well, shit, gang, this gender thing is hard...

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well, shit, gang, this gender thing is hard...

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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RANT
i do not feel like a girl whatsoever. there is nothing within me that feels like i am a girl. i feel like a clown who is trying to dress up as a girl. i feel like a girl in the sense that i am a wolf in sheep’s clothing. there is a spotlight on me and everyone can tell that i am doing femininity wrong. i wish i could be a feminine man. i wish more than anything. i wish that i could preform femininity badly and receive applause for it. i wish that i could be a man in my real life and still wear pretty dresses and heels and have long hair. i don’t think i was mean to be a girl. i cant transition because the body that my body would become wouldn’t look like what i want. i was dealt the wrong cards entirely. i am so far off from what i know i am truly meant to be, so what is even the point in trying? i will live out my days as a woman-clown, some sort of foreign thing that no one quite recognizes.
Part of why I’m so excited for this new Ghost In The Shell show is because the 1995 movie is such a big contributor to my personal view on gender or even gender theory. It intersects a lot with Legacy Russell’s Glitch Feminism as well as Gilbert Ryle’s definition of the “ghost in the machine” (despite the fact that the whole point of his coining of the phrase is that he doesn’t believe in it, lol).
There’s more I have to say about this but I should organize it in better notes. Just felt like word vomiting an initial…thesis? Statement of intent? Hypothesis? I don’t know. Out of my depth I guess, though what does it matter.
Anywho, I hope you all have a very gender day!!!
Gender is a pantomime & i have broken out of the invisible box

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Can’t convince me this album cover isn’t forcemasc
Yeah you’re right The Strokes, my reality as a cowboy does await me
I lowkey get confused if anyone calls me einar cus like
Why do remember that
Why do you care
Like wth
wait if i am kinda nb/ag and femenine leaning does that make me transfem