And so we were staying at our aunt and uncles hotel which is gorgeous, but my aunt cut her toe open on our 2nd day and had to have stitches which meant we all had to help out, admittedly i didn't help as much as my brothers. But it still really affected the holiday because they weren't around as much, which also concentrated the noelness of the holiday.
And Calum is staying there to work for a month, which i thought wouldn't make me so emotional because i won't be at home anyway, but still i cried and the whole way home and now theres like a big chunk missing and it is horrible.
And now i am back, and i'm back at placement on wednesday and for whatever reason i feel like crap, not just because Calum is gone. I don't know if it's because i have had too much time to think while on holiday or what, wallowing in my own sadness. And for some reason at the moment i am becoming so affected by other peoples sadness that i do not know what to do with myself, the majority of the time there is absolutely nothing i can do either. But currently theres a few people, super close to me as well as people i barely know and their sadness has affected me so much and i just cannot do anything about it.
I think I either need to actually have a super power to make people happy or just be able to fix things for them naturally or maybe i just need to talk to someone or maybe i should fuck it and get me some wine.