#herushingu

A story in response to @herushingu / @scintillant-h story “Okay”

----------

“Why”

She felt his movements above her. It would come to an end soon.

But why?

Why was this happening to them? What did she do to deserve this? What did he do to deserve this? She sucked in a breath to try to stop the tears from coming.

But then she knew. She had been selfish. She had been a whore, a slut. To think she once had for a moment thought it would be okay to love a priest of the Lord, a holy man when she was nothing but trash herself. She sucked in a breath. To think she could have thought it was okay to flirt, to hold, to caress, to love someone so unbearably much but knew he couldn’t do anything in return.  She tortured him.

She had been the thorn in his flesh.

She had been his Delilah to his Samson.

Maggie shut her eyes. “Please just do it, damn it please!”  She wanted to cry but her lips were trembling and couldn’t utter a sound. All Maggie ever wanted was to love and be loved and she had found that with Alexander. A man had never ever treated her right except him. He would scold her like a father. Her dead heart shrunk. Alexander believed in her, he appreciated her, and he loved her for herself despite how odd she was. Her own father never treated her that way. Tears trickled down her pale cheeks; Alexander had been there for her, held her when she need to be comforted, in his strong warm embrace she had felt safe and loved, wanted.  That is all Maggie ever wanted herself was to stay with him, she didn’t care if they couldn’t be romantic. She loved him, she just wanted to be near him, to hear him, to feel him and to help him when she knew he was breaking on the inside when his load was to much to bare on his own.

But no. They couldn’t have that. God forbid she was allowed to have one ounce of happiness in her life. God forbid he was allowed to love someone aside from the Lord. She cursed herself. She knew she was angry and talking nonsense. It wasn’t His fault was it?

No it was her fault. She deserved this. She deserved to become a monster. It was her fault for not listening to the priest’s warning about going to that place at night. It was her fault for ignoring him and going there to dance anyway. It was her fault that she couldn’t wait for him. It was her fault for dressing the way she did, that is why men hit on her so much.  It was all her fault that the vampire chose her that night to end her life.

She felt movement again she could hear the holy blade humming above her pale bitten neck.

“Do it.” She wanted to say but she just couldn’t move her lips. She knew a scream a cry would come out. And she couldn’t do it, not to herself not to him. She clenched her fists as she felt droplets of rain come from the cloudless night sky. Her tears came down harder, her fists clenched till her knuckles cracked.

Then, that sound. That god awful sound

Her eyes snapped open as she saw her pale hands covered in blood. She turned her head towards Anderson. Her crimson eyes widened. She jumped and grabbed him, to stop as he tore through his own flesh with his holy blade. She reached for his face but he pushed her aside and she went crashing to the floor.

“Stop it my god stop it Alexander!” She screamed. Maggie stood up and tried to get him but it was too late. Blood and body parts were everywhere. Maggie was shaking as she ran past an arm and leg, stumbling as she did so. She collapsed before him, shaking. With bloody tears coming down her face, she picked him up his head and held him close to her chest.  He spoke in a hoarse hardly audible voice but she heard every word. Maggie let out sob and just brought him closer. She didn’t deserve him, she never had. She had deserved to be killed. Her fingers stroked his scar and her lips pressed against his forehead.

Not now but soon.

She would piece him together, hold him each time. Enjoying every second she had with him that she could possible have.

But in the end they knew they were be separated by a holy blade, she couldn’t let him go down with her.

So she would one day take the blade herself and end it all.

But not now,….not yet.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hellsing Ultimate

Hellsing Ending Full

Shine by mrbig

Lyrics:

I never really feel quite right And I don’t know why, all I know is something’s wrong Every time I look at you, you seem so alive

Tell me how do you do it, walk me through it I’m following every footstep

Maybe on your own you take a conscious step Do you wanna give it up? All that I want

Is for you to shine Shine down on me Shine on this life that’s burning out

I say a lot of things sometimes that don’t come out right And I act like I don’t know why I guess a reaction’s all I was looking for, yeah

You looked through me, you really knew me like no one’s ever looked before

Maybe on your own you take a cautious step Do you wanna give it up? All that I want

Is for you to shine Shine down on me Shine on this life that’s burning out

I know, I know, girl you got something

SHINE (shine it on to me) Shine down on me (I wanna feel it) Shine on this life that’s burning out

Maybe on your own you take a cautious step Do you wanna give it up? All that I want

Is for you to shine Shine down on me (just show me something) Shine on this life that’s burning out (you give me something that I’ll never know)

Shine (it gonna kill me, if you give something away) Shine yeah (I wanna know what’s going in on your mind) Shine on this life that’s burning out

Cosplay: Seras Victoria (Serasu Vikutoria)