#hedone 01.

Thanatos:  Though he had recovered quickly from his and Melinoe’s last awkward exchange, upon being asked by Hedone to dance with her for some event or other she was putting on an odd, uncomfortable feeling that he couldn’t name (nor wanted to) had settled in his gut that he quickly ignored.  And though a part of him he was ignoring feared a recurrence of what had happened the last time he was around Melinoe, not wanting to be rude and deny the other goddess a favor, he had agreed without hesitation.  When they day came, he had shown up early, forgetting his discomfort and sporting the same polite smile he always wore as he waited for the two goddesses to arrive and let him know what it was he had to do in order to assist with the event Hedone was putting on.

Melinoe: Mel arrived, per Hedone's invitation, in just as awkward of a mood as Thanatos. However there was a difference to her uncomfortable behavior this time around. She wasn't frustrated in the usual sense at being put in the position of dancing with Thanatos again, but she was concerned about the not they had left on when he had stopped by her office to be patched up. Then on top that was her more expected discomfort. The one that had her wondering just what sort of dance Hedone intended for the pair of them to perform, and the anxiety of doing so in front of so many people when she typically preferred to hide into the shadows. Also having arrived early as she was prone to do, Mel stood beside Thanatos chewing her lip and looking at the ground as she waited for Hedone to join them.

Hedone:  Hedone had requested this only because she needed a pair who would listen to her orders and well, Melinoe and Thanatos were fitting for her needs. Plus she had informed them that she'd be able to pull some strings and get them a freshly dead body if they obliged. And so they did. She entered the dance room clearly amused at the fact that the two were standing quite akawardly. "Alright, first off, those shoes and clothing will not work. I brought some things that might fit both of you. Tee shirts, stretched pants and sneakers. Don't worry about the pricing, got it covered. So go, change, now." She ordered with her finger pointing in the direction of another set of doors. She was already geared up as she had music and everything prepared. The room was brightly lit with mirrors on both walls. She stretched herself as she waited for them to re-appear. This was going to be a long day.

Thanatos: Thanatos wasn't wholly unused to having orders shouted at him as it had been more than common during his residency but as he spent the majority of his time around dead bodies who couldn't speak at all let alone bark orders, he looked slightly alarmed at Hedone's immediate instructions, listed off without even so much as time for a breath between each one. Brows had furrowed too in confusion and curiosity at being told he had dressed inappropriately, not overly aware one required certain clothes to be able to dance.  But without voicing any of this, he simply did as he was asked, nodding politely before he disappeared, appearing a moment later looking entirely out of the ordinary in loose fitting clothes making him look even more gangly than usually. Unsure of what he was supposed to do exactly, he simply stood there smiling, looking to Hedone for instructions.

Melinoe:  Mel frowned at the clothes, but she did and Hedone said; taking the clothes into a nearby bathroom and putting them on. Her own clothes had been comfortable enough, but the shoes were a little better at least. Emerging from the bathroom, Mel moved to stand beside Thanatos once more and looked at Hedone expectantly. She'd honestly prefer to get this over with really, and for once it had nothing to do with Thanatos.

Hedone:  Hedone nodded, pleased that they had listened up and hurried along. She clapped her hands together and motioned them to spread apart from each other. "We're starting with stretches. Watch I'll demonstrate." She brought her hands down all the way to the floor as her back was arched. And then she proceeded to roll back up and work out her thighs by alternating one leg grab to the other. "I want to see you two sweat," she said as she breathed for a couple of seconds before turning around to flip the music on. "Let's go you two," she waited hoping that they would be able to perform the simple task at hand.

Thanatos:  Idly Thanatos wondered why Hedone seemed to be under the impression that neither one of he or Melinoe seemed to know how to stretch properly, but he said nothing.  He didn't think it would be very polite to interrupt her and it wasn't as if it made much difference whether she knew he knew how to stretch or not.  So instead he simply smiled and nodded, mimicking Hedone's actions.

Melinoe:  Melinoe on the other hand did not choose to refrain her comment. "Honestly, Hedone; we might be doctors, but that hardly means we don't know how to stretch." There was no offense or anger in her words, despite the small roll of her eyes. She fell in line soon enough though, loosening her limbs. Still if Hedone wanted to see her sweat they might be there for a while. This mortal body wasn't prone to heavy sweating, no matter how hard she worked it.

Hedone: "Correctly?" Hedone arched an eyebrow. There were diligent workers, she knew that but there was a certain finesse to the whole fitness aspect that she herself knew was difficult. She moved closer to the pair, fixing their postures and positioning them in the right stance. "Shoulders back, it should really burn when you're pulling out and using all those muscles. Might burn a bit." She said lightly. "Feeling the heat yet?" Hedone was used to having hours upon hours of intense training but she was still a little worried for the two who spent most of their time playing with the dead than physical body work.

Thanatos:  Eyes had widened in polite curiosity as Melinoe spoke up, eyes flickering between the two women, watching the exchange as though it were an interesting television program.  "We are doctors you know?  Technically.  I can guarantee we know more about anatomy than you do, and what muscles do what and how to stretch them."  As usual with Thanatos, words that could be taken rudely by nature were not said in a rude way, but simple as a statement of fact.  They may now deal with dead bodies almost exclusively, but they still had had to learn all the other stuff too.  And as soon as he'd said it, he went back to doing as she instructed.  He'd only been answering her question, that yes they...or at least he knew he knew how to stretch properly.  He was very intelligent despite certain evidence to the contrary and his woeful ignorance in many matters.

Melinoe:  Mel raised her eyebrows at the unexpected words that came from Thanatos; but then she merely gave an approving nod as she hitched a thumb in his direction, indicating her agreement. Even so she went about the stretches, only give a small "Mhm" in response to Hedone's question.

Hedone:  Hedone sighed amused that the two were bonding over stretching, especially Melinoe. After about fifteen minutes of warm ups, the blonde woman had decided to officially start. She clapped her hands together, "alright so first and foremost, I hope you two will be comfortable with each other because the routine I have in mind does involve the bare minimum of skin touching." She looked at the both of them, she wouldn't stand for any whiny complaints. All of them were adults anyways. "I'll start off with Melinoe and show you the first part of what I want you to do." And so, she brought her body, facing the mirror performed. It was nothing too complicated but it would take a couple of minutes to absorb. "Now for you Thanatos," you're going to have to mimic here and stand close behind her. Think you can do that?" Hedone asked.

Thanatos: At those words Thanatos cast a discretely wary glance in Melinoe's direction, ignoring that uncomfortable stirring in his stomach.  Really, he was not uncomfortable with the thought of having to be physically close to Melinoe...or at least he usually wouldn't have been.  After it had been brought to his attention that doing so was giving people the wrong idea, he had started to feel that awkwardness about the action that he normally wouldn't have.  But he had been very good once at drowning out such thoughts and feelings and he was determined to do so now.  So when it was his turn, he smiled politely at Hedone and nodded his head.  "Mhm.  I can do that."  But as he spoke, he did look pointedly anywhere but at Melinoe.

Melinoe:  Mel was terribly quiet in regard to the matter, but she gave a small nod. She had danced with the man before, so she was comfortable enough doing so again. However it was their last encounter that gave her pause. The way he had pulled away from her touch and thought she was patronizing him flashing through her mind. Returning her focus to Hedone, she watched the woman carefully and then began to copy her movements. "You're very talented," she commented seemingly at random. It was a simple enough dance thus far, but the woman had a way about her that Mel felt she would never be able to imitate, especially with this particular style of dance with which she was so unfamiliar.

Hedone:  At least they were complying to her request. And Melinoe was quick learner which was something Hedone appreciated greatly. The amount of times she had met pretty girls who were incompetent always gave her an eye roll. She smiled at her compliment, Hedone was never usually dancing, it was always her instructing in the background. "Thank you, you're doing very well on your feet." She watched as the two attempted to work out the positioning of the routine. "Let loose, I chose an interpretive free flowing piece so it wouldn't be as stressful on the rhythms and beats." She helped adjusted their movements again. "Alright to transition into the second part, I'm going need Thanatos to hold you by the waist and gently pick you up and move to this spot here," she tapped at the placement of a sticker to the pair's right. "Focus, don't laugh and do your best. It's going to be weird on the first try."

Thanatos:  Quietly from his place watching the both of them, he agreed with both women's sentiments.  Both of them were very fine dancers.  Of course, Thanatos knew this about Melinoe already as they'd shared a dance before, but this was a different sort of dance from their last one.  When the attention was directed to him, he couldn't avoid looking at Melinoe this time, but as much of his focus was on what moments he had to do, it was easy to forget his discomfort as he shot a smile her way, it only faltering when Hedone made mention of not laughing as he couldn't figure out what part of dancing would have been amusing.  But he shrugged it off before moving closer to Melinoe.  "Do you mind?"  He asked, unable to help himself, wanting to be absolutely sure she didn't mind him touching her, despite the fact that her agreeing as well was implied consent to that already.

Melinoe:  "No, it's fine.." she murmured softly, while attempting to shake off a sudden awkwardness. Laughing was the last thing Hedone had to worry about from the girl. If anything she was likely far too tense as they went through the movements. Finding it difficult to relax with Thanatos's hands on her as they had to be. "Sorry," she apologized to them both. "Probably just going to take me a minute." It wasn't too prolonged of contact though, so she was able to begin loosening up a little soon enough;  but unfortunately Mel felt like this would be an issue for every new move they took on.

Hedone:  Hedone could already sense the tension that was in the air between the two. But she watched patiently. Their moves were jerky, reflecting the nature of how they responded to her statement. "Alright, this is how you're going to have to hold her Thanatos," Hedone demonstrated as she had her own hands hovering over where Thanatos was. "Grab her like she's the most delicate thing in the world. Let her know that she can trust you," she instructed. Perhaps Hedone had no idea how her words might entail another meaning but she was saying all the typical things a dance instructer would. "And Melinoe, loosen up. Even a brief second of eye contact might help you feel more reassured that you won't fall on your face." She clapped her hands together. "Repeat again please."

Thanatos:  Thanatos's expression grew serious with concentration as he listened to Hedone's instructions, not wanting to mess up.  The event was for charity after all, and he didn't want to look silly for it when the time came and wanted to do things right.  But he really wished she didn't talk the way she did as she told him what to do...it made it harder for him to ignore the awkwardness between himself and Melinoe after their last encounter.  Yet her instructions were not hard to follow...Thanatos was gentle with everyone and treated everyone as though they were the most delicate thing in the world.  Following that instruction was easy as he put his hands back at her waist, eyes meeting hers with a soft, yet unreadable expression moving much more fluidly the second time around.  More fluidly no doubt than Hedone evidently thought a gangly awkward man like himself could move.

Melinoe:  Mel shook herself a bit before they attempted the move again, determined to force herself to relax. Taking Hedone's advice, Mel looked Thanatos in the eyes this time. When his hands came to her hips, Melinoe was fairly certain this had been the worst thing she could do. She was too aware now, and her heart skipped from what surely must have been nerves. Yet when he picked her up then, the pair were almost seamless and it looked as if Melinoe weighed nothing. For a moment Mel forgot that she could break eye contact now, but when she remember she was quick to look away and awkwardly cleared her throat.

Hedone:  They had managed to perform as she requested. Perhaps it would take a few more tries for them to get used to it but they were making quicker progress than she had expected. "Alright this is good. If you have questions speak up." The dance was simple and quick with repetitive motions so she decided to teach the last chunk together. "Alright so for the finale part, just like you did with the transition. I'm going to need this dramatic aura with it. Thanatos, you're going to twirl her and when the lights dim, you're going to gracefully hold her by her back and bring your face close to hers. It's going to last for about five seconds before it goes back on again. You might think your head is going to drop to the floor Melinoe but I'm sure Thanatos can accomplish that without any flaws. All you have to do is string your arms around his neck so in case anything happens, you have support. Remember, feet pointed and legs elongated. To make it look really nice, arch your back." She cued for them to begin, anxiously hoping that they wouldn't mess up the big finish. Thanatos:  Though he tried his best to ignore things from his past life, he could recall information when necessary, and just as he had on the night of the Rural Dionysia to dance with Melinoe, he was able to recall what knowledge he had of dancing again.  He might not look like a dancer in this life, but he could dance if he wanted to.  And again, he found her instructions to be easy to follow, and the effort used in following them a more than welcome distraction from other thoughts that threatened to cloud his mind.  Once more he was able to carry out the moves with shocking ease, holding Melinoe just as he was told to, face close to hers.  Just as he was told to do.

Melinoe: Mel was becoming more and more uncomfortable with this whole dance. Not the actual act of it, so much as her reaction to it. Just as Thanatos was doing, the girl attempted to push back memories of past lives. Ones that softened her toward the man one moment and embittered her toward him the next. In the end she performed the moves effortlessly, but there was a hint of sadness in her expression as Thantos's face hovered over her own. She doubted he would even realize, much less recall why. By the end of it, Mel stepped to the side allowing for space between them, and looking expectantly at Hedone.

Hedone:  Hedone didn't seem to pay any attention to the pair's exchanges as she clapped her hands together, pleased with their efforts. "Alright so I have the music that'll go with the choreography and I just need you guys to rehearse it again. With all the emotions you feel that's conveyed through the song. Do your best to match up to the beats but it shouldn't be too difficult." She quickly went over to the music player, hitting play as she counted down from three. Her own eyes were too busy scrutinizing for any last second flaws that might hinder the performance. Everything else went over her head.

Thanatos:   Just as Melinoe suspected, Thanatos noticed nothing at all in her expression.  With being focused on getting the moves right and making sure he was holding her properly and all of that coupled with the way he was already prone to blocking things out, the sadness in her expression went completely over his head.  Only when Hedone mentioned emotions did his focus wane and that nervousness started to creep back up.  He didn't want anything to do with emotions.  The last time he'd been forced to confront his emotions, he hadn't liked what happened.  But he did his best to focus on the music and the dance itself separate from his dance partner entirely, trying to just let long forgotten muscle memory take over for him.  Unfortunately, and predictably, that left a lot to be desired from his performance as he'd essentially done the exact opposite of what Hedone had told him to do and ignored emotions all together, making the dance look mechanical and forced as he began the dance with Melinoe as the music played.

Melinoe:  It was impossible to do much with the dance, Thanatos having disconnected as he did. It was more comfortable certainly, but really they were just going through the motions. By the time it was done, Mel already knew they would have to do it again purely from the expression on Hedone's face. But really it was all on Thanatos now, as she knew she couldn't bring anything to the table without him doing the same. [1/26/16, 11:26:14 PM] M: Hedone shook her head displeased. Something went off from the first time they tried it and the blonde was wondering what was wrong. "I'm going to dim the lights for the full effect. So try again, and I really want you guys to nail it. Eye contact so you guys aren't chopping up the parts." Hedone also quickly demonstrated the flaws within the routine as she fixed up some minor mistakes. "Ok we should be good, let's get rolling again."

Thanatos:  Damn it.  He knew long before they'd finished she was going to make them do it again and mild panic began settling in the pit of his stomach, the urge to flee once again bubbling up inside of him.  But he feared if he just kept running away every time he felt something he'd do more harm than good, not only to himself but others.  "Sorry.  That was my fault...I was thinking too hard.  I'll do better this time," he replied, steeling himself to do as he was told this time and let the emotions from the song fill him and direct him through the dance...and actually look at Melinoe.  Swallowing thickly, throat already constricting with emotion as the lights dimmed and the music started he met her eyes as he danced.  With each step more and more of what he usually tried to ignore slipped through the crack as emotions filled him and memories leaked out.  Though this made his performance far better as he was feeling each movement rather than forcing them out.  By the end of it enough memories of the past had been pushed to the surface by the dancing, the music, looking at and holding her so closely that he finished the last move looking into Melinoe's eyes with an apologetic look almost as if in delayed response to the saddened one she'd looked at him with before.

Melinoe:  Mel honestly wasn't expecting much from Thanatos this time around, even with his reassurances. He was too disconnected, to the point where it was entirely frustrating. But the moment the lights dimmed and Thanatos met her eyes, any doubts that had been in her mind disappeared. It was overwhelming really, and frankly it was a wonder they remembered to keep moving. Had she been more aware of anything other than the way she was currently feeling, Mel very likely would have shoved it all aside for the sake of a grudge. But when that apologetic look crossed his face, current grudges were completely pushed from her mind. It was an older grudge that plagued her now, one whose very nature wouldn't allow her to meet his eyes with anything less than a confused array of emotions. So caught up in it all, she ignored the strict guidelines of the choreography they had been given; her hand drifting to rest tenderly on his cheek. Hedone:  The blonde was attentively watching, rather intrigued far more than the last time. Their resolve seemed to have fixed or at least touched up. Hell, the little improv gesture Melinoe included worked for the dance number itself. She didn't want to interrupt the mood with her alarmingly loud voice so instead she decided to try something else, "if you guys can do this, I would love to see what would happen if you improv. Give it a go." Hedone was encouraging mainly out of her own curiosity. Thanatos:  Now that he had let himself get caught up in the emotions of it all, let himself feel something for once, and encouraged by Melinoe's hand on his cheek he hardly needed Hedone instructing him to simply dance with Melinoe of his own accord, doing what came naturally as the music played for him to do so.  He wanted to.  Anyone else watching wouldn't have believed the man dancing with Melinoe now was the same awkward man they knew...or thought they knew anyway.  His movements weren't fumbling or awkward at all, but were the culmination of all that he'd learned and felt through his many lifetimes, particularly those he'd been close with the woman he held close in his arms, moving effortlessly with her, letting the music and emotions guide him completely and paying little attention to anything else but Melinoe and what he was feeling just then.  When the music finally stopped, he was looking back at Melinoe slightly breathless, the same confused array of emotions he'd been met with after their last dance on his face now...it was overwhelming and were he not paralyzed with all that he was feeling as he looked back at her he would have run away from it all right then. Melinoe:  Mel allowed herself to get wrapped up in at all, too taken by the emotions flowing unspoken between them to attempt to put a stop to it. The small dark girl moved so much more freely now than she had at the start of this evening; almost haunting in her movements, enough to run a chill down the spine of any that watched the pair of them. It was as if they had been dance partners for years, anticipating every small movement as if it had been choreographed just as much as their earlier dance had been. By the time the music had come to a halt, Mel wasn't certain whether she wanted to run or never let go; and that was all the more distressing than any tension that had existed between them earlier. Eyes remained locked on his as he looked back at her, searching for some kind of answers to the questions that now plagued her. At this point the girl had forgotten that Hedone even still remained in the same room.

Hedone:  Hedone was impressed to say the very least and could see that something hidden seemed to flourish. She was smiling as she brought her hands up with a clap to get the pairs attention. "I think that's enough for now. You guys did really well and if you can practice the routine for a couple more days, the showcase will be a hit. Clearly I don't need to babysit," she said with a small laugh. "Class dismissed, you can keep the outfits until the dance is over. And oh, here's a token of my gratitude." She quickly slipped a card in each of their hands. On it was scrawled a free meal ticket to one of New Yorke finest restaurants. "Anyways I have a meeting to make so I'll leave you two here. Close the door on your way out. My assistant will lock it later." And with that hedone ended up packing her materials and walking out of the room to leave the two together. Thanatos:  Hedone's clap seemed to shake Thanatos out of his reverie like a switch, and he blinked, shaking his head slightly as he turned his head away from Melinoe to look at Hedone as she spoke, feeling regretful for the interruption...yet also relieved.  Mutely, he held out his hand to take the card she handed him before he slipped it into his pocket mechanically.  Looking back at Melinoe as Hedone made her retreat, he realized he still had one hand around the small of her back and with a look a mixture of apologetic, sad, awed and a hint of fearful, he let it fall away from her slowly, swallowing thickly as he stared back at her in stunned silence.  He was still paralyzed, not sure what he was feeling exactly nor sure if he wanted to know and slightly fearful at all of it.

Melinoe:  Mel practically jumped out of her skin the moment she heard Hedone clapping, but she couldn't even find it in her to comment as the woman practically rolled a way in a flurry. She was far too shaken, and even once Hedone was gone she found it difficult to look at Thanatos until his cool hand was removed from the small of her back. Eyes wide and teeth worrying at her lower lip, she looked up at the man; searching and uncertain what to say. When she finally did manage to find the words, her eyes pulled away once more; unable to watch whatever expression they might bring to his face. "You remembered didn't you." Remembered what he had so long tucked away, and what Mel had long given up on; allowing bitterness to take hold with the man one life after another, for whatever reason she could find. What she herself had blocked as well as she could to better hold up her self delusion that she hated everything about the man.

Thanatos:  For the most part Thanatos could handle his own emotions and recognize them. For the most part. It was understanding everyone else's that had always alluded him in some way over his lifetimes, taken to the extreme in this one by a series of circumstances. And even with things slipping through the cracks helping him make some sense of things, he didn't fully understand it all. But he knew he had upset her and for that he was sorry. "I didn't realize it bothered you," he replied in answer to her question, speaking of the way he let things from past lives stay in the past, trying to work out why it bothered her as much as it appeared to and looking away in frustrated embarrassment when he couldn't. Truthfully, he wanted to cry. Not necessarily because he felt that bad or sad or that they had even shared anything worth his tears but because the onslaught of emotions, his and hers combined and trying to make sense of them was that overwhelming and distressing to him. But he didn't. He could do that later if he still needed to. "I'm sorry," he replied, looking back at her earnestly wanting her to know that he meant it and wasn't just saying it because he felt like he was supposed to. He was sorry his actions had bothered her so much even if he still didn't see quite why. He really was clueless.

Melinoe:  Tears of frustration began to brim Mel's own eyes, but not for the same reasons as his own. All of these emotions rushing back to her as she allowed herself to recall why she held so much of a grudge against the man before her were just compounded with the fact that even as he remembered he didn't seem to understand. "Of course it bothered me. How could it not have bothered me?" Turning from him she dashed a few tears from her eyes with the back of her shaky hand. Then his apology fell upon her ears and caused her to turn back to face him, searching his eyes for just a moment before shaking her head. He didn't get it, and she had no desire to try to explain it to him. If it mattered so little to him that he couldn't empathize, then the apology held little meaning for the state of her heart. It had been so much more simple to just hate him mindlessly; but now it was too late to go back to that. "Don't be. Apparently none of it mattered." She moved to gather her things, wanting to leave before she broke down in front of him; not wanting to make a fool of herself like some schoolgirl that couldn't handle a bit of rejection.

Thanatos:  A broken, hopeless expression filled him at her reaction. It wasn't his fault he didn't understand...and tears began pricking at his own eyes. In this life he'd never been able to understand and even his memories of other lives didn't always help. But he had never known the depth of her feelings back then, not as clueless as now perhaps, but matters of the heart had still mostly alluded him. At least recognizing them had. Until that one time when things had gone so very wrong that very next life and everything has gone down hill from then as far as his awareness and empathy was concerned. This life worse than any before. But he did understand love...he'd felt it before and it wasn't hard for him to imagine how it would have felt to love someone or feel strongly for them and to have them look at you as if they didn't know you. And that's what he's done to her. And nothing he could say or do could erase that fact. Instinctively when she moved to leave, he reached out and grabbed her by the wrist, his palm feeling the accelerated race of her pulse as her emotions ran high. It was feeling that beat against his hand that seemed to break the dam he'd built around his emotions. "It mattered," he said staring at her wrist in his hand in awe. He remembered having been fascinated feeling her pulse before, never having thought such an obvious sign of life could feel so beautiful and without thinking about it, he brought her wrist against his cheek, eyes falling closed, a sigh leaving him as he felt the beat against his cheek. "I'm sorry....I didn't know."  Though this time he spoke of his own feelings towards her before. Only now was he able to understand what they had been.

Melinoe: Taken by surprise that he had actually bothered to stop her, Mel turned to face him; eyes wide and hesitation leaving her body tense. She didn't relax when he spoke or lifted her wrist to his cheek, far too overwhelmed by a confusing array of emotions. Pulse quickened all the more, and she took a step closer; if only to ease the strain on her arm without pulling it from his grasp. "I tried. ..To forgive you." Fingers curled to rest easily against his face. "But it's not in the nature of vengeance to forgive." She swallowed harshly against the swollen feeling in her throat. "It was easier to hate you and forget."

Thanatos:  Oh how he'd forgotten what it felt like. To feel the way he did when her fingers curled against his face. Not the contact itself, but that warmth that spread through every limb in his body, staring in his chest near his heart and radiating out to every part of him. Craving more of that feeling, his head turn into her touch bringing his lips to the point where he pulse thrummed rapidly like it was ready to burst. He didn't kiss her skin per se but let his lips linger against it before he let out a shuddered breath, a testament to how truly overwhelming his feelings and emotions were then, as he turned to look at her, eyes boring into hers. "Nor is it in the nature of death to live let alone anything else that might come with that." Then he gave a shrug and a shake of his head, moisture welling in his eyes. "It was easier to ignore everything, block out all the things reminding me that I'm alive. I didn't mean--" he said, but was unable to voice the words. He didn't mean to hurt her.

Melinoe:  Tears began to well in the girl's eyes once more, but this time she was only barely able to keep them from falling. How was she supposed to take words like that when they rang so true, yet somehow still stung with rejection? But not because of something to do with her as she had so long thought, rather because he rejected the very idea of what lay between them. Wrist turning in his grasp, Mel shifted her hand to cup his cheek rather than merely resting against it, her thumb brushing against his soft skin. "Yet here I am, always stuck on the brink of life and death. One foot in and one foot out. I can tell you this at least. Even the dead feel, Thanatos." It was plea of sorts, a request that she was so afraid would go unbidden. She would harbor no ill will toward him for it. Not now that she actually understood. She couldn't promise that it would always be this way; but for now it was all too much at once. Thanatos needed time and space to wrap his head and his heart around all that had returned to him, and Mel had to try to accept that.

Thanatos:  Thanatos stood there, emotions and everything laid out messily before him and all he wanted to do was gather them up and lock it all away again. Yet even with all the understanding rushing though him her words were difficult for him to comprehend. He wasn't dead. Hadn't been before. He was the very essence of death. He had been something that transcended all of it placed into a mortal world and life he would never truly belong to. Far from remind him that he wasn't mortal, his past lives only served as reminders that things were not how they once were for him, served as a reminder in one instance of the pain he had suffered when he'd let himself fall victim to being mortal and all that came with it. However, he was mortal and though he may still be different from the rest of them, mortals and gods alike, he did feel. It wasn't that he didn't have emotions didn't feel things like being happy or sad, disappointed or angry, frustration even. He felt all that like anyone else could but it was when he tried to recognize them or understand what made him feel a certain way that he failed. Connecting the cause and effect of his own emotions was difficult let alone those of others as he was so painfully aware of now, seeing how much his actions had affected her because of what she had felt for him only realizing all this time later what he had felt for her in return all that time ago. Was feeling for her now as she brushed her thumb against his cheek. But it was too much. It was too much all at once for the man who'd spent so much time trying to remain above all of it so he didn't get hurt again. And tears began to fall as he shook his head instinctively as if he could banish it all if he did so hard enough. "I'm--I don't--I can't. I'm not like all of you, I don't know how to---" after all this time he still didn't really know how to live, how to be alive. And until he looked at her then, seeing that sadness in her eyes that he'd caused, knowing he never wanted to see that or be the cause of it again, he had never had any reason he wanted to learn. If he could make that go away, see her happy and not so hurt, it might be worth it.

Melinoe:  A deep melancholy pervaded Melinoe's eyes as she looked into Thanatos'. She knew all too well how difficult it was to adjust to all of this, knowing that even now she hadn't done so completely. It was just more in her nature to accept the emotional side of things, necessary when empathizing with those mortals that called upon her powers or providing vengeance for those spirits under her care. Even so who better to understand death than her, princess of the underworld? That hardly stopped it from hurting, but she understood all the same. Accepting the truth of things Mel stepped forward to bid Thanatos goodbye, but refusing to use those words in hopes that he may one day understand as well. "I've missed you," she whispered softly before placing a full but short and gentle kiss upon his lips. Just as quickly she was out the door, as if she had never been there at all.