#it's...fascinating

Sunggyu has been observing Myungsoo for hours, watching his every move and how he acts around Sunggyu. Something was bothering his mate and Sunggyu has a feeling that that ‘something’ is related to him since Myungsoo has been avoiding him all day. Sunggyu wonders if he did something wrong, but he can’t remember doing anything wrong at all. It’s awkward, there are only two of them in the house and Myungsoo doesn’t seem to want to face Sunggyu all day. He was okay in the morning, but after Sunggyu got home, Myungsoo seems weirder than usual.

"Myungsoo-yah, is there anything wrong?" he asks casually, once Myungsoo finally sits not so far away from him. They are having dinner together, and Sunggyu should know that even though Myungsoo is avoiding him, he won’t avoid dinner.

"Huh? There is nothing wrong." Myungsoo answers, still not looking at Sunggyu and eyes fixated on the dinner table instead.

"Really? You know I can tell if you’re lying, right?"

For Sunggyu, Myungsoo is always easy to read. It probably helps that Myungsoo is not good at lying anyway.

Myungsoo sighs and finally looks at Sunggyu. There is sadness in his eyes and Sunggyu hates it. He hates it even more that he can’t take a guess on what makes Myungsoo sad. He feels like a bad mate.

"I did a pregnancy test this morning." Myungsoo finally says, in a tiny voice that Sunggyu doesn’t expect. He also doesn’t expect that answer. Because why would Myungsoo do a pregnancy test?

"Myungsoo, you can’t—”

"I know. I can’t get pregnant. I don’t know why I am being like this."

Sunggyu gets silent, unable to answer. He suddenly feels really guilty. It’s not his fault that Myungsoo, unlike other omegas, can’t bear a child. But still, he feels really guilty for feeling kind of relieved when he found out about that, especially since Myungsoo was absolutely devastated. No, Myungsoo is still devastated about that. Sometimes Sunggyu finds him almost cry whenever he sees other couples with kids.

The thing is, while Myungsoo wants to have a lot of children, Sunggyu doesn’t want to have any kids. He has decided that he doesn’t want to have any kids since a long time ago. He can’t deal with children.

And—Sunggyu is selfish. Their first big fight as a couple was about children. That time, Myungsoo decided that even if he can’t get pregnant, they still should try to adopt and Sunggyu turned down the idea heartlessly. Even Sunggyu admitted, that he was heartless at that time because he was not in love with Myungsoo as much as he is now. He made Myungsoo cried for days and he hated himself for that. The fight is never resolved.

Sunggyu doesn’t feel ready to have kids, he probably won’t feel ready at all. Sometimes he also feels scared to actually have a full family. Taking care of a family feels like too much of a responsibility.

But Sunggyu wonders…..if he should sacrifice for Myungsoo. He suddenly realizes, that he has been selfish for far too long. Myungsoo is always ready to sacrifice anything for Sunggyu and maybe it’s time for Sunggyu to do the same.

Maybe.

"It’s okay, we can still adopt even if you can’t bear a child." Sunggyu tries to say that in a casual voice, but it still sounds awkward. But Myungsoo finally lights up, the sadness in his eyes changes into hopefulness.

"Really?"

"Yes, really."