. Now you had three men, three celebrities, locked up for what could be weeks. They'd be missing crucial schedules, studio time, and dance practices...all because of you.
"You have no control over what fans do," Insu said quietly, seeming to have read your mind.
"Get out of my head," you huffed, glaring over your shoulder at him.
"I don't have to be in your head to know you're going through it," he hummed. "I can tell by your body language."
"Please, enlighten me," you sighed, coming to a halt and spinning toward him. "What is my body saying?"
You tried to ignore the up and down assessment he gave you.
"Your shoulders are tense," he noted. "You're either chewing on your lip or the inside of your cheek at any give time. Your arms are wrapped so tightly around the ice bucket, you-"
"Okay, okay," you accepted. "Apparently my body is talkative. I get it."
Turning back around, you started your trek again.
"I'm here to listen," Insu prompted from behind you. "If you want to talk about it."
"There's nothing to talk about," you alleged. "Plus I'm sure Hyuk gave you the full report."
"I did have to set three of his fingers," Insu confessed. "But he didn't get into specifics."
Whirling around again, your eyes were wide. "He didn't go to the hospital?"
"Not if he can avoid it," he smirked. "It's kind of the nature of the business."
"Great," you gasped, throwing your hands in the air, ice bucket included. "So I've been the cause for two people's physical injuries, my apartment being torn apart, AND everyone being held up in hotel rooms like some kind of fancy prison."
"Hey," Insu said quietly, taking slow steps to close the distance between the two of you. You hadn't noticed it previously, but you were breathing heavily and tears may or may not have started to escape your eyes.
Placing his hands lightly on your shoulders, he slid his fingers carefully down to your elbows and then back up again. "You're not responsible for any of that."
"I am," you whined. You were on the brink of becoming a blubbering mess. "I'm the unlikable one. Fans don't like me. That's why all of this is happening. I'm supposed to be better. I'm supposed to be more deserving."
"Come here," Insu said gruffly, pulling you against him. Wrapping his arms around your shoulders, he placed a hand gently on the back of your head. "With the fan-bases these guys have, no one will ever be good enough. It's not personal."
"They made it personal," you squeaked into his suit. While you weren't proud of your breakdown, you were enjoying the unexpected safety Insu provided. "They took away everything."
"They didn't," he insisted. "They can't take away how you react to the situation, and you've been doing well. Better than anyone can expect, really."
Pulling away from him, you caught Insu's eyes. "Why are you being so sweet?"
"I can't comfort a friend in need?" he smiled, patting your head absently before stepping back.
"We're friends?" you chirped, quietly pleased by this development.
"I guess we are," Insu hummed, seeming surprised by his own words.
You smiled softly at him, allowing this new, bubbly feeling to float through you. If not watched carefully, you knew it could be dangerous, and you already had enough boy-related problems on your hands.
"Y/N?" a familiar voice questioned from behind you.
Turning around, you couldn't help but feel the moment between you and Insu had been snuffed out. You were only mildly horrified with yourself as you felt a slight disappointment at another person joining the conversation until you realized who it was.
"Jungkook!" you grinned. It took everything in you not to greet him with a big hug.
He seemed to have no qualms though.
"Y/N!" he breathed, an easy smile filling his face. Crossing the hallway, he pulled you in for a hug. Wrapping his arms around your waist, he tucked you into his frame, enveloping you in warmth.
"It's so good to see you," he whispered into your hair.
"It's good to see you too," you sighed, leaning back to get a better look at him, but remaining in his arms. He looked as handsome as ever.
Clearing his throat behind you, Insu made his presence abundantly clear.
Stepping away from Jungkook, you felt heat creep up your neck. You glanced behind Jungkook, his won bodyguard giving an awkward wave.
"Sorry," Jungkook winced, nodding briefly to Insu. Focusing on you again, he grinned. "How are you?"
"I've been better," you admitted. "I'm hoping they filled you in when they moved you here?"
"A little bit," he grimaced. "Y/N, I am so sorry. I can't believe anyone would do that, let alone someone who would call themselves a fan of any of us."
"They killed my fish," you blurted, not realizing how much that thought burdened you.
"What?" he gasped, his eyes growing wide. He pulled you in for another hug. "You've been through so much."
"Y/N," Insu grunted behind you. "It's best we get going."
"Right," you nodded, stepping away from Jungkook. If the producers saw the two of you fraternizing in the hallway, it likely wouldn't go over well.
"I'm glad I saw you," Jungkook nodded, eyes bright. "Even if it was only for a minute."
You smirked before glancing to your feet. "I didn't get to ask, but you're doing okay?"
"I'm doing great," he chimed. "I've gotten more sleep than I have in years. And three meals a day! Can you even imagine?"
You let out an unexpected laugh. "That's a relief to hear. I'm glad you're resting well."
"So are the other guys," he nodded, somehow knowing that would comfort you. "Just to clarify. We're all taking this in stride."
"You've talked to them?" you asked, tilting your head.
"Hongseok and I get meals together downstairs sometimes," he said, an idea lighting up his expression. "You should meet with us!"
"Y/N," Insu cautioned. His quiet reminder that you've dallied too long.
"We should," you agreed before squeezing his bicep lightly. "I'll see you soon, okay?"
"Okay," Jungkook hummed, giving the cutest nose scrunch.
Taking a deep breath, you continued down the hallway past him, willing yourself not to look back. You hadn't realized how reassuring his presence would be. He was the only one who hadn't really been privy to the nightmare this experience had become, so it was such a relief to touch base. Plus he confirmed that he and Hongseok were doing just fine. You hoped he would begin including San in their shared meals as well.
Walking into the ice room in a bit of a daze, it took you a moment to realize how quiet Insu was being.
Turning to look at him as you filled your bucket, you were surprised when he didn't make eye contact. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," he said shortly.
"Apparently not," you chuckled nervously, feeling his mood change rolling off him in waves.
"We wasted too much time," he muttered. "We could've both gotten in trouble."
"It was just a quick conversation," you reasoned. "It wasn't really a big deal."
"Every minute you are outside of the safety of your room is a big deal," he said, glaring.
"Whoa," you winced, tucking your now full ice bucket back under your arm. "Down, tiger."
"I'm not going to endanger you just so some celebrity can get in his five minutes," he grumbled, looking anywhere but at you. "I'm sure that little stunt added quite the points in his favor."
"Insu," you whispered, recoiling from him as if you had been slapped. "Jungkook isn't like that."
"Right," he scoffed, turning around and leading you back into the hall.
Normally you walked in front of your body guard, but this time, he was stomping in front of you.
What was his issue?
Was he...jealous?
"Someone got really grumpy, rather quickly," you muttered, arriving at your door. Stepping in your way, Insu glared down at you.
"Just watch yourself, okay?" he said sternly. "These guys sell a fantasy every day. They're good at it."
"Heaven forbid someone genuinely likes me," you huffed.
"I didn't say they couldn't," he shot back. "All I'm saying is-"
"Yeah, yeah," you groaned. "Poor little Y/N, manipulated by the heart throb. I get it."
"Y/N," he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "That's not what I'm saying at all."
"Then come out with it!" you gasped. This day had been far too long and complicated for your liking. You were ready to hide under your blankets and never come out.
"I care about your well being!" he burst, his hands curling into fists as he let them drop to his sides. "I don't want to see you hurt!"
You chewed on his comment for a moment, watching as he continued to stare at you, frustration painted across his handsome face. "Why, Insu?"
"I told you earlier, I like you, Y/N," he struggled. "You don't want to see people you favor falling into situations where they're not watching out for themselves."
"You said you couldn't protect me from myself," you said quietly. "Remember?"
Insu let out a small grunt. "Stubborn."
"Exhausted," you corrected. "Thoroughly done. Burned out. Let me into my room."
Smacking your room's key card against the keypad, Insu backed into door. Keeping it open wide as you walked past, you could feel his eyes boring into you from behind.
"Goodnight," you huffed.
Without saying a word, he stepped into the hallway, closing the door softly behind him.
..
Your next date wasn't until the following evening, giving you plenty of time to stew in your disaster of a date, the situation with Insu, and the small rendezvous with Jungkook. Saying you were confused and irritable was an understatement.
You were already in the thick of things with three different idols and had four more to go. You couldn't go throwing Insu into the situation when your heart and mind were completely disoriented. You had never navigated anything quite this intense in your life.
Jungkook had pure intentions, of that you were sure. That's why Insu's outburst had shaken you so much. He didn't know anything about these guys, and it was clear in the way he was acting. That being said, you couldn't help that it had sewed the smallest seed of doubt in your mind. He was right, idols were well-versed in giving the illusion of attainability. Surely they weren't putting on an act just to win the competition...were they? The cameras weren't even around when you had bumped into Jungkook. He had no reason to be so caring if that were the case.
"Damnit, Insu," you hissed, knowing this would dwell in the back of your head. How dare he open that door when you were already feeling like you were going crazy.
Lost in thought, you yanked open the door of your hotel room right after you heard a knock. Hyuk had dropped you off for makeup and hair not long ago with the promise of your date starting soon. It was going to be a formal evening, so you were dressed exceptionally well (at least to your own standards). Shimmying out your shoulders, you tried to focus on the task at hand. You would have fun tonight, even if it killed you.
Glancing up from your uncomfortable shoes, you were taking aback at seeing Insu again so quickly.
"What are you doing here?" you croaked, unintentionally sounding annoyed by his mere presence.
Insu's eyebrows shot up. "This is an evening date. Am I not your night shift bodyguard?"
Right. Somehow it had completely evaded you that he would be the one escorting you this evening.
"Perfect," you muttered, shaking your head. This was just great.
Barging your way around him, you started down the hall, trying to calm your anxiety. It was hard enough jumping into another blind date, let alone with your moody body guard in tow.
Stepping into the elevator, you scooted as far away from him as you could. Maybe it was a bit immature, but you were emotionally frazzled before you had even blown up at each other last night. It was to be expected that you were still a little bit raw.
Punching at the button for the lobby, Insu became a statue beside you. Remaining quiet, it wasn't until the end of the elevator ride that he finally spoke up. "You look beautiful."
"Thanks," you managed, not allowing for his kind words to melt the ice that had frozen around you.
"Y/N," he sighed, turning slightly toward you. "Surely you can understand where I was coming from-"
"Doubling down is not the optimal move here," you grumbled, holding up a hand in the air between you. "I'm trying to get into a good mental space to handle this date. I really don't want to talk about last night."
"Can we talk later?" he asked, tilting his head.
"No."
"Y/N-"
"I'll think about it," you groaned. "Okay? Just give me some space for tonight."
Giving a curt nod, Insu stepped back into his position beside you.
It wasn't long before the elevator doors slid open, exposing you to the commotion that was the hotel lobby. Taking a deep breath, you stepped from the small space. Furrowing your brows, you were surprised to see a handsome man, dressed in a full suit in front of you. The cameras were on and waiting for your arrival.
"Wow," his surprisingly gravely voice purred. Reaching out to take your hand, he smiled. "You must be Y/N."
"I am," you said cautiously.
"I'm Got7's Jackson," he smiled. "And you are absolutely gorgeous."
You tried to ignore the sharp intake of breath from behind you.
I have a 💖💫GOAL🧚♀️✨️ to write a scene today. Not half a scene, an entire shity ass scene that I hate because I let shitty writing stop me from writing.
