#gdcf

The first time Jiang Cheng saw Nie Mingjue, he was enamoured. The man's muscular frame and golden eyes sent 13 year old Jiang Cheng's heart beating faster than Wei Wuxian could speak.

Jiang Cheng was sure that if Nie Mingjue looked at him, even briefly, he would simply combust on the spot. Luckily, the man's attention was on Lan Xichen, so Jiang Cheng could keep his dignity and reputation intact for now.

He left and pushed the thoughts of Nie Mingjue to the back of his mind, saving the fantasies of being crushed by those arms for his dreams. He got good at keeping his thirst for the man under wraps, content with the fact that, as one of Nie Huaisang's best friends, he would be able to see him when he went to visit Qinghe.

He knew he would never see another man who was practically dripping sex appeal quite like Nie Mingjue in his life. He was okay with that. Nie Mingjue provided enough fantasies for a lifetime.

Then he saw Sect Leader Wen, and he thirsted.

The man's crimson eyes always burnt Jiang Chengs soul when they swept across him. His robes did little to hide his bulging biceps. The sheer power oozed from the very fabric of his being and Jiang Cheng wanted.

He knew it would never amount to anything but Lord, what he would do to be crushed in those arms. His fantasies shifted, featuring 2 absolutely chiseled men ruining him until he could hardly think.

And then the Sunshot Campaign happened. Jiang Cheng never regretted killing the Wens, nor did he regret Wen Ruohan's death. But he regretted depriving the world of Wen Ruohan's scorching hot face and body. Priorities am i right?

So now he was down to 1 eye candy, but that was okay. Chifeng-zun provided enough for his fantasies even if Wen Ruohan made continued appearances.

And then Chifeng-zun was gone. And now there was no more eye candy. Sure, Zewu-jun looked handsome, and Jiang Cheng supposed that Jin Guangyao looked fine. Lan Wangji, laothe as he was to admit it, looked better than he acted, but none of them inspired Jiang Chengs fantasies.

Time went on, Jiang Cheng recieved numerous courtship letters and he was flirted with. He couldn't deny that there were some handsome people asking to marry him, but he could never find himself interested.

Jiang Cheng grew up with Nie Mingjue and Wen Ruohan. He was practically immune to hot people by now. The cultivation world spread more rumours as countless honey traps failed and Sect Leader Jiang remained single.

Then that Lan Jingyi kid apprached him. And he knew the look in that boys eyes. He could practically feel the want emanating from the boy, the same way he was sure it did from himself years ago. He realised the truth.

He gets dragged into a conversation with Lan Jingyi and Ouyang Zizhen (Jin Ling occasionally joining in, while Lan Sizhui pretends like he's not listening but totally is) about which cultivator fucks the best. It's a tie between Hanguan-Jun and Zewu-jun (because lets be honest: the Lans have monster dongs).

And Jiang Cheng, who was never supposed to overhear: sweet sweet Jiang Cheng, who has never even held hands with anybody and found even passionate gazes shared between lovers to be shameful; Jiang Cheng who couldn't charm a person if his life depended on it; this Jiang Cheng walks by, hears the conversation, and says with no hesitation:

"Neither of them, actually. Zewu-jun goes a little too fast, and Lan Wangji doesn't know how to tie the ropes properly. But Nie Mingjue does this thing with his tongue that you'd never have thought was possible."

And he simply continues on his way as if he didn't just completely shatter all of their world views by revealing that he, in fact, does fuck, regardless of what they previously thought.

Wei Wuxian drags him back in and demands to know:

a) why he knows how Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji fuck

b) why he knows what Nie Mingjue fucks like

c) why he knows about BDSM

and upon being given answers,

d) who he has fucked

And Jiang Cheng, bless his shameless self, simply replies, "Who haven't I fucked?" and goes back on his merry way, leaving the other 5 scrambling to figure out exactly how many people this man had fucked.

Wei Wuxian: