#isitsad

is it sad that i feel closer to you when talking to your girlfriend

is it sad that after an argument  when the anger dies down it only makes me realize how far apart we really are how even tho ive known you since birth their are people in my life that only after a few months know more about me and understand more about me than you do than you may ever understand

is it sad how i look at you and see the effect of me not taking action early enough and you look back at me and regret not ever taking action

is it sad that there is only one moment in my remaining memory in which i was happy being around you

is it sad that im told to love you and do so yet i can see in your eyes that you don't know the person you are trying to love back you don't know me i don't know you we are almost like strangers but our blood bond makes us love what we don't personally know 

is it sad that im afraid to let you into my life and let you get to know me because any time i let you have a small window thru my wall all you do is judge me for that tiny piece of my life

is it sad that i cover myself in lie and immaturity in profanity and fake problems to hide myself from you... too hide myself from everyone 

is it sad that i got so into hiding the real me from you that i hide the real me from every one

is it sad that when i do show some of the real me every one thinks im acting weird every one you mommy all my friends all family and that the only people who have seen even half of who i really am with a few clicks i could shut out of my life a block on facebook.... a removed contact on skype... a few deleted servers on minecraft..... and the only ones with even an inkling as to who i am are gone just like that.