#ikonthoughts

I’ve been rediscovering my love for kpop while I have a million minutes of free time on my hands. I was a kpop fan in the early 2000s until the mid 2010s. Life got busy and it kind of fell off my radar. I’m Korean adoptee and studied Korean language and culture in university. I studied abroad there twice in Korea and kpop has always been a polarizing thing for me. On one hand I loved the music and the fanfare and just the whole production of kpop. 

But on the other hand, nothing makes me sadder than when kpop goes wrong. For example, when BI left IKon last summer and the whole mystery surrounding it. He was one of the hardest working people in any group (in my opinion). I followed them from Mix & Match and it hurt me so much to see how much they suffered for a dream. And then finally when that dream was realized and gaining a lot of traction, it was ripped away. Furthermore, there were fans who criticized him and his fellow bandmates for having human emotions. YG even removed his producing credits for songs that he made while participating in IKon. (They’ve never done that for any artist that has left or had a scandal). Fans tried to appeal to YG for 6 months via hashtags and social media, but it seems like the effort has tapered off. 

IKon released a new mini album recently and I really like it. BI is credited on it but seemingly grudgingly. I can’t help but feel it’s only to appease those fans who are still holding out hope. It’s a quiet but firm “he’s never coming back so let it go.” 

My moments of laughter at crazy kpop weirdness are almost always balanced by sobering moments of kpop toxicity. So many groups I used to listen to no long exist. Once well-known singers, rappers, dancers, and all around good people just fade into the background and are forgotten. What kind of life is that? With the constant fear of becoming irrelevant, not cool enough, not good enough? Of course, part of me knows it’s an industry of survival of the fittest, but it still doesn’t make the kpop “deaths” any easier for me to handle. 

I don’t really expect anyone to read this. I haven’t been active on this tumblr in forever but it is proof of my past relationship with kpop. If you did read this and got this far, thank you. I’m always open to a dialogue. Let me know what you think. If you agree or diagree (even better). Drop me a line. I have all the time.