#ifuckinghateyou

“Oh I’m going to miss you so much!” 

The tight embrace made Gigi tear up in her mother’s arms. The worst part of returning to the boarding school across the country was having limited time to spend with who she considered to be her true best friend, but a bit of relief washed over her upon the thought of not having to explain anything about herself to her dad. Both knew being at Redwood had its advantages when it came to colleges like Parsons, NYU and the Fashion Institute of Technology, another thing that made the distance worth it. Only the best of the best, because even Gigi herself knew it’s what she deserved going forward with her professional career. 

“Mom, you always come over for Thanksgiving, I’ll see you soon enough” Gigi gave a reassuring smile to her mother once they were facing each other again. She nodded, sniffling a little “No! Don’t cry!” Without a fail, Kristi Goode always cried when dropping off her girl at the Secondary School. Or any school, in that matter. 

“I’m sorry my dear, it’s just that you’ve grown up so fast right before my eyes” She released a teary chuckle and wiped away her tears carefully. “I’ll drop you off at the door. Let’s roll!” 

“Mom! No one says that anymore!” Gigi complained with a bright smile on her face, making it clear she was joking. She could never truly scold her mom, no matter the reason. 

“Oh mon amour!” Was the first thing Gigi heard when she crossed the door. Nicky Doll passed from being the foreign exchange student to her 8th grade crush to one of her greatest, closest friends. “I missed you!” 

“I can’t believe we’re roomies again!” Gigi squealed, setting her bags down and running up to hug her friend tightly. 

“I thought they were going to separate us after the soirée fiasco last year!” Less than four months ago, as a way to commemorate the closing semester, they invited a small circle of people to have a small pajama party in their room, which was nothing out of the ordinary. But, it being a school so knit-tight, word spread like a wildfire. Some substances like alcohol and marijuana were found, but the amount of people in their room and the ones near were so much, no one could be really be blamed for anything. 

As Gigi was widely admired and praised by the school’s headmaster, she was let off the hook with a few hours of detention and not a stain on her record. A lot of people argued it was unfair, and an almost equal amount argued it was all she deserved. But generating controversy was something Gigi Goode was used to, and fed herself off from. 

“Who else might be with us?” Gigi asked, breaking away from the hug and smoothing out her friend’s designer blazer. Nicky’s mouth gaped open to reply, but a voice at the door interrupted her attempt. 

“Who else might be with us?” Dahlia’s voice mocked her friend’s, the impression was oddly accurate. Before the pair could react, a loud thud and a pair of arms tugged them both into yet another tight embrace. Gigi wasn’t the biggest fan of hugs, but when it came to the warmth her friends brought after so much time separated, hugs were incredible. “Ugh I missed you two so much!” 

Yet again, Nicky’s mouth opened to reply only to be interrupted by someone at the door. “Hey bitches!” The smooth voice resonated in the closed space. The french girl was about to be mad for yet another interruption, until she visualized who it was “She’s here!” 

A combination of amusement and confusion twisted onto Gigi’s features. Jaida Essence Hall was both her competition and her greatest acquaintance. Not that they wanted to compete, people just found ways to compare them to each other, as if they were searching for a source of drama that would actually never come knocking on their doors. Rather than hatred, they felt admiration and respect for each other, and often realized they made quite the decent team when working on projects. But, it was always Nicky, Gigi and Dahlia rooming together; the scheme hadn’t changed in years. What had happened? 

Dahlia raised a brow noticing how this was the first time Nicky didn’t fluster at the appearance of their new roommate. Did she lose interest in Jaida? She knew the foreigner never wanted to say anything, but actions spoke more than words. Dahlia might fail english literature this year, but she knew a lot about love literature. However, she was never able to figure out where Gigi was regarding her love life. Whenever either of them asked, she shifted uncomfortably in her place, tensed up and urged to change the subject. At that point, both her best friends gave up on their hopes on knowing what was inside Genevieve’s mind regarding her feelings towards people, and left her alone with her thoughts. 

“You’re here with us?! This is all that and a bag of chips!” She was the first one to greet Jaida, the others doing so reluctantly, Nicky because she was utterly embarrassed, and Gigi was utterly curious. 

“I don’t want to seem rude, and I hope it doesn’t sound rude, and maybe it is literally none of my business but…” She took a deep breath in, pausing once she noticed she was rambling. Jaida gave her a look to extort her into continuing “...But, what are you doing here?” 

“Oh haven’t you heard?” Dahlia didn’t allow Jaida to even respond, her eyes glimmering at the chance of gossip “We’ve got two newbies in our year. One is a transfer from the Cali location and the other one just switched schools to here. I heard she killed her father and had to run away somewhere else” 

The other three girls stared at her friend in horror, eyes open wide. How can you just conspire on someone murdering one of their parents? Jaida shook her head to the idea “Dahlia, please! That ain’t something to joke about” She scolded the girl, flicking her hair behind her shoulder “Widow told me they’re long time friends. That’s all I know” 

“Maybe we can ask about them later” Nicky gave the most rational answer in the room, to which the rest agreed. Gigi’s stomach churned. She didn’t want to talk to anyone new. In fact, she didn’t want anyone new at all. Building trust among her classmates was something that took her ages, only for her having to go through the process again with two strangers. No. She had a bad feeling about this. Still, despite her secret distress, she followed her friends towards the two girls sitting on the couch in their common room. Gigi caught a glance of two girls rushing inside the dorm two doors away from hers. Huh. 

“Hey girls!” Nicky called out, approaching them with a bright smile. The two instantly did the same, getting up to greet the small group that walked towards them.

“I can’t believe we got separated this year” Jaida spoke first after the exchange of pleasantries, her three other new roommates standing besides her with quiet smiles. 

“Sucks ass, doesn’t it? I offered myself to host the new girls anyway.” Heidi answered the question on why they both landed with them, instead of setting them up each in separate rooms. “And with Widow knowing one of them, it isn’t that big of a surprise”

“You’re too nice, Heidi” Jaida shook her head lightly, eyes lightning up at the mention of the topic of interest. “What about those two girls? Are—”

Dahlia butted in, interrupting Jaida who shut her mouth into a straight line and stared blankly upon being interrupted, avoiding to look mad “Is it true one of them murdered her dad?”

While Gigi, Nicky and Jaida cringed, Heidi and Widow stared at her in blank horror, just like her roommates had done earlier but somehow even worse. Widow opened her mouth, trying to find the right words and failing so pathetically “Of course not!” She cried once she was able to speak properly, shaking away the shock, something Heidi hasn’t been able to do. “Her dad died last winter but he was very sick! Where did you even hear that?” 

Heidi just winced at the idea of someone so whimsical, sensitive and overall nice like Crystal just straight up murdering someone, and that was only the first impression she gathered from her. It was ridiculous to even consider that someone might be her father. After their catastrophic reactions, Nicky smacked Dahlia’s arm. 

“Ow! What did you do that for?!” She rubbed the affected area, staring at her friend deeply offended. 

While Nicky raised her hand up to her face as the classic non verbal ‘Talk to the hand’ answer, Jaida actually gave her a reason “Because that rumor is dumb and pointless! You didn’t have to ask them!” 

“Not only that, it’s terrifying” Widow scratched her neck, laughing humorously with a concerned expression on her face. The others mirrored her action as the air in the room grew uncomfortable. “Anyways, is that all you wanted to ask? Because—“ 

“No. We want the whole story. What’s the 411?” Dahlia once more interrupted the other person speaking. Widow blinked several times with her mouth agape and a finger raised, only to lower it into a slightly exasperated expression. Gigi was far away from the conversation happening in front of her, her mind wandering about how they were going to decorate the common room this year. A thud that vibrated from inside one of the rooms above startled her, bringing her back to her current reality. 

“I think you should find that out by yourself, Dahlia” Heidi shrugged, a tiny smile on her lips “They’re nice and don’t bite… even though one of them looks like she does” 

Dahlia’s face dropped in disappointment and Gigi knew she was going somewhere else after they were finished there to ask her friends on other classes on anything they might know on the new girls, even though last time that happened she was involved in a murder plot allegation. 

“Well it was nice talking to you ladies, but we’ve both got a lot of things to unpack. And I’m guess you do, too” Widow excused her and her roommate back into their bedroom. The group of four stood there and watched them leave, catching an interaction. 

“Crystal! What are you doing on the floor?!” Heidi gasped, pushing Widow out of the way to rush inside the bedroom. Widow rolled her eyes with a smile and walked inside after her, closing the door after. 

“Well, at least you know one of them is named Crystal” Nicky turned to an upset Dahlia with a cheeky smile, gaining a sloppy slap back on her arm as a way to express her disappointment. Unlike her friends, Gigi stored the new information in mind and mindlessly walked behind her friends, scavenging deep in her mind for ideas on how to decorate her dorm, trying to remember where in her bag she left the magazine clippings she had for inspiration. 

Later that night, she laid in bed staring at the ceiling, paying close attention to the sounds that surrounded her; the soft breathing her sleeping friends produced, the crickets chirping and the distant sounds the lake and its ecosystem produced. Each night she arrived there was the same, in the best way possible. Gigi took a deep breath in and closed her eyes, swearing to herself it was going to be a goode year, regardless of what adversities could come her way. 

“You’re late” Nicky pointed out from her bed in the left corner of the room, looking over her magazine to stare at Gigi, who swung her backpack to someplace else. The first day decided to be against her internal wishes, starting out her school year with the wrong foot forward. “I thought your lessons ended at four” 

“They did! But I already have three introductory projects for tomorrow! I’m totally buggin’!” The redhead whined as her friend Nicky sat up to face them, setting down an old edition of People magazine that she picked from Gigi’s collection without her consent, but neither thought much of it. Gigi took a peek and her heart sunk at the cover. ‘Murder of a Fashion King’ it said, with a picture of Gianni Versace and Cindy Crawford, posing together in a 1992 event. 

Just like anyone else who dreamed of working with fashion giants in their future, the death of an icon such as Versace had struck both Gigi and Nicky hard. It was unexpected, unfair. The most bone chilling part was the fact he was killed at his own doorstep. If Cunanan had arrived just a bit later, Gigi wouldn’t have received a call from Nicky at 8 AM on a warm summer morning, shrieking and crying out the news. 

“Me too!” Jaida announced from the door, huffing in as well “Art history, english literature and debate! This ain’t fun!” She threw the door shut behind her to not startle the rest of the girls in their dorm block. 

“We have an english lit project? I’m soo going to fail this year,” A voice groggily replied from under the crumpled duvet. “I don’t want to play this junior year shit anymore” 

“No duh! You weren’t even there this morning!” Jaida complained, her bag hitting the floor with a plop! “You can’t expect to have at least a B if you’re not there!” She stood behind Nicky, who was leaning back on her bed frame.  

“What are you doing in AP english lit anyways?” Gigi wondered, looking up at her friend who sat up and stretched, rubbing her eyes awake. 

“She cheated her way to it” Nicky shrugged. Gigi vividly remembered Dahlia asking her to rip out the built inseam out of her skirt, sew it up again and leave it hollow. Gigi just agreed to it and did so, thinking she just wanted less length off the piece just like so many people before her had asked, only to find out it was the place she stuffed in her cheating tricks and mechanisms. If Gigi knew it was going to be like that, she would have never agreed to sow anything in the first place. Sometimes she was a goody two shoes, but most of time she wasn’t; she knew if Dahlia started cheating on all her exams something like that would happen “She ended the year with an A plus and ended up there” 

“I didn’t know they were splitting us up! I couldn’t handle regular english literature, how am I supposed to handle the advanced placement? I barely know my ABCs” Dahlia cried dramatically, throwing herself back into the bed, her body bouncing back slightly. 

“I’m barely passing myself, you’re going to handle this one on your own” Jaida looked her way with her arms crossed, getting another groan as a reply. She averted her eyes to Gigi, who looked back and caught on the idea instantly, but it was too late. “Dibs on the window desk!” And without a warning, Jaida sprinted across the room, almost knocking down Nicky back to her bed. 

“Not fair!” Gigi groaned, picking up her bag to head towards the other desk, the one that contained poor lightning compared to the other, that had both natural and artificial light coming from the lamp above. 

After sitting, the room got sucked into silence. Music was felt from another room, bass banging through. While Nicky read a magazine as she did all her homework quickly as soon as class finished, both Gigi and Jaida were concentrated on their homework. Dahlia sat besides Jaida catching up with the class she missed and the fundamentals for the project. Dahlia groaned at Jaida when she said she already had a partner for the english literature project. 

“I’m sorry, I can’t depend on you! I didn’t even know you were in the class until the teacher passed assistance” Jaida replied to her complaints. The room was silently curious in whom this person was, Jaida kept her partner and group working circle very tight, to avoid leeches; people who just sucked the energy and the work out of her without making an effort.

“Geege” Nicky called, gaining her friend’s attention.  “Why so many magazine clippings of Julia Roberts?” She raised the fragile paper, taking it out of the tin case where all her magazine clippings were kept. 

Gigi’s back sprung up, her breath jagged in her throat while looking back at her friend. While her friends barely seemed phased or even bothered, they were bright red alarms blaring on her mind. ‘They found your secret gay agenda…’ A voice sung in maliciousness ‘They’re going to hate you forever’ The little devil in her mind reminded her with all the wrong intentions, making her shiver. 

“Oh, nothing. I just like her style” She played it off, looking away from Nicky, who just shrugged and placed the clippings away, continuing with her search for another magazine to busy herself in reading. 

While her friends saw her complete her homework in serenity, Gigi’s mind was wiring with concern. Same thing happened while she took a shower, as she replied to the conversations and ate mindlessly through dinner. She kept thinking about the horrible mistake committed earlier.