Idea-Etiquette Tips For the Idea-Giver (2:3)
[Part 2 of 3]
[Go back to Part 1: Thoughts on Etiquette around Idea Giving/Pitching & Receiving]
All the onus is on you, baby! You'll notice that I'm suggesting many more tips around idea-etiquette for the idea-giver than an idea-receiver! But, it is *your* idea, after all.
On *Having* an idea: seriously, that's great! congratulations! I'm proud of you! Having an idea feels really good. Atleast, I hope it felt good. Because you need to have more. Many more. I've read research that the higher the raw volume of ideas that you have, the higher the percentage of good ideas is. Makes sense to me! You probably get better at unconsciously understanding what a "promising" idea (let's refrain from "good" & "bad") looks like - one most likely to succeed in this harsh world - and start generating more of them. So, go at it, generate more ideas. Trust me, this will also be the critical factor to you remaining happy in the ideation process. If you have more than one idea, you are less likely to be so personally invested in any single idea that you are mortally wounded the moment someone bashes one of your prized ideas. Of course, we all have our favorite children though. ;)
On *Sharing* an idea: ok, you've had tons of babies, given the advice above. Now you believe it is time to send one of them out into the world. I propose asking yourself some questions:
1. How personally invested am I in this idea? Would I be willing to stay up for days straight working non-stop to make it happen? Or do I just think it is a good one and would like to see it happen somehow, even if not done by me? I think this is important for you to consciously think about beforehand. Because when you share an idea, people are going to pick up on various signals about how invested in your own idea you are - whether you've thought about it or not. Also, it is important to understand whether you are interested in being personally involved in the idea as it comes to fruition. If you aren't - and that's fine (i.e. you're suggesting Starbucks add a new drink to the menu or something) - you need to understand that you're going to have to limit how disappointed you are legally allowed to be if nothing ends up happening with the idea. It is just life. Also, "credit" may eventually be associated with something. 99% of the time, this is associated with the result of an idea coming to fruition, not the idea itself. There are some pithy quotes about this and about how much effort each of these things takes, hehe. So, it is fine if you don't want to be part of the fruition-part of the idea, but, again, you'll need to limit your expectations about "credit" then.
2. Am I sure this is the right time to share the idea? Have I really done all that I could/should for my baby to give it the best chance to survive in the world? I've found that there are times you may need to sit on an idea for a while longer (heh, like an egg, heh!), give it more time to develop in your own brain. And then there are other times you have a violent, guttural urge to get it out there *NOW*. So both situations are fine. But it is important to know you've done all you can for it in that moment when you're sharing it. I gotta tell you, idea-receivers are not always polite (hence me begging for reform around the etiquette in this area!). They are 99% likely not to care about the idea as much as you do. And, they're probably not as visionary about it as you are either (again, they probably don't care as much as you do, so don't want to put in the effort to envision where it could go). From what I can tell, very few idea-receivers will have any idea what to do upon receiving a pure "idea." I think probably only VC's and executives have trained their ability for this, but I've also found there are some moments when idea-receivers are just in a particularly "open" mind-frame and willing to receive your idea (good luck finding these!). Most times, the general idea-receiving community is gonna need more than that. Give them something physical that they can't ignore, something they can see or feel or play with. For example, I'm pretty certain if I had told more than a small handful of close friends that I was building the #selfiestation, people would have said it was a *terrible* waste of time. But there is something that is very hard to ignore once you get caught up in the act of seeing people sharing their faces & start sharing your own. Now, I understand you're busy. You may not have the time to "realize" your idea in some form. Or you just may not be that personally invested in it (see above). But, again, it is important to know that ahead of sharing, because then you can limit your disappointment if it doesn't end up succeeding. Also, you should be mindful about whether now is the right time to share your idea with any particular idea-receiver! This could be as simple as asking "are you busy?" and waiting for an answer before jumping to "I have an idea for you to hear!"
3. What am I hoping for by telling this particular person about this particular idea? Figuring out what you expect / want from the other person saves a lot of time in the ideation-process. For example, if you just need some positive encouragement from a friend to ramp up your own enthusiasm so you'll be able to continue working on it in your basement (which you'll do either way), that is very very different from hoping that they'll give you money to work on it, which is very very different from hoping THEY'LL work on it. Because, however busy you think you are, they think they are *way* busier. So this is the hardest outcome of all to achieve. Knowing *that* going in will limit your disappointment if you fail. Also, if you know what you want, you can also tell them this before sharing or give them that feedback if the sharing session doesn't seem to be going in the direction that you want it to be going in (ex: they start trying to change the subject and tell you their amazing ideas instead). Also know if one of the things you're *not* looking for from this person is feedback / improvements on the original idea. That will enable you to shut that shit down as soon as it starts happening, if you don't want it to! :) Though, you *may* consider being open to it and/or exploring why you wouldn't be.
4. How can I make this idea more personally appealing for this particular person? How can I make them feel that they co-own the idea with me - i.e. it is now their baby too? This is pretty tricky. I'm still exploring this. But I think what I'm finding is that if you can't come up with *something*, you may have picked the wrong person to tell. Luckily, you still have the option of picking a different person to share with!
5. What's my fallback plan for when this sharing-shit doesn't work? :p It is pretty likely some shit is going to go downnnnnn in your sharing-session. Probably because the idea-receiver isn't following any kind of idea-receiving etiquette (whether from here or otherwise)... So what's the new plan, Stan? If you still believe you made the right decision to share (given the answers to all of the above), just pick a different person! Although, I'm starting to find this blogging thing useful in that it frees you up from putting too much on sharing with one particular person. But it is in no way a replacement to me reaching out to individuals through other means. Be ready to invoke this plan if the receiver doesn't support your idea (hopefully they do that following some general etiquette, such as below, but you can't be sure of it). Also be ready to invoke this plan if the receiver doesn't indicate, in some reasonable amount of time, whether he / she will support the idea. Though it is probably best not to start a countdown or share that ticking clock with the receiver if you do. ;)
[Continue to Part 3: Idea-Etiquette Tips For the Idea-Receiver]













