#gradshool

"You must be soo excited."

Well maybe now I am.

In a loaded rental car leaving Ottawa with the scant belongings that didn't make it back to Toronto with me the last two times I visited.

Those include a coffee table book of Ottawa given to me by my co-workers, Parliamentary shot glasses given to me by my friends, one load of fitness oriented laundry, 2 suit jackets that I never wore in Ottawa and half a bag of multi-coloured nacho chips made with real sea salt, amongst other things.

This morning my lady at the bank called to say that my loan documents were lost in the netherworld of an inter-branch transfer, I lost out on a sweet apartment in Brussels because I didn't know how to say 'deposit' in French and have slept on a comfortable but very futony futon for the past two weeks.

"You must be sooo excited."

I've never been one to get outlandishly excited before a major life change. I usually start to soak in excitement when I arrive and have some time to look around. The challenge of starting afresh excites me. The thought of living in Europe excites me. The hope of taking a step forward for my career excites me.

Otherwise I'm a bit nervous. About my money running out. Of that feeling of trepidation of spending a dollar when a replacement one isn't in the pipeline. Of writing essays. Of sitting in a graduate class full of international minds and opening my mouth. Of how it might feel to fall in love with Europe and then leave it in a year. Of ending up in the same mostly mediocre job when I'm done.

"You must be soooo excited."

So I'm probably more nervous than excited. And my excitement is furthered tempered by an intimidating new life-debt-ratio.

Four more weeks and this semester is OVER!

I'm hoping to pass every subject I'm enrolled and have a G.W.A better than what is required! Oh with God's grace, I know it's going to happen. :)