#gilbaert

he’s not supposed to be here.    he should turn around,   walk away and never look back.    he knows.    but a little voice told him to go anyway,   to make contact,   to connect.    after all,   she’s his first love.    memories of the past,   together with her,   it’s what kept him going.    he survived because of her.    and damn,   how much he longed for her.    how much he missed her.    days turning into weeks,   weeks turning into months,   and months turning into years.    not a single day has gone by without thinking of her.    the sweet nothing’s,   wild promises for the future,   meaningful touches,   he missed EVERYTHING about her.    and now he’s back.    just for her.    and desperately so.    knocks on wooden door,   loud and clear,   forest green eyes focused,   heart beating faster now.    negativity surrounds him,   insecurity attacking the mind like it had done never before.    what if she hates him?    or worse,   what if she’s in love with somebody else?    but then,   door opens,   moment passes by,   eyes falling down,   utter confusion overtaking him.    ❝    a kid?    ❞    words escapes him,   giving his head a little shake,   nervous chuckle rolling down his tongue.    ❝    c’mon kid,   tell me.   where’s your aunt?   you know,   brown long hair,   brown eyes,   very hot.   i’m looking for her.    ❞    still having no clue that this girl belongs to the woman he cares so much for.    but,   stupidly enough,   still no clue that this kid belongs to him,   too.    he’s too busy panicking,    the thought alone that she’d done something else entirely:   she found other love,   married,   completely settled down for another man.   this was all for nothing.

          ‘  you know, i should probably give you a heads up about this line of work. ’      his efforts  to get elena to back out are going to be relentless.  he is convinced that, if he tries hard enough, he will find something that will make her change her mind about joining him.  life on the road is not easy, after all.  in a way, he’s not lying  ;  he may exaggerate, though.     ‘  i mean, apart from the inevitable danger you’ll be putting yourself into, there’s also the skeevy motels, the shitty diner food, the room sharing, the cold showers, the no showers, et cetera ...  you know, all the stuff that comes with living on the road  ...  ’ 

“  please  !    please  ,  don’t  hurt  him.   i’ll  do  anything.   i’ll  be  yours.  i’ll  submit.   please ,   just    don’t    hurt  him.   please  —-  “

ft. @gilbaert

    𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐧𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐭 𝐫𝐡𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐦 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐨𝐭. His whole knee follows the movement, one hand fisted on his thigh. Thumbnail of the other hand is wedged between his front teeth, worrying the bleeding nail bed. ❝ You’re sure you’re okay? ‘Cause I don’t mind ditching math. I fuckin’ hate that class anyway. ❞

STEFAN AND CAROLINE. always.    in fact,   if we’re talking about canon,   i truly..   dislike stelena..   more than anything.    again,   we’re talking about canon,   right?    so..   what i saw was a man who had fallen madly in love with a woman who always   (   secretly but not so secretly anymore lol   )   had a connection with his brother,   too.    season 1 – 3 are the best seasons for me,   pretty much because of stelena.    they were in love,   it was real and i truly believed they would’ve done anything for each other.    they were willing to go far for their love.    but..   if i’m honest,   the connection elena had with damon,   it was so obvious that delena was going to happen at some point.    the beginning of the second season,   i was determined that it wasn’t going to happen.    elena promised stefan it was always going to be him – something she told damon,   too.    several times i believe.    it was so clear that she appreciated stefan,   that she loved him more than anything & anyone else,   and that she wanted to spend the rest of her life together with him,   no matter what.    yes,   the second season was a good one.    third season?   again this girl was willing to go far.    but lbr soooo much angst happened in s3,   it was understandable that she needed someone.    a shoulder to cry to.    and,   of course,   that was going to be damon.    they grew closer,   and i think that was just it for stelena.    stefan put her through so much pain,   basically pushed her right into his brother’s arms.    i get it,   she needed damon.    a friend.    someone who understood her pain,   the loss of stefan.    what i don’t get,   and what made me ‘hate’ stelena,   is the fourth season.   they broke up,   painfully so,   and two-three days later she ended up in damon’s bed.    it made me question everything stelena had.    the whole ‘that kind of love never dies’ and the ‘we’re soulmates’ made me just…… wanted to… puke bc YOU DON’T DO THAT TO SOMEONE you love.    especially not when he’s your soulmate.    so no yikes i will never go with stelena.    steroline owns me because there’s this beam of light who just…   wanted to help & comfort him.    at all times.    even when he was still together with elena,   caroline was always there.    season six is my fave bc is was such a caroline season and so great for steroline.    i just wanted stefan to move on as well,   to experience love,   real love.    and she gave that to him.    closure,   and so much more.    i’m sad though that we never got to see more of steroline,   season 7 & 8 was just… utter… shit but hey,   they got married and it’s a good endgame for me.    the only endgame i agree with tbH.    i don’t really hate stelena,   in fact ahh i live for season 1-3 stelena but…   when i remind myself of what happened in s4,   and what both she and damon did to stefan   (   after everything he did bc let me remind u he left town and turned it all off to protect his brother, and elena too   )   i just….   can’t…   say   stelena. 

lights pulsing to the beat of the music,   a layer of smoke filled the air,   reflecting the lights so they looked like a lighting in the clouds.    he brings the girl closer to his chest,   pure out of lust.    nothing more,   nothing less.    another sip taken from strong liquor,   eyes half closed,   a smile full of amusement overtaking all too perfect features.    nights like these matter to him,   considering it’s his only opportunity to escape hell,   or in other words:   his life.    the people,   the alcohol,   the drugs,   the good music,   it’s here.    every damn weekend,   over and over again.    a look is given from his plus one,   a simple sign to get to hell out of here and do something more..   intimate.    he gets up,   another sip from the vodka,   eyes scanning his surroundings once before he decides to leave.    but then,   a glimpse of familiar face,   eyes instantly shifting back to her.    painfully clear to him:   a drunk mess.    confusion and curiosity overtaking his features,   eyes trying to find his best friend but he’s nowhere to be found.    unconsciously so,   he completely forgot about his beautiful plus one,   eyes so fixated on the brunette,   big steps taken,   closing the distance.    ❝    you’re drunk.    ❞    a statement,   eyes locked,   drowning.    ❝    let’s get you out of here.   you need fresh air.    ❞    he takes his leather jacket off of him,   thrown around female shoulders.    strong arm wrapped around fragile body,   holding her close,   keeping her in balance.    ❝    let’s go,   gilbert.   you can trust me.    ❞     /     @gilbaert  !

you’re so incredible yourself.    know i’m always going to be here for you,   okay?    i appreciate you a lot.    thank you for having me,   for talking to me when i needed someone,   too.    cause that’s what we do bb,   we help each other <3.    i looooooooove you so much and i hope that 2019 will be a better year for you too.    i will be here for you,   always,   pinky promise.