#itaky

This is me and my sisters. The first one is from 1996, some months before we fled Albania, knee deep in civil war. The second one was took this month when they came to visit me in Poland.

Both my dad and mother worked in the navy in Albania, but then the piramidal scheme destroyed Albanian economy and Albanians savings. The people were angry and the weapon deposits were opened, common people free to took what they wanted. It was a period of anarchy for the country, many people died or were maimed because some child put their hands upon some gun and played with it.

My father and many of his fellow soldiers were afraid that soon they will receive the order to shoot to the people who manifested around the city so they grabbed a broken ship from the naval base, took their families and fled their homeland. The ship had a problem with the rudder and the travel to Italy was disastrous. My sisters said me there was a storm that night and that at some point I rolled all over the floor of the cabin we and other 15 people shared to bang my head on the wall.

The ship I was in was lucky. We arrived just two weeks before the Katër I Radës, a ship that sinked after being rammed by a patrol boat of the Italian Navy killing 109 people, 27 of which body were never found. The ship me and my family were was lucky.

We arrived in Brindisi, Italy. My dad was spareted from my mom, me and my 10 and 12 years old sisters. It was three weeks before my 3rd birthday.

Then we went to Palestrina, Rome, only mom, my sisters and me. My dad had to stay for further controls an reached us only two weeks after. We were hosted by a far cousin of my mom. They had a two room apartment, only one bedroom and a kitchen. My sisters slept on a small sofa. My mom and I on the table.

A family gave us a trailer and we used as a house for some time after that. But then a drunkard put it on fire while my mom and I were inside. My mom took me and get away. My sisters were at school and was one of those uncommon days my dad was took on a building site to work. They checked their teeth before hiring them. They all went everyday in front of the church and hoped for luck.

I rember eating ‘fried past’. Its easy and cheap. You just fry some spaghetti in oil and add water and salt. I remember eating a lot of that.

But the things get better and better. My mom found a job as a cleanibg lady. We could afford to have a two room apartment. At the beginning my sisters slept in the kitchen but then my cousin came from Albania too and they slept in the room. It wasn’t very big and in the summer was quite hot.

When I was 8 we moved to the north. My dad found a better job, less payed but everything were legal thi time. We changed city other three times before I turned 11.

Children were mean. And I was always that ‘dirty Albanian’. And some teachers sometimes were deaf. I never told my parent anything about that. But I cried a lot at night. My sisters too.

But things went better. My bigger sister started to work at 13 as a waitress. My parents didn’t want her to but she started to sneak out of school to work. They figured if they left her work on evenings at least she would have gone to school on mornings. My sister has two degrees now. One in banking laws and the other in international right. The first of her thesis was about the Albanian piramidal crysis of 1997. She graduated magna cum laude. She speaks five languages and did an internship in the EU offices. She pays half of my family house mortgage in Italy.

My second sister started working at 16. She also has two degrees, both in economy. She lives in Milan and is a manager. She’s the most lucky on love of us three.

My parents worked all their lifes. Me and my sisters too. We never spended like crazy. We couldn’t afford to eat outside, but my mom had been a cook in the navy so we still eat ed good. Mom does a mean pizza. I started helping my mom as a cleaning lady in the summer when I was 14. My parents didn’t let me find a real job while a was at university. My bigger sister prohibited me. I could have worked for the small jobs my university found me inside the campus but nothing more. We could afford it after 20 years.

My parents buyed me and a my sisters small apartments in Albania. We’re not rich bu we have something to rely on if we need. We saved as much as we could. The last year of high school my class went to Prague for a week. My parents insisted that I went, but I said them I wanted to pass my birthday with my family. It was a lot of money and we were renovating the house we had just buyed.

I was lucky. My dad is a feminist. Nor he or my mom never said me how I should dress or that I couldn’t have a boyfriend. They never gave me a curfew. I just had to say them when I was to came back if I knew, and they knew all my friends. My mom would probably have a fit if I presented her an Albanian boyfriend. Most Albanian families are still pretty maschilist, my parents don’t like much Albanian guys my age.

Me and my family were lucky. Our story is happy one.