#goddamit frederic

Hello and greetings once again, my lovely followers. Yes, I am still singing the same 7 goddam songs we still remember from our time back in civilization. And yes, we are still wandering around in the Austrian hillsides. However, Maria has yelled at me to be more positive for the children so I must fake optimism as I write this message to you all. Sorry for the absence in posts: it's just that most days I don't really care to do anything anymore and I just have Kurt and Brigitta drag me along behind them. Maria scolds me for it but the kids say they don't mind (because they know they'll get slapped if they speak out of turn like Frederic). But anyways, life is pretty much the same: starvation, hiking, daydreaming about playing catch with Kurt and using Gretel as our ball, the constant whining from liesel we've all come to ignore, and the endless "singing" and "dancing" from Frederic that has even led to Brigitta telling him to fuck off. I've never been so proud of one of my daughters.

Hello all, I thought I would catch you all up on the latest Von Trapp family shenanigans. 1. Maria and liesel have started to whisper and stare at me. I think they're talking about my mumbling to myself problem. Haters. 2. Kurt and Gretel have straight-out just gone missing. 3. Brigitta has taken in a vulture as a pet. It was Kurt and Gretel's pet but since they're no longer here... 4. Frederic keeps ranting and raving about global warming and how we're killing the environment and spouting sayings from a guy named Bernie Von Sandersson. Idk, but Frederic said he was a Jew so I told him to shut up about Mr. Sandersson in case a nazi spy is tracking us. And Frederic said, "how would a nazi be tracking us, dad? It's not like any of us are posting updates on the Internet." I told him, of course we're not, you dumbass. I'm just sending personalized messages to my followers on the tumblr so they know where we are and how we are doing. I'm not that dumb.