#hack blaxton

It's in the movie poster featured in Merry Murdle

Mine specifically is the German version, some others have it too while others don't??

You will see according to the images that Brant is definitely NOT the title of Blaxton, so uhh

Yeah, first canon name I guess?

[Midnight Studios presents a film by Brant Blaxton; inspired by the novel of Dame Obsidian; Producer: Midnight the third, Regie: Alan Swiftsea]

Dame Obsidian has one too, although her description said "she's so often in court, they call her by her first name. For my own safety, I won't name it"

Logico: Look guys, I need help. Emma: Love help? Irratino: Financial help? Tiny Taupe: Emotional help? Dame Obsidian: Help moving a body? Everybody looks at Dame Obsidian Dame Obsidian: What?

The Squad's cooking skills Chef Aubergine: master chef Radical Crimson: knows a few recipes Emma: can follow instructions on a box Midnight III: made toast once Irratino: banned from the kitchen

Everyone is giving advice to Logico Astrologist Azure: It's okay to ask for help. Emma: You're not a burden. Dame Obsidian: Murder is okay. Irratino: Your feelings matter.

Logico: visiting the squad Hello, I just came to- Logico: sees Dame Obsidian shoving Hack Blaxton into the washing machine while Astrologist Azure records and Dean Glaucous watches Logico: retreating Something suddenly came up.

Astrologist Azure: What are y’all’s favorite things to wake up to? Tiny Taupe: Breakfast in bed! Emma: Emails from AO3! Radical Crimson: My favorite thing to wake up to is not waking up at all. Radical Crimson: The screams of my enemies are a close second though.

Midnight III: I'd make fun of your height but there isn't enough to make fun of.

Irratino: Detective! The man belonged to some kind of cult that worshipped a divine forest creature with antlers and that’s how he met his end. Logico: Dear God! Irratino: Yeah! Exactly!

Uncle Midnight: mixing different alcoholic beverages together Tiny Taupe: What are you making? Uncle Midnight: A mistake.

Emma: Apparently, it was Rude™ of me to pitch in my two cents on a conversation I happened to overhear, despite agreeing with them. Emma: On an unrelated note, I am no longer allowed in the ceiling vents.

Hack Blaxton: It’s the gift that keeps giving! Dean Glaucous: It’s the flower that keeps blooming! The Amazing Aureolin: It’s the boat that keeps sailing! Dame Obsidian: It’s the serial killer that keeps stabbing!

Irratino: Logico learned how to fold origami penguins from Dean Glaucous the other day. I told them, “I feel a little bad for the penguins, it’s hot here”, and the next day they put them in the fridge.

Logico: But when all hope seemed lost, I had an epiphany! Logico, earlier: I'm going to throw myself into the sea.

High Alchemist Raven: A sprite is anything not static. Emma: A sprite is a variable object, be it 2d or 3d. Midnight III: A sprite is a fucking soda. Midnight III: You god damn geekass bastards.

Dame Obsidian: Wow. I keep stepping on a lot of crunchy twigs. Irratino: Those are bones, Dame Obsidian. Dame Obsidian: looks straight up Not if I never look down.

Dame Obsidian: Radical Crimson, what do you have? Radical Crimson: A KNIFE! Dame Obsidian: Okay, have fu- Agent Ink: NO!

Uncle Midnight: Any idiot would know that. Irratino: I knew that! Uncle Midnight: See?

High Alchemist Raven: I want to be like a caterpillar. Dean Glaucous: Explain. High Alchemist Raven: Eat a lot, sleep for a while, wake up beautiful. Agent Ink: You know they have a lifespan of a week, right? High Alchemist Raven: High Alchemist Raven: That's just another highlight!

Logico drunkenly wanders around the house and Irratino is drunkenly giggling Emma, completely sober: sighs Well, looks like it's just me and you against the world, Midnight III. Midnight III, going to their room: Nope, just you. shuts door

Agent Ink: I didn’t know that air fryers are a real thing. Used to think that they were made up by the internet as a funny joke and that their purpose was to “fry air”. Tiny Taupe: WAIT, BUT IT FRIES THE AIR TO FRY THE FOOD?? Agent Ink: I DIDN’T KNOW IT WAS A KITCHEN APPLIANCE, MY FIRST ASSUMPTION WAS SOMETHING AKIN TO AN AIR CONDITIONER! Dame Obsidian: IT’S NOT LIKE AN AIR CONDITIONER???? Uncle Midnight: You guys clearly don’t own an air fryer.

Irratino: I have the sharpest memory here - name one time I forgot something! Emma: You left me, Midnight III, and Agent Ink in a Walmart parking lot at 2am a day ago. Irratino: I did that on purpose, try again.

Ok this isn't an incorrect quote but its a rare one I think

Congratulations! You've stumbled upon a secret message from me (the programmer of this generator): Remember to drink water. And also take your meds if you have those and are supposed to take them. Also, have a nice day if that's a possibility. I hope y'all are doing great, and remember: Happy pride month! Always respect each other's pronouns!

Well it's not pride month but it can be pride month whenever I want

Emma: There are some things beyond our understanding. We must accept them and learn from them. Because these moments of crisis are also potential moments of faith. A time, when we either come together or fall apart. Nature always has a way of balancing itself. The only question is, what part will we play? The Amazing Aureolin: Did you just make that up? Emma: No. I read it in a fortune cookie once. The Amazing Aureolin: Emma: A really long fortune cookie.

Chef Aubergine: Hey, Dean Glaucous you're smart, tell me what would happen if I chugged 3 gallons of chloroform. Dean Glaucous: Have you ever been to a mortuary? Chef Aubergine: Yea, my grandma lives there. Emma: That is the worst response to that question.

Irratino: Do crabs think people walk sideways? High Alchemist Raven: …Irratino, what the hell.

Hack Blaxton: Where's Logico, Chef Aubergine, and Uncle Midnight? Uncle Midnight: They're playing hide and seek. Hack Blaxton: Where? Uncle Midnight: I don't think you get how this game works.

Emma: spins around in chair ominously I’ve been expecting y- chair continues to spin shit tries to stop spinning shit tries to grab a table to stop spinning sHIT falls out of chair

Radical Crimson: I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.

The gang when they drop food on the floor Tiny Taupe: Aw man. Throws it away High Alchemist Raven: Five second rule! Chef Aubergine: Foolish germs, thinking they can stop me!? Eats it off the floor Emma: Sobs on the floor

Irratino: Hey, can you do me a favor? Uncle Midnight: Sorry, I have to go do literally anything other than this. Irratino: You don’t even have a legitimate reason? Uncle Midnight: Oh, no, I do. Irratino: Well, what is it? Uncle Midnight: You see, I simply don’t give a fuck.

Astrologist Azure: Everyone has a toxic trait. Except Agent Ink, they’re perfect. Agent Ink: Wrong! My toxic trait is how badly I want to domesticate a raccoon.

Astrologist Azure: Stop thinking whatever you're thinking. Chef Aubergine: Huh? Astrologist Azure: You always make that face when you're about to say something stupid just to piss me off. So cut it out- Astrologist Azure: Chef Aubergine: Chef Aubergine: Cereal qualifies as a soup. Astrologist Azure: I KNEW IT!!

The Amazing Aureolin: No, I don't want to talk about physics! I don't know anything about the laws of physics because they are hard and boring. I simply would like them to behave in a way that is most convenient to ME and MY LIFE! Is that really asking too much? Earl Grey: Yes, as a matter of fact, it is! The Amazing Aureolin: Well, guess what? Science is stupid bullshit!! Earl Grey: You take that back!!! The Amazing Aureolin: No. Magic is awesome. Science blows. The end.

The Amazing Aureolin: We might have gotten into a bar room brawl back in the city. Dame Obsidian: Well, that was entirely predictable. The Amazing Aureolin: One of them punched a gang member. Dame Obsidian: Radical Crimson? The Amazing Aureolin: Hack Blaxton, actually. Dame Obsidian: Oh, that was going to be my second guess.

Irratino: Logico kissed me! Agent Ink: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! Irratino: It was unbelievable! Agent Ink: Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! High Alchemist Raven: Okay, we wanna hear everything. Agent Ink, get the wine and unplug the phone. Irratino, does this end well or do we need tissues? Irratino: Oh, it ended very well. Agent Ink: Do not start without me! Do not start without me! High Alchemist Raven: Okay, alright, let’s hear about the kiss. Was it a soft brush against your lips or was it like a, you know, “I gotta have you now” kind of thing? Irratino: Well, at first it was really intense, you know? And then, oh God, and then we just sort of sunk into it. High Alchemist Raven: Ohh… So, okay, were they holding you? Or were their hands on your back? Irratino: First they started out on my waist and then they slid up and then they were in my hair. Agent Ink and High Alchemist Raven: Ohhh. meanwhile Logico eating pizza in their house: And, uh, and then I kissed them. Emma: Tongue? Logico: Yeah. Astrologist Azure: Cool.

Agent Ink: I sleep with a gun under my pillow. Midnight III: I sleep with a knife. Logico: Both of you are pathetic. Agent Ink: Oh yeah? What do you sleep with? Logico: Irratino.

Larping be like

Logico: Well, aren’t you all a rag-tag group of adventurers with unclear goals and good hearts! Oh, let me guess: you’re out to save the world! High Alchemist Raven: Well, actually, that sounds like a pretty fair assessment. Astrologist Azure: More or less, I guess… Tiny Taupe: That sounds awesome! Let’s do that! Chef Aubergine: I’m new here, but I am open to the concept. Irratino: I thought that’s what we were doing, guys, come on!

The Squad is at Home Depot Midnight III: Fell in the cacti display while wandering around the garden section Emma: Puking in the display toilets because they ate paint Astrologist Azure: Tokyo Drifting one of those flatbed carts down the aisles Chef Aubergine: Stealing paint chips for aesthetic purposes Agent Ink: Just wanted some goddamn lightbulbs and everyone ruined it High Alchemist Raven: In the car sleeping

Agent Ink: What do rainbows mean to you? Logico: Gay rights. The Amazing Aureolin: There's money. Dame Obsidian: The sign of God's promise to never destroy the whole Earth with a flood. Dean Glaucous: It is an optical phenomenon that separates sunlight into its continuous spectrum when the sun shines on raindrops.

Astrologist Azure: What do you guys do when you're stressed? Irratino: Try and calm myself down! Tiny Taupe: Sleep. Radical Crimson: Get myself into even more stress, so that the first reason for my stress gets cancelled out. Hack Blaxton: I don't.

Agent Ink: Poison is a magic transmutation potion that turns people into corpses. Chef Aubergine: This knife is actually a magic wand. High Alchemist Raven: Meet me in the Denny’s parking lot for a wizard duel. Astrologist Azure: cocks gun Magic missile. Dean Glaucous: What the fuck is wrong with you people.

Irratino: How would you like your pancakes? Logico: Plain. Radical Crimson: With sprinkles! Tiny Taupe: Chocolate chips. The Amazing Aureolin: Potatoes. Logico, Radical Crimson, and Tiny Taupe look at The Amazing Aureolin The Amazing Aureolin: What? They're good.

Earl Grey: Mice are having sex in my walls. Irratino: Tattletale! Midnight III: You're just being ungrateful. Chef Aubergine: It's their home too, you know. Agent Ink: So what? Don't slutshame them. Earl Grey: The mice are fucking AND now I'm getting heckled.

Dame Obsidian: What does “take out” mean? Dean Glaucous: Food. High Alchemist Raven: Dating. Midnight III: Murder. Astrologist Azure: It can be all three if you’re brave enough.

Brant Blaxton

~ 🪐