#hogwarts talks

(Severus x Y/N)

Severus: *finally tells his partner about what the marauders did to him at school

Y/N: *silently and scribbles something on a piece of paper

Severus: ... May I know what you're scribbling there?

Severus: *takes the piece of paper and sees a breakdown of the price of lime and the price of bodies on the black market

Severus: ... I appreciate it darling, but it's better to keep such things in your head

(Dad Severus x Y/N)

Snape's child: *Watches the animated Sleeping Beauty. Maleficent appears on the screen

Maleficent: *she resembles a big bat in appearance

Snape's child: *looks at the screen

Snape's child: *looks at his father's robe left on the chair

Snape's child: *points at the screen

Snape's child: it's DAD!

(Severus x Y/N-Teacher)

Y/N: *stands in the corridor and admires is Snape's robe moves behind him as he makes his rounds

Severus: You are staring at me.

Y/N: You walk around like a fucking diva, how would I look away?

Severus *little noticeable smile: ... Focus on your work, Y/L/N.

(Severus x Y/N-Teacher)

Severus & Y/N: *sitting in Severus' living room on Valentine's Day evening.

Y/N: *counts Valentine's Day cards addressed to Severus

Y/N *giggles: this is creepy

Severus *looks up with a slight smile: Oh yeah?

Severus: *has long since finished counting the cards addressed to Y/N

Y/N *smiles: You could be their father! I've already counted 50! How many are addressed to me?

Severus: 25

Y/N: That's scary, too

Y/N: *raises eyes to the potions master

Y/N: Why are you smiling like that?

Severus: Because you're about to get even more scared

Y/N: *smiles and puts down the cards.

Y/N: *takes a seat on Severus' lap.

Y/N: Oh yeah? Keep talking

Severus: *takes another Valentine's Day card from his pocket and hands it to the teacher

Severus: 26

Y/N: *kisses him

Y/N *says at his lips also pulling out a card: Fifty-something

Severus: I won, I have more

Y/N: No honey, I won

You: I hate men...

Severus: Good to hear it.

You: Shut up, it's because of men's beauty canons that I have to do this gymnastics.

You: *she goes to the kitchen with depilatory cream on her legs*

Severus: *He sighs and pulls out a wand*

Severus: *He goes to the kitchen and casts a spell on the woman*

*The cream disappears and so does the hair*

Severus: Satisfied?

You: ...

You: We've been together TWO YEARS and you're only now telling me there's A SPELL FOR IT???!!!

Severus: So you don't.

Using this gif was stronger than me xddd

(Severus x Y/N)

*family movie night*

Guest on the show: *first in a rage pushes the woman so that she hits her head on the edge. He understands what he has done, panics, but decides to finish the job and chokes the woman. Later he fakes an accident on the canoe

Your daughter: But stupid, if he already hit her he should finish with a stone. There will be traces left after the strangling

Y/N: Exactly

Severus: Daughter...

His daughter: What?

Severus: It's scary to sit with you, since you're correcting murderers on the screen. Go have a chew before going to bed. You play delicate, and you would murder people with stones

His daughter *smiling: Dad, women from an early age are taught how to wash blood off all sorts of materials

His daughter *obediently heads to bed, but even before leaving the room she adds: And I don't want to say anything, but Mom agreed with me. Good night!

Severus: ... I begat a monster with the face of an angel.

Y/N *sipping tea: At least you know that if necessary, she knows how to dispose of the body and clean up the blood

Severus: ... Just like you

Y/N *smiles: Just like me

(Severus x Y/N)

Y/N: *falls on the bed and screams into the pillow

Severus: What the hell is going on?

Y/N *with a muffled voice through the pillow: God, I finished reading the book and I don't know what to do with myself. I experienced catharsis and I don't know how to continue to function with the thought that this is the end of the story.... This end is good, but I don't want the end

Severus: ... *starts stroking her hair

Severus: Shall I read it aloud to you again?

Y/N: *looks at him with big eyes full of love

Y/N: I love you

----------

(Severus x Y/N)

Y/N: *it's 2:00 a.m. and she's reading a book in bed*

Sever: *utters, just finished potions for the school flu epidemic*

Sever: *comes over and takes her book*

Y/N: Hey, give it back!

Sever: We go to sleep Moth, you will finish in the morning. Goodnight. *kisses her on the forehead and turns off the light to go to sleep*