#irl antics

Okay now my body is DEF forcing me to have a break bc I started to feel an ache in my wrist and then it lowkey cracked like it broke when I moved my hand ψ(._. )>

update: MY WHOLE FOREARM IS HURTING AND THE TIP OF MY MIDDLE FINGER FEELS LIKE IT WAS PRICKED BY A SPINDLE LIKE IM SLEEPING FUCKING BEAUTY.

update 2: NOW BOTH MY WRISTS ARE HURTING WTF

• Violence Is The Answer. *Laughing* (one of my friends)

• MAKE AMERICA GRAPE AGAIN!

• me: "hey again Mr. mint green"

acquaintance: "bitch, it's turquoise"

(that was actually earlier today)

• Ew Cringe Nasty Gross! (literally that chain of words in that order in reaction to gum on the side of her locker)

• Rose keep your hands to yourself, that's weird!

(here is an exchange between me, Rose - the science class idiot, and her 2 other pals ahead)

Me: those 3 are the commentators of this class I swear

Rose, having overheard me: We're like the commentators of this class!

Me: You Really Are, Honestly!

Her 2 Overprotective Friends: WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT, THAT'S MEAN! (they just agreed with her seconds before saying this)

(...god I hate people at this school..)

• teacher: Excuse me, I am talking!

Rose: and I am not

• Life's nice when you choke on noodles. (one of my friends)

• THAT CINDERELLA CAME OUT OF NOWHERE! (I didn't catch the context)

• (group of like 7 friends chanting as they walk out to the gym) JUST KEEP SWIMMING, JUST KEEP SWIMMING, JUST KEEP SWIMMING, SWIMMING, SWIMMING

• SHE IS HAVING A SEIZURE IN HER SOUL! (yet again same friend)

• Harambe will forever be in our hearts...  and our memes...

• (shouted by someone in the locker room) Has Anyone Seen A Sparkly Gay Comb?

• Have you Ever Even Dabbed Once In Your Life?

• Look at all the slimes! Ah, they're so beautiful, so many slimes (watching a minecraft vid as he passes me by)

• DRINK BLEACH!! (one of my friends)

• School's over, I'm gonna go home and go fuck somebody

• WHERE THE FUCK IS COACH GRAY?!

• Anthony! Stop Talking!.. It's Too Damn Early For This..

• My AB Teacher Called Me Daddy

• ...(conversation in the bathroom by the gym) AND THEN He Choked On His OWN Cum! *LAUGHTER* AAAH, ahh, We're Gonna Be SO Late..

• Ay Coach Sneed, We Got A Pole Dancer Over Here!

• My Hair Is All Screwy!! (said loudly and obnoxiously as they pass by my AB class, making the entire class giggle)

• If A Suspicious Stranger Asked Me Where I Live, I'd Say I Live On the Dark Side Of The Moon With The Space Nazis, Waiting To Destroy The World. (yet another beautiful quote by the same friend I've mentioned several times)

• (finally my personal favorite, and also the quote that made me start this list)

I never thought, in all my years of life, that I would find the absolute comedy of a silly Italian man referring to tools of his trade, that I KNOW he knows what are, as "Thingies."

Such antics included, but were not limited to:

Doc: "Did you grab the-" Nurse: "Yes, I put it right over there." Doc: "No, I mean the instrument" Nurse: *referring to me* "It's on her chest." Doc: "I thought we had that new polishing compound" Nurse: "Uhm... no? I don't think so?" Doc: "Check for me, please?" *She leaves and comes back* Nurse: "Okay, it's on order, but it's on backorder until like next week" Doc: "Oh, no. Okay, we'll just use the cones. Did you set them up already?" Nurse: "They're right behind you"

And:

Doc: "Okay, so if I remember correctly, Black is the coarsest one, so we do that one first. The colours go Black, Green, Purple, Pink, yes?" Nurse: *actually pulling out the instructions* "Uh.. yeah. Yeah, that's right." Doc: "Let me see, I want to make sure." *holding the paper right in front of my eyes, he confirms the colour order* Doc: "Yes, see? I was right, I just wanted to make sure! Okay!"

And, of course: