How the Hargreeves siblings would react to walking in on you
Hargreeves!reader
Summary:
Your romantic date with your significant other ends up in bed.
Your siblings sadly don't feel the need to knock before entering your room.
There's nothing more to say
Luther:
He´s a blushing and stuttering mess.
“Oh shit!”, he screams out, covering his eyes with his hand and turning around to give you your privacy.
“I´m so sorry, Y/N… I didn´t mean to… I just wanted to ask you… I´m sorry, I just…”
Instead of leaving, he remains on his spot, not knowing what to do or say – maybe because he completely forgot the question he wanted to ask you.
“Luther”, you finally interrupt his stuttering in a soft but firm tone, “I´ll talk to you later, okay?”
It takes him a few seconds but finally he understands the sign and leaves (not without bumping into the doorframe on his way out).
He´ll definitely never open your door again without knocking and waiting for you to shout “Come in!”
◇ ◇ ◇
Klaus & Ben:
Klaus is quite the opposite.
Instead of leaving or even turning away, he just stands there in the doorframe with an amused grin on his face, completely oblivious that you´re embarrassed and want him to leave.
“Oh who´s that?”, he asks while trying to get a glimpse of your lover.
Ben – although being a ghost and therefore being invisible to you – covers his eyes. “And that´s why I told you to knock.”
“Oh shut up! You´re such a know it all!”
“Well, it could have saved Y/N this embarrassing moment!”
“Klaus, leave!”, you shout, covering your body with your blanket, but Klaus still doesn´t move.
Rising his hands in a defensive gesture, he turns towards Ben who already stepped out of the room, his face burning bright red in embarrassment. “I´m sure Y/N isn´t embarrassed.” Tilting his head, Klaus turns to you again. “Or are you?”
“Klaus! Please leave!”
“Yeah, yeah, no need to be embarrassed, I know that you are sexually active. I just wanted to ask you if you could drive me to the waffles place? Once you´re finished of course.”
“Klaus, for heaven´s sake! LEAVE!” You grab your pillow and throw it at him, hitting him straight in the face.
“No need to be rude!”, he pouts, while turning around and finally leaving.
“If I were Y/N, I would have thrown my shoes”, Ben comments.
Walking down the corridor, Klaus exclaims (loud enough that not only you but the whole house heard it): “And if you need another condom, just say so. I´ve got a few left.”
Needless to say the whole family knew about your rendezvous after that.
◇ ◇ ◇
Allison:
Allison never knocks before entering your room. She just walks in, gets comfortable on your big armchair and starts gossiping.
"Hey, Y/N, guess what Klaus did this time…”
She jumps as she sees you and your significant other, clearly not expecting that you weren´t alone.
Quickly she hurries back out and pulls the door shut behind her.
For a few moments there´s nothing but silence and you slowly start to assume that she left, when you can hear a quiet giggle from outside.
Allison was still there, standing outside your door. “Oh wow, I didn´t expect it to happen again.”
You bite your lip. Yeah, thanks for the reminder, it´s not as if you were trying to forget about the incident a few years ago, when you were all still living here.
“Is that the person you told me about?”, Allison sounds curious.
Your significant other looks at you questioningly.
“I´ll talk to you later, Allison!” Your voice sounds a bit harsher than you meant but that´s what it needs for her to finally leave.
You were pretty sure that she would bombard you with questions during dinner.
◇ ◇ ◇
Victor:
He is beyond embarrassed.
As soon as he opens the door and gets a glimpse of you, he jumps out of the room again. “Oh my god, I´m so sorry, Y/N! I didn´t mean to interrupt you!”
Not even waiting for your reaction, he slams the door shut again and leans his back against it, trying to calm down again.
When seeing you later at dinner, he can barely look at you, his face blushing bright red every time your eyes meet.
You tell him repeatedly that it´s okay and that it was actually your own fault for not locking the door and– after apologizing again a dozen times – Victor starts acting more comfortable and finally normal towards you again.
But exactly like Luther, he never just walks in your room again without making sure, you allow him to.
◇ ◇ ◇
Five:
“Hey, Y/N” Without even bothering to use the door, he teleports straight into your room, making you jump and scream in shock.
Five tries really hard not to show his embarrassment, as realizes what just happened. He looks you straight in the eyes, while his face is slowly blushing a deeper and deeper shade of red.
“Y/N”, he clears his throat, pretending he didn´t see anything. “I expect you down in the kitchen in five - ”
He stops and glances at his watch, silently debating if whatever he wanted to talk to you about could wait another few minutes.
“in ten minutes. Family meeting. And I mean strictly family.”
His eyes dart towards your significant other, a sarcastic smile on his face. “You lover can wait in your room in the meantime.”
Before giving you even the chance to react, he teleports away again.
His face still bright red, he walks straight down to the kitchen and sits down on the kitchen table, trying not to think about what just happened.
◇ ◇ ◇
Diego:
The door flies open and Diego storms in. “Hey, Y/N, I wanted to give you…”
He stops mid-sentence and freezes in his spot as he sees you. “Oh, sorry!”
You´ve never seen him this embarrassed before, his cool attitude has completely fallen off.
He holds up your little notebook that he borrowed from you the other day. “I´ll just lay it here for you…”
Strictly averting his gaze, he walks over to your desk – not without accidentally bumping into your art table and causing all your stuff to crash down on the floor. “I´m so sorry!”
You can see it in his face how he thinks about whether or not he should pick it all up.
“Diego” You nod in the direction of the door, motioning for him to leave and finally he rushes out.
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“I just can’t believe that she was just here to stick around and trick me, Five! Who does that?” You ranted to him while laying dramatically on the couch while he paced back and forth, trying not to impale his temples with his fingers.
“The Commission does, y/n. How many times do I have to tell you that?!” He snapped at you and watched your angry expression drop to one of suppressed sorrow. And for a split second he felt bad for hurting his sibling even more. “Listen, y/n. Don’t take it too personally. None of us have really had meaningful relationships. It’s just not in the cards with our family. It sucks.”
“That makes me feel so much better.” You sarcastically replied and buried your face in your hands, then felt Five lift your legs and cast them aside to make himself some room on the couch.
“Just…give it time, y/n. If we stop this upcoming apocalypse, you’ll have plenty of it.”
A/N: my first Umbrella Academy fic and obviously it’s angsty because that’s what i’m best at
Being shot was completely different to what she’d been expecting.
She didn’t suddenly keel over onto the floor, a puddle of blood forming underneath her as she laid there.
Instead, she felt a sharp pain in her side, equivalent to that of a period cramp, and when she put her hand where it hurt, it came away stained red.
Her fingers shook as she stared at the blood, the sounds of the battle raging on around her fading away to a mere ringing noise.
The pain was beginning to get worse and she felt her knees begin to feel shaky and wobbly as she tried to keep standing.
Someone grabbed her and pulled her down behind a makeshift barricade made of old crates and an abandoned table.
Y/N laid against someone, her breathing ragged and shaky, hand pressed to her side as she tried to keep herself awake.
Luther had grabbed her and was now shielding her, Allison and Klaus from the endless rain of bullets falling around them. Y/N blinked sluggishly, her hand wrapping around Allison’s as a bullet flew too close to her head.
Not that it mattered.
The three siblings around her were blissfully unaware of the fact Y/N was bleeding into the snow beneath them, all of them being overwhelmed by the hurricane of bullets.
Y/N didn’t really notice Vanya as she floated out the barn and wiped out the entire commission with one blast of her power. The blood stain on her side was steadily growing larger and she was beginning to feel its effects.
At some point, she’d grabbed Klaus hand with her bloodied one and had yet to let go, even as the bullets stopped.
“Is it over?” Allison asked quietly, poking her head over the edge of the barricade.
Y/N let out a quiet shaky breath, her eyes staring at the puddle of blood seeping through the snow as the pain finally hit her.
Klaus hadn’t noticed the blood coating his hand, to caught up in their survival to notice.
“Luther,” she said softly, still staring at her blood.
Luther looked down at his sister. He followed her gaze, eyes widening as he saw the blood underneath her and the stain ever growing at her side.
“Shit, Y/N!” Luther exclaimed, pulling her back against him, moving her coat away from her side to reveal the expanse of red on her shirt.
Allison turned to look at them at Luther’s panicked shout, her own face morphing to match her brother’s terrified expression.
Y/N, now fully numb to almost everything around her, fell limply against her brother, hand slipping from Klaus’ as she lost all energy within her.
“Y/N, no, no,” Klaus muttered, pressing his hands against her side without a second thought.
Y/N sighed quietly, the sound almost lost in the panicked yells of her siblings. She was suddenly numb to everything. Even the cold.
Diego suddenly appeared in front of her, eyes wide with fear as he caught sight of the blood stain on the ground.
“Y/N, stay with us, come on, stay with us,” Diego said, grabbing her hand and gripping it tightly.
Klaus was the first one to realise there wasn’t going to be seven of them returning back to 2019. He’d seen this before, with Dave, and it broke his heart to see his sister dying the same way.
Klaus stroked her hair softly, tucking it behind her ear as he saw the glassy look in her eyes. Y/N tiredly turned her head and a slight smile formed on her face as she looked up at Klaus.
“It’s alright,” he said softly, forcing himself to smile at her. “It’s alright.”
Y/N’s gaze wandered slightly and Klaus had a feeling he knew who she was smiling at as the last breath inside her left her body.
Ben immediately engulfed his sister in a hug, holding onto her tightly.
“Hey, sis,” he said quietly, clinging to her.
Y/N smiled, resting her head against Ben’s shoulder. “Hey, Ben.”
Omg I loved your one shot for the umbrella academy and I was kinda stalking you and saw that you write for specific scenes too and I was wondering if you could write a Hargreeves!Reader in which they meet their dad again in Dallas. You know that crazy dysfunctional family scene? The reader is badass like five, lived an independent life from 1962 and until they saw her again. Maybe add where reader stands up to their dad bc of Diego. I was thinking her pwoer could be the ability to sense and change someones emotions!
Ooooh! Thank you so much for the request.
Personally I find that episode to be one of my favorites, so this has been a blast to write. If you want to read ahead (because I will post it on Tumblr some time tonight) you can check out my AO3 profile ☛ click here
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You’ll Be In My Heart (Hargreeves Siblings X Teen!Hargreeves!Reader)
Fandom: The Umbrella Academy
Pairing: Hargreeves Siblings X Teen!Sibling!Reader (familial only)
Word Count: 2,230
For: @ineedmorefanfics who gave me the amazing prompt: “The Hargreeves X Teen Sibling Reader. You passed away when you were 14 or something like that and when Klaus throws the bowling ball for Ben it goes through him but Y/N catches it and you're like "Klaus look! I did it!" And and Klaus is like "Yes you did. I'm so proud of you Y/N." And all the siblings can see you and they start crying and maybe when they go stop Vanya when Klaus conjures Ben he also conjures Y/N. You go and run up to Vanya and beg her to stop and you stop her and it's a fluff ending?”
Author's Note: Unless I missed anything, the reader's gender is never mentioned! I tried to keep it as gender-neutral as possible, although it is heavily implied that __y/n__ is closer to Vanya and Allison than the others 💕 This was SO much fun to write and I really hope you all enjoy it!
Disclaimer: I did use some dialogue from the show in this fic, and I do not claim to own it! It was just easier to use actual dialogue for some of it than to make it all up (:
You sighed as your brothers argued, flicking your gaze between them as they took turns speaking.
“I can't talk to the person I love, people still don't take me seriously. I want to be numb again.” Klaus said, exasperated.
You agreed that Klaus should stay sober, he had been doing so well up until now, but you also couldn't blame him. Your other siblings had always and would always continue to treat him like he was a child.
“You're a colossal wimp.” Ben said, deadpan, and you smacked him.
“Hey, knock it off.” You said sharply, and Klaus blew you a kiss.
“Thanks, __y/n__, I knew I could count on you.”
You shook your head quickly. “Oh no, I'm on Ben's side.” Klaus frowned at your words. “I just don't think it's fair to call you a wimp. You're not. You've been through so much, and I know it's hard, but you need to stay sober.”
Klaus sighed thoughtfully, and you thought you had gotten through to him before he resumed his frantic search.
“Hey,” Ben said, snapping his fingers to get Klaus’ attention. “Life isn't supposed to be easy. Life is hard. Bad things happen. Good people die.”
Klaus glanced between you and Ben before rolling his eyes. “Wow, playing the dead card again, huh? You need new material, bro.”
“He was talking about Dave.” You chimed in softly and watched as Klaus’ eyes softened.
“You know, we're tired of seeing you wallow in self-defeat.” Ben explained.
“Well, then avert your gaze.” Klaus said harshly.
“You're better than that.” Ben said, and you nodded in agreement. “And Dave? He knew it too.”
Klaus sighed. “Yeah, you're right. You're right. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.” Klaus’ voice was small, and his shoulders hunched in defeat.
“Thank God.” Ben said in relief.
“I'm so proud of you.” You said warmly, and you watched in confusion as Klaus’ face fell.
“Psych!” Klaus shouted, surprising you and Ben as he threw the pills in his mouth. He cackled in triumph.
Ben growled and swung his fist at Klaus instinctively. You gasped in shock as Ben's fist connected with Klaus’ cheek with a loud smack. The pills clattered to the floor.
“Owww,” Klaus whined, bringing his hand up to his face before he realized what exactly had just happened. You and Klaus looked at Ben in amazement, while he studied his fists. “You just Patrick Swayzeed me.” Klaus said in disbelief.
“How did you do that?” You asked, reaching out to Klaus’ bruising cheek and blinking tears away when you actually felt Klaus’ warm skin underneath your palm.
“Uh, I didn't. Klaus did. I think.” Ben murmured, and you all shared a look. This changed...everything. Klaus being able to communicate with the dead was one thing, but being able to make the dead tangible again?
Klaus was absolutely more powerful than any of you had ever thought.
-----
“Hey, you know guys, uh, maybe I could help.” Klaus suggested, after much encouragement from you and Ben.
“Now is not the time.” Luther said dismissively, and you narrowed your eyes at your brother.
“Was he always this big of an asshole?” You asked Ben, and Ben chuckled.
“Yes.”
“No, let him finish.” Diego disagreed. “He saved my life today.”
“Really?” Ben said, rolling his eyes, and Klaus glanced at him apologetically.
“Is that true?” Luther asked, and you and Ben both nodded insistently even though you knew your siblings couldn't see you.
“Yeah. Yeah, I did...take credit for it. In fact, the real hero was Ben.”
You felt your heart sinking as your siblings looked at Klaus with varying degrees of unamusement.
Klaus hurried to continue. “Today...listen. Today, he punched me in the face.” Klaus gestured to the bruise on his cheek. “And earlier at the house, he was the one who saved Diego's life, not me.”
“You are unbelievable, Klaus.” Luther said, and you felt your blood boiling.
“You want proof, is that it?” Klaus asked, motioning for Ben to stand up. You moved to stand behind him, just in case. “All right. I'll give you proof. All right, it's showtime, baby.” Klaus picked up a bowling ball, hefting it in his hands with a pleading look in his eye.
Ben crouched slightly and prepared to catch it. You watched as Klaus chucked the ball at Ben, frowning when it went through him.
You blinked in surprise as you felt it land in your hands. The gasps from your other siblings let you know that you were visible to them.
You looked down at the pink ball curiously before grinning from ear to ear. “Klaus, look! I did it!”
Klaus’ mouth was open in awe. “Yes you did.” He moved over to you, took the ball from your hands, deposited it back on a ball rack, and drew you into a tight hug. “I'm so proud of you, __y/n__.”
“I thought you said Ben punched you.” Luther said, his face pale as he took in the sight of you. You looked the same as you did on the day you died, down to the bullet wound on your stomach.
“He did.” Klaus agreed. “ __y/n__’s been around too.”
“How is this possible?” Diego asked as you made your way over to Allison.
“Dad said I had only begun scratching the surface of my powers. I think there's a lot that I haven't figured out how to do yet.”
You smiled at her and wiped the tears from her eyes, watching as her lips spelled out the shape of your name over and over again.
“Hi, Alli. I missed you so much.” You murmured before pulling her into a hug. She clung to you tightly, and you could feel her tears dripping onto your uniform.
After a few moments you pulled away so you could greet your other siblings. Ben pouted that you were getting all the attention, so Klaus piped up as you made your way over to Five.
“Ben really did save Diego, though.”
“Ben's here too?” Diego asked curiously.
“Ben is always here.” Klaus answered and pointed to the seat beside him. Diego, Luther, Allison, and Five waved at him. Ben beamed. “He's waving back.”
“At least I'm still older than someone.” You said, nudging Five with your shoulder and grinning at him.
Five scowled fondly. “I'm 58. I just look 13.”
“Oh, I know. I heard the story. But I look older so I don't care.” You wrapped your arms around him in a tight hug, which he begrudgingly returned, before walking over to Diego.
You were surprised when he pulled you into a hug, lifting your feet off the ground. “It's so good to see you again.”
You smiled as you felt tears pricking at your eyes. “It's good to see you too. I missed you all so much. It's so hard being able to see you and not talk to you.”
Diego set you down, and you strode over to Luther. He still looked shocked that you were visible to him.
“__y/n__, I mi-”
“I don't want to hear it until you listen to me.” Luther's mouth snapped shut at the authoritative tone in your voice. “This goes for all of you, but especially Luther. Stop doubting Klaus. Stop belittling him. Listen to him. And start respecting him. He's done more than enough to deserve it.”
Klaus let out an “Aw!” and blew a kiss in your direction.
“You're right.” Luther agreed. “Klaus, I'm sorry for doubting you.”
“Me too.” Five chimed in.
“Me three.” Diego said, nodding.
Allison raised her hand in agreement.
You grinned. “All right, now that that's out of the way…” You wrapped your arms around Luther's midsection. “I missed you too.”
You disappeared from his embrace suddenly, and your siblings looked around worriedly before they realized that Klaus had passed out in his chair.
“It must use a lot of energy.” Diego murmured, walking over to him and checking his pulse just to make sure. “We'll let him rest for a bit, then get him some nachos or something. Should bounce back pretty quick.”
“Did someone say nachos?” Klaus asked groggily, his head pounding.
Diego grinned and clapped him on the shoulder. “Coming right up.”
-----
You heard your siblings all gasp as Klaus conjured Ben, and Ben's tentacles emerged and began beating the shit out of the masked men.
Trusting that Ben had that covered, you prayed Vanya would be able to see you as you made your way down the center aisle. Judging by Diego's curious “__y/n__?” as you walked by him, you were currently visible.
You had always been closer to Vanya than you were the others, and you hoped that would help you in convincing her to stop.
You didn't want anything happening to her or your other siblings. Being dead, quite frankly, sucked, and they all deserved to live long, happy lives.
“Hi, V.” You said softly, and Vanya's eyes were filled with confusion as they met yours.
“__y/n__? How are you here?” Her fingers never stopped moving on her violin, but they did slow down.
“Klaus learned a new trick. Cool, right?”
“Yeah.” She agreed, and you could see the tears glistening in her eyes. You had missed your best friend more than anything, and you knew she felt the same way. Vanya seemed to come back to herself more as she glanced behind you. “Is that Ben?”
“It is indeed.” You confirmed, chuckling. You gently placed a hand on her arm. “V, you need to stop playing.”
Some of the steel returned to her gaze. “This was supposed to be my moment. I just wanted one good thing for myself. I wanted one thing I could be proud of.”
“Hey, hey, I know. You should be proud of yourself. You sounded amazing. You-” You paused, sensing Luther walking down the aisle behind you. “Sit down, now.” You said sharply, using your powers to get him to turn around and take a seat. “You've caused enough trouble already.”
You scowled as you saw Diego and Five moving towards you and Vanya next. “I'm handling this.” You insisted and made them both sit down next to Luther. Luckily, Klaus, Allison, and Ben knew that you had everything under control, and took a seat next to their siblings of their own accord.
“I hate having to mind control them.” You said, frowning, before turning back to Vanya. “I know that this must be scary and confusing for you, but if you stop playing and put your violin down, we can help you. We'll help you learn to understand and control your powers.”
“What if they can't be controlled?” Vanya asked, and she was sobbing openly now, tears streaming down her face. “What if I'm just a monster?”
You cupped both of her cheeks in your palms and forced her to look at you. “Vanya, you are the kindest one out of all of us. You always have been. You are my sister and my best friend, and I know without a doubt that you could never be a monster. There’s too much goodness in you for that to happen.”
Vanya's shoulders dropped suddenly as all the fight drained out of her, and her violin clattered to the floor. “I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.” She murmured, tucking her face into your shoulder like she used to do when you were younger and she was upset.
“Hey, it's gonna be okay.” You soothed, wrapping your arms around her and hugging her tightly. She trembled against you, and you felt your heart break. Vanya had never deserved any of this. All Vanya had ever wanted was to be included, and even after finding out she had powers, she had still been pushed away.
“Get over here,” You said, waving your siblings over. “And tell our sister that you love her and that we're gonna figure this out.”
“I, for the record, never wanted to lock you up.” Klaus said, always using humor to make others feel better, and wrapped his arms around you and Vanya. “And I love you so much.”
Vanya chuckled through her tears. “I know and I appreciate that. I love you too.”
“I didn't either!” Diego said as he and Allison joined the group hug. “I love you too, V. So does Alli.”
“I didn't even know that was going on, but I wouldn't have wanted to either.” Five said and stepped into the large embrace with Ben. “I love you.”
“I also love you!” Ben said cheerfully, and Vanya smiled.
“It is so good to see you, Ben. I love you.”
You all looked over at Luther, who was shifting uncomfortably. “I messed up, Vanya. I wasn't thinking straight and I should have tried to help you understand what was going on instead of locking you up. I'm sorry.”
Vanya gave him a soft smile. “I'll forgive you as long as you forgive me.”
Luther smiled and wrapped you all up in his big arms. “Deal. I love you.”
“I know.” Vanya said, positively flourishing with all the kindness she was receiving from her siblings. At last, Vanya felt accepted and included and loved.
You knew helping Vanya understand and control her powers wouldn't be easy, but with the family finally reunited and working together, you were sure you would figure it out.
warnings: knifes, blood, guns, death mentions, mental hospital
a/n:
prompt: anonymous: “Hi! Could you please write a “The Umbrella Academy” Diego Hargreeves x daughter reader headcanon? I always think Diego is such a overprotective softie dad ♥️♥️”
deigo really said “?????”
how dad
but also he’d just the most loving dad anyone could ever ask for
✨it’s because he was never loved by his dad✨
“hi cutie, i love you, i love you, i love youuuuu”
he locked away all his weapons so that you couldn’t hurt yourself on them
but he always missed a few and he’d turn around and see you holding throwing knives and just FREAK OUT
“no, no, no, you may not have those! knives are for big boys like me, not babies”
“give back”
“‘give back?’ are you nuts?”
diego has conversations with lil you as if you know what the fuck he means dhshshhshs
as you got older, you became more interested in his “career”
“no, i dont care if you have powers or not! you have a bedtime, that means no vigilantism, you hear me?”
“if i say ‘no’ can i be a vigilante?”
“you know what? how about you clean up the gym for al so he doesn’t evict us?”
you did not sign up for this
you really wanted to meet your aunts and uncles, but you weren’t exactly sure they knew about you
i mean, you knew you had a cousin but everyone knew about her because aunt allison was a goshdarn celebrity
“dad, i want to meet the family!”
“no you don’t”
end of discussion
despite having a bedtime, you still watched movies late at night with your dad
he really liked marvel movies
“come on, that would never happen!”
“you come from a family of superpowered kids, a robot mom, and a monkey, and you’re upset about...a guy that shoots arrows?”
“maybe i am, what’re you gonna do about it?”
you ask about umbrella academy stories a lot, you your dad usually makes it about him
“and then i punched that guy in the face! and then i stabbed him in the leg because he was a dick! bet you’re friend’s dads arent as cool as me”
*yawning bc you’ve heard this story a million times*
you go to public school
you do have your dad’s last name
which occasionally gets recognized
“woah! wasn’t your dad a superhero?”
“i have no idea what youre talking about” :)
practicing your knife throwing while diego is away, him coming home to find his knifes stuck through various targets
so proud but he had to make sure you didn’t hurt yourself
you actually had to learn how to patch him up because he did come home a bit battered and bruised several times
“im okay, y/n. no need to freak”
“dad, there is literally blood dripping on the floor will you just sit down and stay still for five goddamn minutes?”
“woah, who the fuck taught you to cuss?”
watching the news at home when your grandfather was reportedly dead
you were actually very upset because you wanted to meet him so bad
even if he was a dick
your dad came home silent and you knew he knew
“you okay?”
“oh, yeah, im better than okay!”
finally getting the chance to meet your family
“who are you?” -allison
“im, uh, y/n. diego is my dad”
*jaw dropping*
and you know what? that happened four more times (plus ben but you didn’t get to see that)
“and you are?” -luther
“who’s the...the little one?” -klaus
“well, what do you know? diego’s a dad” -five
“don’t tell me that’s...no way” -ben
“you’re diego’s? wow, i can’t believe he didn’t tell anyone” -vanya
“i...i know who all of you are” -you
diego bragging about how perfect you are while everyone simultaneously rolls their eyes
“well, y/n, maybe one day we’ll schedule a playdate for you and claire” -allison
“‘playdate?’ how old do you think i am?...but yes i wanna meet her”
“god, you’re so much like diego, it’s unsettling”
you had been secretly training at al’s gym during your dad’s late night activities
so when trouble came your way, you were able to handle yourself pretty well
“where the hell did you learn that?”
“al showed me a few moves!”
“that old man? you’re kidding”
you met your grandmother, grace, who was tasked with keeping you safe at all times
you actually loved her sm
but there was something a bit off about her
besided the fact she was a robot
klaus snuck you out so that you two could have BoNdInG tImE
it wasn’t all bad
ben was a lil choked up that he got to meet one of his niblings
“they’re perfect”
“they just stabbed someone, buddy”
“who are you talking to?”
FIVE EVEN SCHEMED WITH YOU
“okay, y/n, i need you to curve something when i throw it, got that? right at that security guard”
“what are you throwing?”
“you’ll know when you see it, make your uncle five proud”
“IS THAT A GUN”
<3 family
running into patch!!
“hey, kid, i just saw your dad. i thought i told you to handcuff him to the radiator when you were away?”
“yeah, well, he wouldve chewed his hand off so here we are”
that was the last time you saw her :/
well, your dad was now a wanted man
“what happened to your arm?”
“no”
you actually didn’t expect this family reunion to go south like this
wait—yes you did
vanya has powers????
“i thought vanya was the one without powers?”
“yeah. so did we.”
diego straight up did not want you anywhere near that
but you, again, were his child and also fuck authority you do what you want
the vibe is almost getting shot several times
by hazel, cha cha, and “commission” guys?
going 2 ur auntie’s concert 😌✨
“y/n, hide in the bathroom and stay there until i come get you”
“dad, i love you, but no”
“y/n, i love you too, but yes”
“no”
“yes”
“NO”
“YES”
you won
but in the end (or not so much) you time traveled to...1961?
without any of your family
“this is...this is not good”
understatement of the year(s)
what was a kid like you gonna do in dallas, texas in 1961
no seriously, what
it was rough, but you managed to survive on your own
and open a paper in 1963 to find a mugshot of your dad
“son of a—”
visiting dad! (two years later)
“y/n? oh my god, y/n! shit, i missed you so much! why do you look different? you’re bigger, oh god. how long have you been here?”
“2 years, dad. you?”
his hair was so LONG
“2 months”
“christ, that’s it?!”
“i have to stop jfk from being assassinated”
“what makes you think that’s a good idea???”
“its the right thing to do, wanna help?”
“shit, i guess. as long as i dont end up here”
“no promises, people in the 60’s are crazy”
diego: 👁👄👁
you: 👀
running into five on the street soon after
“uncle five?”
“no time to talk”
“okay, asshole? i’ve been here for 2 years and you dont care?”
“two years, huh? i spent 45 years in a post apocalyptic world as a 13 year old and beyond”
“i didn’t say it was a competition, dude. you kinda dropped us all at different times. at least, me and dad. he—”
“is trying to kill lee harvey oswald, i know. come with me”
finally running into your other aunts and uncles, who were so excited to see you
you ran into their arms and they picked you off the ground and you felt closer than ever after only knowing them for 10 days
dad broke out
lila too
“im your new mom!”
“you’re what?”
diego dragged you along with him almost everywhere
he had missed you so much, but he keeps forgetting you kinda grew up without him for a while longer
meeting grandpa :)
“a grandchild, huh? how unfortunate”
“bitch”
“what did you just call me?”
“a bitch.”
your dad and basically the entire table trying to hold back laughter
reggie was stunned
cold hearted just like him <3 he didn’t know if he was offended or proud
this is so confusing
diego just disappeared off the face of the earth
and assassins were on your case
“the goddamn swedes are back oh shittt im gonna die”
