So .. that's what it feels like to Lose.

                                  To not be fast enough ..

                                                To let the very one you love .. die.

                                                                                It hurts. 

          To be haunted by past failure .. to be reminded of mistakes you can never take back .. to be defiled by such hideous reminders day in and day out .. these plagues were known quite well to a certain Dragon Slayer.  To be marred by evil,  the very skin stripped away,  leaving nothing but scarred flesh.  Physical wounds do heal .. but ones of the heart,  they seem to last forever.  

          The boy had completed the mission,  but like all good soldiers .. he must now live with the trauma,  the consequences .. the failure.  The war for the Future may have been won,  their futures saved to be carved into whatever image they so choose .. but what about the past?  Could there be nothing done of the pain there?  Nothing done of the loss?  The future always seemed so malleable,  the path stretching on to whatever they'd imagined,  nothing holding back.  But the past .. it grinded to a halt.  It stayed motionless,  always the same.  No matter how strong the boy became .. the past could never be changed.  Not even Dragon King flames could burn through it.  This revelation haunted Salamander,  taunted him again and again,  the face of his dear friend .. the tears shed .. the scars bore .. the trauma sustained .. it was all too much for just one lonely boy .. 

          Dawn light peaks through unshuttered windows,  and a new day begins.  Salamander stirs,  continuing to rithe and scowl within slumber.  Sweat coated face contorted,  the horror hiding just beneath the surface,  another nightmare he must live within.  A white paw soon took to aid,  shaking Salamander awake,  as boy bolted up,  her name still on his lips ..

                                            ❝  Lucy--!!  ❞

          But Clestial would be nowhere to be seen,  a fading memory in a broken heart's dream.  Exceed once more laid paw upon friend,  a comforting gesture they shared.  No words need be spoken,  but sentiment was surely felt.  Without another word,  boy was off to get ready for the day.  Another exciting day in the best Guild in all of Fiore,  right?  

          Turning the trauma into triumph,  the boy made his merry way to his home away from home,  the place he loved,  the place he protected,  the home of all his beloved friends .. Fairy Tail.  The scowl that bore upon visage now tuned into the usual grin,  a beautiful day surrounded him,  the sun was shining ever brighter,  like the future he has won for them.  These should be happy times,  right?  The world is calling out in celebration,  the clear blue sky enlightening and free,  and yet .. these thoughts bore into him like a vice.  Why wouldn't they just go .. fly away like the birds in the sky?  What use were they,  but to remind him of his failures .. of the loss of life draconic couldn't prevent?

          Leaving those sickening thoughts behind,  sandal soon met hardwood and entrance swung forth,  flames spouting from wide,  bellowing cavern.  Canines peeked,  salmon tress swung wildly.  That's right,  Natsu Dragneel is in the building  !!

[ 𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐄 ] - 𝑎𝑐𝑐𝑒𝑝𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔

A million years ago in...*checks notes*...2014 or something, I made a personal blog and ended up coming across some Fairy Tail RP blogs. I had no idea what was going on or what RP blogs were, but the interactions were so hilarious and interesting. I'd only watched the anime up until that point i think. I also remember reading a lot of fanfic at the time and having no idea who Sting and Rogue were 😂 i was Unaware of the 7yr time skip and just remember all the fanfics being like "A/N: this is after the GMG" or "Pre-GMG" and i was like idk what that is.

Anyway, i'm glad the blogs i came across weren't the "block personals On Sight" types, i probably wouldn't be here otherwise! (but i Do understand why people take the 'block personals' stance, dont get me wrong). I followed them and supported their content and after a little while a certain few followed back, surprisingly. and then I started reading the manga and made a post like "haha what if i made a blog for this guy" and they were like "👀 do it, i'll make you icons" and then i made the blog and joined in with all the fun shenanigans I'd been seeing, and it was great!

On more than one occasion I have considered picking up Erza as a a muse, but always chickened out before actually committing. I've always loved her as a character and thought about writing her for awhile, but IDK, guess it was just never a strong enough muse. Maybe one day I'll add her to my multi, but honestly it's kinda *shrug* atm.

╳┆Of all the places he expected to track a practitioner of dark magic, a charity auction fell far down the list.

Over the years, he'd become quite adept at sneaking into places he was not formally invited to. Of course, it always helped to don some form of disguise — be it his cloak, a costume, or something else similar — but the venue was checking names, faces, and tickets at the door. Even better, the estate was lined up and down with magically armed security.

It seemed he would have to get creative. He really did not want to make this a bigger spectacle than necessary.

[ 𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐄 ] -- 𝑛𝑜 𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑔𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑐𝑐𝑒𝑝𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔

A lull in the war. A brief respite between battles. A chance to regroup and tend to wounds. With everything that had been going on, he’d found himself separated from his usual comrades, a fact that unsettled him more than he’d like to admit. Perhaps if he’d had one of them near, it could have been them that helped him now (or at the very least, their presence could have been reassuring), instead of the blonde Fairy.

Despite the urge to move away from her, he kept still, even preventing himself from showing distaste at her proximity (for truly, the injury was less uncomfortable to him than sharing his personal space). He kept wary crimson eyes on her as she worked, studying her face and own visible injuries. His gaze shifted to the wound on his arm, which held her attention currently, and he watched as she cleaned it.

Her ministrations were gentle, yet efficient, allowing him to hope the process would be finished soon. Perhaps once she was done, he would look for his guildmates and see how they had fared thus far. The trouble was, he didn’t know where to look.

For the first time since she had offered to help him, he spoke.

[ 𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐄 ] -- 𝑛𝑜 𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑔𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑐𝑐𝑒𝑝𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔

With thick pages, a worn leather cover, and a considerable amount of information contained within, the book he held was a heavy tome indeed. Rare, due to both its age and content, it had been a stroke of good fortune to come across it in the store they had been browsing in.

“- detailing the first usages of script based magics,” he was saying, eyes on the book itself as his hand gently ran over the cover. He went on, “The section on runes will be particularly interesting, as will the chapters on syntax and the transmutation of the Delphic lexicon to the regulatory language constructs used today.”

He delicately opened the book and found its opening chapter, eyes skimming. “Ah, yes…fascinating…This covers the research done into the earliest known uses of such magic, including incredibly rare firsthand accounts that have been collated. There are other books on this topic, but I believe this one to be the most reliable source.”

Before he could be drawn too far into the text, he pulled himself back, gaze rising to find Lucy. Awareness of his rambling brought him a trace of embarrassment, a sheepish smile settling even as he cleared his throat.

[ 𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐄 ] -- 𝑛𝑜 𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑔𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑐𝑐𝑒𝑝𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔

How he and Lucy had been roped into helping Mira sort out the guild storeroom, he wasn’t sure. Everything had happened in a blur of long white hair and a devilishly sweet smile, and now he found himself surrounded by various boxes and shelves. He sighed and set his hands on his hips as he surveyed the room and the task ahead.

Since their success at the Grand Magic Games, the guild had seen a steady flow of jobs (yet somehow the hall always seemed so full, so noisy, when were the jobs actually being taken?), and its popularity lent itself receiving support from local businesses with fresh produce and supplies. A large delivery had been dropped off in the morning and needed to be sorted and stored, it was not something he typically had to deal with, yet he supposed he was glad he’d been pulled into it with Lucy, as opposed to a certain someone who would have no doubt made the task much harder than it needed to be.

Rubbing the back of his neck, he turned his eyes over to his companion as she spoke, eyes lifting towards the shelf she indicated. A small, wooden crate perched at the top and, judging by its label, it was where they should stock the tinned fruit they’d received.

“Yeah, sure,” he said, stepping around a few boxes and making his way over to her. With the area becoming a little more confined between two tall shelves, he did his best not to bump into them or Lucy herself. He reached up with one hand to grab the crate, and quickly lifted his other hand as he accidentally knocked a box next to it. “Oh, shit-“

He caught the box and carefully pushed it back into place “- that was close.” Relief curved his lips as he glanced at his almost-victim Lucy.

Resigned to the fact that sleep would not come to him, Rogue quietly exited the room he shared with Sting, Frosch, and Lector, leaving them to their peaceful slumber. On silent steps, he headed down the halls of the Inn, sharp senses tuning into the occupants of the other rooms as he passed them. The pressure seemed to cloak him, relenting only once he made his way to the door he’d spotted earlier. He opened it and stepped out into the cool, night air. The garden area was small, yet well maintained, and the flowers around provided a relaxing scent that wasn’t too overpowering for him.

He moved over to the set of chairs surrounding a small glass table, taking a seat and adjusting his cloak around himself for warmth. A heavy sigh escaped him, and he turned his gaze up to the clear sky and its blanket of stars. There were benefits, he supposed, in being awake at this time. But still, was a good night’s rest too much to ask for?

Throughout his life, sleep had been something of an adversary to him, cruelly teasing him and then dancing out of reach, rarely ever staying. Ever since the Grand Magic Games, the things he had learnt, the things he had seen, sleep had only grown more difficult to grasp. To think there was a future where he would do such horrible things and unleash a horde of dragons upon the land…

He shook himself free of such thoughts, knowing they only kept the chance of sleep further away from him. The future was not set. He would not turn into that twisted version of himself. Already, he worked to avoid the possibility alongside his friends, beginning to make Sabertooth a better guild, a healthier one. One where he would be stopped from ever treading a dark path. To that end, having the occasional joint mission with other guilds was a good step, an opportunity to see how others worked and to form bonds and alliances.

Eyes on the stars, he listened for the allies they had teamed up with for the quest. There was something…reassuring about their presence (even if he somewhat dreaded these particular ones with their penchant for property destruction). Footsteps, distant at first, became gradually louder (but not heavy), then they stopped. He tilted his head, the sound of the door opening behind him came like a whisper, then a familiar scent floated on the breeze. Well, this was a surprise…