#highest weight

AND i have a gain week starting tomorrow so likely will smash past my highest then >.<

Starting over again is SUCKS but I have to

Jan 12. 253, kinda happy no gain! I wanna get to 250 soon.

And yeah, it kinda sucks. Pictures show up on timehop of me a year ago, or a few years ago, and I'm like damn I had lost so much weight then compared to now. I've never been skinny by any means, but I was on a really good track for a long time - and this past year I fell off hard. I moved to a new state by myself and got my first teaching job. I'm a stress eater. And boy was this a stressful year. And boy did I let myself eat. I knew I had gained weight, but I didn't realize how much I had gained until my birthday. I went to an amusement park - I love rollercoasters. Well, this year I was the girl that could barely get strapped into rollercoasters. Like two people holding me in as another person strapped me down. And that was embarrassing. I had never had that problem in my life. But I was very proud of myself. They would ask me "Are you okay?" With a concerned face, and I just smiled and said yes. Even with others watching on like oh no that poor girl barely fits. A few years ago, I would have cried on the first coaster and left the park immediately. This day I said hey, it's my birthday and I want to ride rollercoasters. And I did. And it was rough to not fit well on some of them, but I did not let it ruin my day. Though I still had a good birthday, it was still a massive wake up call. I do not ever want to experience not fitting in a rollercoasters seat again. Since then I've joined weight watchers again, which is a program I really like. I've lost a pound and a half so far. Not much, but it's a start! I think it's interesting that two people now have been shocked to hear that I'm at my highest weight. First my mom was surprised to hear that, she couldn't believe it was true. Then I told one of my best friends and she said "What??? Honestly I thought you lost weight. Like I thought you were probably at your lowest weight. Are you sure you're at your highest?" It was kind of nice to hear that people don't look at me and go "Woah...Heather really let herself go this year." But I was also like - why do people think I have lost weight? Honestly, I think it's how I present myself. Which is weird. But I think it's true. I have gained loads of confidence in the last few years. I'm still not the most confident person around, but my confidence is through the roof compared to any other year of my life. And I've finally learned how to pick the right clothes to show off my style and flatter my body. I used to wear baggy clothes and black and nothing but yoga pants and try to hide myself. Now I wear more colorful, fitting clothes. Anyway, I doubt anyone will read all of this. But I was just thinking, and wanted to share. I appreciate all of you, this tumblr community always helps me get back on track. Have a great day!

So, anyway, posting a comparison here of my lowest adult weight when I was 23 years old (I had lost 100 pounds on a low fat, 1000 calorie a day diet -needless to say, I gained it all back fairly quickly as soon as I started eating normally again. Don’t do this, folks! It will fuck you up!), vs. my highest, and my current.