#gaenseliesel

(Gänseliesel, Göttingen, Germany)

Gänseliesel

- Avrina Joslin

i walked to you that night or morning, to talk about him. how easy it must be now for him to sleep. as easy as fright is to me. as easy as a earworm’s crawl. it’s in the way you see it i told you.

goose girl, are you eleven? or more. have many before me sat as i do, at you, asking. have you been kissed more, your breasts touched more, your geese petted, your basket’s flowers stolen from. goose girl, are you a hundred years old? are you the second daughter, a replica or a copy. will you be like me, when i grow up.

i meet my mother here every day. sitting, the one time she did, cross-legged at you, looking at me, her daughter, her daughters, her husband as if it was enough. there was the sun, the pigeons, us. and it was all enough. to see her every day, would that be enough?

goose girl, are you woman? will they steal you one day like they did me too. when your mother comes asking what should I say. are your lips dry now. what did you tell mine when she asked you.

i waited at you for a man one night. i waited at you for a woman one night. i kissed them both and touched twice to know. i kissed them both but not at you. i kissed them both but not you. i waited at you for you just as i waited at you, for me too.  

my niece’s legs don’t reach your water, you have no flowers the day you meet her. she’s woken from her nap to chase your pigeons and clear skies to fall i pick up? why don’t they live in the same town as you and me or just an hour away. did they make your mother just as they made mine too or hers. dark, broad, vulgar.  

where are the flowers you had last night. did they drink too much at you. did they kiss you, again. will you change again tomorrow. did no one cut your hair. did you put your hand through it when it was there. when it becomes cold what do you do. the birds that sit on you. do you love them too.

they’ve gathered around you their markets and lights. they’ve drained your water, spilled some beer. i have wurst half a metre long and hot wine. i drink to you, sitting in your dry fountain, feeding your spirit as you do mine. your skin as dark as mine, as clean as mine’s always been.

if i ask you if it’s wrong to cheat, will you tell me you do it all week. if i ask you if you want to leave, will you also know it’s with me. will you know i’ll take you to the time i was eleven or seven where you’ll sit on the floor and i’ll undress and unbind to look underneath and you’ll say it’s all well and all healed. the day we become girls we’ll take out your flowers and play he owes me, he owes me not, he awes me…