#goodilla

Opposite sides of a much too long table sat two raven-haired women. Next to the shorter-haired sat a male, and across from him, a third female.

Ginnifer had hired a man as her lawyer for their divorce proceedings, which was just another thing that annoyed Lana about her wife.

They had been in the conference room for a very long five minutes, but any time either lawyer attempted to begin, Ginny would make a perturbed sound or gesture that they were both too afraid to combat.

A great sigh of distress came from the fourth individual and she announced, “Could we please be excused for a moment?”

The male lawyer started to protest that he wasn’t sure it was the best idea for his client, but Ginnifer dismissed him with a stern, “Leave,” and just like that the table seemed to grow even longer.

“What--are you--doing?” Lana spoke in a rather low voice.

Ginny gave a shrug, as if nothing was out of the ordinary, and confirmed that notion with a simple, “Nothing.”

“Why aren’t you cooperating?”

“I’m here, aren’t I?” What more could Lana ask for? A cake to celebrate the occasion? The whole thing was terrible, and now she was being given a hard time for her emotions regarding the event.

Sighing deeply, Lana closed her eyes, pressing her hand down against the table. She tried to keep her cool, because they’d done enough snapping at one another in the past year. “You have to let the proceedings...proceed, and sign the papers, Ginnifer.”

Ginny slipped and cracked a smile at Lana’s silly wording, but she made sure to wipe it away before she opened her eyes. “I’m not the one who wants this, Lana. You can’t expect me to sign my life away, just like that.”

“It’s my life, too!” Lana snapped back, perhaps harder than ever. “Do you think I want to end my marriage? My god, I mean, you were my dream girl. I never thought it would be real. But now--now it feels more like a nightmare.”

Lana wished it was a nightmare. Then at least it wouldn’t be real.

“All couples fight,” Ginnifer said slowly. “And maybe it got worse for us, but we could go to therapy. We could work through it!”

Why were they having this conversation so late? Why hadn’t they started fixing things before they had broken completely?

“This isn’t just about us not getting along.” She wouldn’t have given up so easily. But now, she was completely and utterly defeated. “This is because you’re not in love with me.”

“That’s not true!” Ginny declared, all doe-eyed and bewildered. And those things that Lana had once adored about Ginnifer were now standing between them.

“It’s been that way for a while now.” Lana sighed and there’s nothing left of the vivacious woman in the individual standing there, and all Ginnifer wanted to do was somehow bring her back. “Maybe you felt differently when we got together. Or maybe you just expected something different, and it’s always been this way. But I was just too--”

Ginnifer cut off whatever ‘blinded-by-love’ excuse she was about to make (because she’d be damned if Lana tried to say they were never real) with a firm, “No--”

But Lana was just as adamant about her side, and spat back, “Yes--”

They were arguing like children, instead of adults who were about to lose everything. But then Ginny found that empowered woman inside of her and practically lunged across the table, grabbing Lana’s face and devouring her lips in a kiss both sloppy and passionate.

Sloppy because Ginny could not catch her balance; sloppy because Lana’s world was crumbling at her own hand, yet she was powerless to stop it.

Passionate because Ginnifer loved her, no matter what Lana wanted to say about her emotional availability or her sexuality. Passionate because Lana knew it would be the last time.

Lana ripped away, causing Ginny to fall back into her chair. But instead of sitting, Lana grabbed her bags and buckled her coat in a hurry.

“This doesn’t change anything, Ginnifer,” she said, in a voice so unlike her own. “I expect you here next week, ready to sign the papers without so much as a last glance at me.”

No, it was nothing like Lana--which made it all the more impossible for Ginnifer to discern if she was still in love or not.