deleting old photos & videos before my phone runs out of storage (a small archive for myself)
my brother does a pirouette
blackboard of the GSA meeting room says, “holiday survival kit: you’re not in the closet, you’re undercover”
bernie sanders comes to town
post-election, a friend & i write the blandest solidarity statement in sidewalk chalk in front of the school, drawing dozens of chalk signatures, backlash from students & parents, and a series of schoolwide conversations
a friend & i realize we look exactly like each other with a genderswap face filter (she later tells me that this sped up her transition)
i am voted most likely to come back and teach at my high school
at my first college party, we eat pancakes and write a zine that we will never print
queer elders from a church i have not attended in many years come to provide hugs & protest songs at court
grocery store shelves are empty
hundreds sit down in the middle of a highway by the police station
twenty-one herbs and spices from the dollar store
the acrylic paint on the grass has not washed off in the rain & the landlord comes tomorrow
an apple cake which is an apology that i give to my old roommates after missing an important meeting
a lamb is born
learning to drive via the farm golf cart
contest to see who can make the most yonic loaf of banana bread
our flower-mobile stops at a hospital on saturday afternoons
learning about mycelia from an old man who is a friend of a friend, who we stay with on a road trip in north carolina, who upon meeting us says, “girls, have you heard about the mushrooms?”
air thick with cicadas
on a restroom wall: “listen, most of us could have ended up in medicine making better money”
sharing a notes doc with classmates at a pre-exam party for a decolonial studies lecture (a year later, i learn that people are still sharing the notes doc, which includes plenty of random bullshit bullet-point conversations between me & friends which they must scroll through to get to the course content — i check the doc and our old conversations have been left untouched)
a friend finds a pair of purple-and-blue heelys, which i left for her in the women’s center just before the pandemic hit, in perfect condition two years later
three people attend my class’s public performance of “key texts in ethnic studies” — these three people are our professor, the founder of the palestine museum, and my mother
biking past ACAB on my way to work
painting someone’s nails in a hammock proves difficult but possible
(screenshot) a lake street dive song; humming this song is a summer victory for a family member & opens up new ways for us to communicate
(screenshot) spreadsheets are finalized at my cousins’ house while they agree to host my family in an urgent situation
a thousand dollars’ worth of gardening gloves from home depot
crying with friends on the walk home after seeing everything everywhere all at once
hiding a box of cookies in a friend’s room, to inform him of if he ever is sad or mad at me (it works)
a friend & I wear wristbands from different concerts on the first night I call 911
hanging laundry from the windows eleven stories high
writing the lyrics to all star on my hand because my friend’s band needs a substitute lead singer
dressed as a teabag for the annual mozart requiem halloween singalong
sneaking into the dining hall for midnight cereal
getting the password to the largest lecture hall on campus from a former council president & using it for a reality tv night
adding my visitor name tag to the hundreds of name tags people have stuck to a telephone pole by the hospital on the second night I call 911
there is a double rainbow on the day of my first therapy appointment
(screenshot) a friend & i make plans to see thao & the get down stay down on june 17, 2070
a friend forges a sign for my dorm room door so as to make it appear that i am a senior & can remain in my room until graduation (it works)
learning that we can sneak into the moma without actually doing so
sneaking onto the balcony of a concert hall without having learned that we are sneaking
the most affordable thrift store in the east village, across from the least affordable thrift store in the east village
watching bee & puppycat with a friend on the train on our way to the opera
(screenshot) friends offer to visit me as I finish my finals in the next town over
a train passes by the window at daycare, which is very exciting for the two-year-olds & becomes a main topic of conversation for them for the next few weeks
an old friend who is visiting town has run into me on the street & we have decided to immediately attend the first event we can find which turns out to be a competitive poetry slam
fireflies
