When it comes to the form, he knows heâs done badly before she even sees it.
Cole really has tried, painstakingly practicing his writing until it almost looks right, even through the frustration of trying to sit and be focused in a way that feels stifling, of trying to keep his focus on the paper and the lines instead of to people passing, or the morning air, or a squirrel scurrying by. He wants this, has desperately longed to chase it since he understood enough about the poster in front of him to go from you can do that to i have to learn.
It still isnât good. Heâs given up on âageâ entirely and hopes she wonât ask, and the writing isnât anything like Josephineâs pretty curling lines or Solasâs plain, easy letters. Heâs spelled things wrong, and there are parts he doesnât know how to write down. So he is already preparing himself, when he hands his paper over, making plans to stick to the shadows and watch and try to learn that way.
And then - she says yes. She has doubts and worries and she knows his writing is bad, but Athena says yes. And sheâll teach him.
The feeling is - quick and bursting, in his chest, and he isnât sure where itâs come from (because it isnât her happiness, or anyone elseâs around) but tracing it isnât important right now. The want comes back in a roaring wave and it trips his words as he tries to find the right ones.
âI know it isnât - good. I know I need to learn things that I should know already, but Iâll listen and practice if you tell me things. I need to -
âI didnât know that you could teach helping. I just knew I was trying, and not very good at it, and people told me things that sometimes helped and sometimes didnât. But they - where you come from, they gave it a name, and they taught you, like they teach cooking or writing or, or healing herbs.
âSo... I promise Iâll try my hardest. I want to learn it too.â