#ingodalone

It has been a roller coaster of a weekend to say the least. I am at a young people’s conference of AA and I have brought 11 teenage boys from my work with me. Under my supervision are two staff, one of which is now in the hospital. I also found out that one of my coworkers died from a drug overdose. A good friend and mentor that I have had the pleasure of working with over the past six months was just fired. I have also been told that my brother who struggles with suicidal ideations, and has been hospitalized for them, is now in a slump again. 

How have I made it through the chaos? Surrender. I’ve felt a lot of emotions in the past 48 hours. All the while, I’ve had to be a strong leader for my staff and students. It’s a lot for a 21 year old. I think it’s a lot for anyone. I was sitting in a meeting tonight wondering what it would be like if my brother took his own life. I was imagining the pain and destruction it would cause to my families life. I found myself asking, “How could I deal with this? What would I do?” One thing is for certain is that we are in a war between good and evil. In this war, our enemy is relentless and has no mercy. He spins lies and manipulates things that are good into destroying us. This is something I cannot change. Satan hits below the belt, but that does not mean that I cannot protect myself down there. The things I have been able to change tonight are my thoughts, actions, words, attitude, and faith. I have been able to bring God into a weekend full of calamity and have felt serenity.