#hate spinnerbait

Happy Birthday, Sarah Dessen!

Sarah Dessen Merch

'Leo!' someone yelled. 'Bring us our food, now!' He turned, looking at the door. 'Come on. You can at least give me a pizza and some knots.' 'Sure,' I replied, turning to walk back to the hall. 'For five thousand bucks. And some fizzy water.'

'We had a deal. The band is playing this event.' 'If we pay them five grand, which is not happening,' I said. 'Five grand?' Eric said, incredulous. 'For Spinnerbait?' 'Hate Spinnerbait,' his friends recited. This time Ambrose joined them. 'Seriously?' I said to him. 'It's what you do,' he replied with a shrug.'

'Leo! Get that food in here. We're starving.' 'It's Theo,' the man in question snapped. Layla snorted. Then, turning back to us, he said, 'Do not address the band. Do not look at the band. Just--' 'Oh, don't worry,' Mac said. 'It's going to be more painful for us than for them. Your total's one forty-three seventy-two, before tip.' 'Cash preferred,' Layla added. Theo looked at me. 'Go ahead and cover this and we'll discuss the rest of the money once the band is eating.' 'Excuse me?' 'Wait, you're paying them to play?' Eric said. 'People actually do that?'

'Layla, I knew we should have turned down the order when it came it,' Mac said to the girl. 'Remember? It just felt evil.' I looked at him. 'Evil?' 'Spinnerbait--' Eric said from behind us. 'Hate Spinnerbait,' his friends said again. 'Stop saying that!' Theo yelped. '--encapsulates everything that is wrong with the local music scene today,' Eric continued. 'Terrible at instruments. Bad attitudes. Songs covered in the blandest, most white-washed way for an audience that doesn't even know what real music is, much less that they deserve to hear it. Their melodies are literally insulting to anyone with ears.' Everyone was quiet for a moment. Then Ambrose said, 'That about sums it up, actually.'

'Do not make eye contact with the band,' Theo continued. Mac, the guy with the pizzas, who was now beside me, exhaled loudly. 'Simply put down the food, set it out in an attractive preparation, and leave the room. Understood?' The girl with the knots looked at me. 'Is he serious with this?' I held up my hands. 'Don't ask me. I'm just trying to get a band that agreed to play a wedding to do that. Preferably five minutes ago.' 'Wait, they're not going on at all?' Ambrose said to me. 'They're not happy with the conditions,' I explained. 'But they're Spinnerbait,' he said. 'Hate Spinnerbait,' the girl, Mac, and Eric and his porkpie hat said automatically. 'Do not say that!' Theo hissed, looking at the door. 'They hate that!'