Scary Reality
I'm not going to be accepted by a large portion of the Trans community. Let me explain. I was doing my usual scroll on Tik Tok, trying to disconnect from my crappy overwhelming reality, when I came across a detransitioner video. I was intrigued because I had know a friend to detransition 5/6 years after coming out to us at the age of 12/13. I went in to their comment section and I realized just how unwelcomed I truly am. I am genderfluid, meaning that sometimes I do identify with the gender I was assigned at birth. That means some days I'm cis, however that isn't constant nor is it truly often. Many days I feel like I lack a gender or I'm a mix of male and female, with a sprinkle in of opposite gender at birth. My gender changes and I never truly know when I'll be cis, but it is possible. Well the detransitioner was referring to how they speak on trans topics (their experiences) because they lived as a trans person for about 10 years and had Gender Dysmorphia (GD). WE all know that to be trans you don't have to have GD, but so many people just kept saying they were a confused Cis, and had always been Cis. So many said that Gender isn't fluid and that they were attention seeking. That people or either cis or trans. I just feel like, I'm not allowed to talk about trans issues, but at the same time be discriminated like a trans person and a cis person. I get hatred from both sides and it's just hard because one side will say that I can't change my gender and the other side will say that I was just confused. I'm not confused. I know that I am Gender Fluid....but with the way there are so many people saying that it's not real...I feel like maybe it would be best to hide away from everyone, that way no one could hate me, although the pain would remain indefinitely.
