9 Things You Donât Know About Dating An Architect
âARCHITECTS MAKE A LOT OF MONEY.â
This is not true. (But people assume it is.)
ARCHITECTS ARE USED TO LATE NIGHTS.
In theory, it shouldnât be a problem to stay up all night for sexytime. But in reality, they probably pulled an all-nighter last night and are ready to crash at 8 tonight.
THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A FAT ARCHITECT.
For some reason. I have no idea.
THINGS YOU NEVER EVEN KNEW EXISTED ARE NOW THE MOST IMPORTANT. THING. EVER.
âThat is the ugliest f*cking radiator everâ, âHow did they not align the light switch with the outlet?â âWhatâs your favorite kind of hinge?â âWhatâs your favorite CAD command?â
THEYâRE PROBABLY ANAL.
They probably have one of three âsystemsâ for organizing their bookshelves: by color, by size (largest to smallest), by publisher. None of these make any sense and ironically provide the very opposite of âorderâ, but it doesnât matter, because it looks better. In fact, they will have a âsystemâ for everything, including organizing the fridge and how to put their clothes away. You might think itâs cute at first, an endearing quirk â until you realize how much of their precious little free time is consumed by obsessing over things that a) no one cares about and b) does not enhance their lives in any way.
AFTER A WHILE, YOU WILL ONLY HANG OUT WITH ARCHITECTS.
This happens. Hope you donât just love your architect, but that you love ALL architects.
ARCHITECTS HANDLE RELATIONSHIP/LIFE STRESS WELL.
Because anything is less stressful than a deadline.
YOU WONâT GET STUDIO.
Prepare yourself for constant references to this mysterious place called âstudioâ that they spent every waking moment of their college lives in, and never being let on on the inside jokes, with explanations like âyou had to be thereâ or âit was a lot funnier at four in the morning.â
THEY WILL BE COFFEE SNOBS.
If itâs not organically grown, economically sustainable and socially consciously harvested, and brewed in a vintage French Press OR a Chemex, chances are, they might politely decline your coffee. Until, four minutes later, they realize theyâre caffeine deprived and, ethics be damned, this presentation needs to get to Dubai by 1AMâŠ
ARCHITECTS ARE PASSIONATE, DEDICATED PEOPLE.
They didnât get through 5 years of architectural school by being lazy, indifferent and stupid. (Need a first date conversation starter? Ask them about how many people dropped out of their program freshman year â theyâll be all too proud to tell you that âthey were one of the fewâ who made it out unscathed.â) They know just enough about every culturally relevant artist, philosopher, composer etc to make them seem exceptionally worldly and cultured â your parents should love them. Keep in mind that itâs all a facade (no pun intended!) and that if you were to press them on any one of those topics, theyâll find a way to skillfully manipulate the conversation into some abstract âconceptâ and avoid being called out on not knowing shit.