#gabaliens

For a moment, I wanted to tell the loaf it shouldn't be able to talk. Again. But... but well... I... I pulled myself together, " 's not like I wanted to in the first place" Okay, I didn't pull myself that much together, it somewhat slipped out, this sentence. "You... do not travel of your own volition?," it frowned, "That is an offence in most galaxies" "Really. Really now. Kidnapping is an offence. Yeah. Sure. And slavery isn't. That's just GREAT!," I snapped at it. There was another confused look. Then a deeper frown. "You... really didn't travel through space much, yet, did you?," there was a tone of disbelief in this purry voice, "You got reaaaally lucky to have landed her-" "LUCKY?!," I yelled. It shrunk back, "Sure I am *lucky* to have landed here as a slave! SO lucky! It was always my DREAM to be someone's property!" He looked properly concerned, at least. Something the stupid first alien had failed to do in any form or way. At least something. A loaf of a cat was more understanding than a fully grown kind-of-human! Haven't we just hit rock bottom! "That... seems almost impossible. What happened?," it sounded concerned, at least, but that just meant he didn't know how bloody cruel these people here were. "Well, the first thing they did was torture me. For ages. I woke up and barely stayed conscious before I just... fell back to black. Then they told me they bought me as a slave. And intended to keep me. And that it was NORMAL to be a slave! And then he showed me this freakish outside world. Have you seen how it looks out there?! That's not a planet, that's just MADNESS!" And the cat looked at me and nodded and listened. "That... sounds terrible," again, it at least acknowledged that much, because seriously, what the hell! "And then he kept me imprisoned in this room! The only other option going to the MADNESS outside and that's just insane! All of this is just ridiculously insane!," it seemed like all this needed to get out. "... they took you from your home planet, didn't they?," it looked SORRY for me now. The bastard-cat! "What is it to YOU! So YOU'RE a proper space-cat then, huh?!," and it started to... to preen. A preening, purple cat. "Well, I... am not a cat. I believe they have a resemblance to my race, but I am a Lamassu," it still was kind a of a purring sound, "and yes, we are space farers since six millenia" "I'm sure your slave-count couldn't have been very low, then, either," apparently, I was irritable today. "We... don't have slaves. Never had, really. This... planet actually does not... either. It's not a thing they do" "That didn't feel like it in the weeks of torture!" "I... err... I'm almost sure there was a reason for it... they... this is a planet for healers. If it wasn't, I wouldn't even be here... this... really, it's all rather strange," it seemed unsettled. "Really now?! Because it wasn't pleasant, that much I can tell you" "I... were you sick? Did they treat you wrong? I mean... they don't even know your race, I really don't, so... maybe something went wrong?," and here it went again, defending them. He stood up and walked in the direction of the bed. Only then I realised I actually stood. Apparently, agitation was worse than fear. Much worse. "Hmph!," I sneered, crossing my arms. The cat was still huge, but apparently an apologist for this awful planet. "I'm sure Raphael meant no harm," the name tickled in my head. It was weird. "Apparently, he has fun causing people pain. As much pain as possible," because t was TRUE, "AND he looked into my HEAD! He can read my THOUGHTS! He looked into my head and tried to keep it  and store it and how creepy is THAT?!" It looked at me with disbelieving eyes: "But... how d you think how communication should work then? It needs to be done or... we wouldn't understand each other..." He made a confused face. GOOD LORD!

For all intents and purposes, this was a cat. It even *loafed*. And started purring. Except for the purple, it really was a norm- "So you've calmed d-" "NOPE!," I yelled and went further down again, "NopenopenopeNOPEnopenopenopenope nope nope NOPE!" For a second, I actually leaned my head against the bed, not seeing the apex predator for a time longer than I was comfortable with it. Which made me look at it again, then. Not a good thing, not a good thing at all. I wanted to cower behind the bed, but then I wouldn't see, but I really didn't want to see either and... and... This went on for an embarrassing amount of time. "You... talk?," I said at one point. "... mh... yes?" "NOPE!" I was definitely not okay with this. So absolutely not. What I ended up with was the little ball of fluff looking at me in worry. At least after several hours. At first it really liked the attention, but then it made weeping sounds. And I had to look away from the patient, purring, pastry-formed, purple panther. This was the moment I was even more weirded out by my own brain. I think that happens when you are under constant stress. You start alliterating. ... ... another word I didn't recall using frequently. Space was so STRANGE. This time, I recovered in maybe half an hour from talking.cat-induced shock-and-panic. It took four more tries. But at the last one, it only took five minutes. And then it said: "You know... the Lamasi are known to be most cuddly" And my constant, now overstrained nerve for panic did one last attempt to set me off into noping out. And it didn't work. Because: "You're a GIANT predator. You could eat me for breakfast and have room for a ten o clock snack! And dessert! You bloody loaf!" It crunched up his nose. It looked like a silly, purple rabbit. And I laughed. It was mostly stress. And its ears went down again. But it was still sitting there. Patient as can be. And didn't move an inch. Just continued the purrs. I was not over it. Cats didn't talk. But it might - just might - not be a cat. Maybe. And it was... fine. On probation. For like... a few minutes. Or something. "Why... am I... a loaf?" I never heard someone be that insulted and offended by a single word. And maybe I was laughing in earnest, then. For a moment. The stress was getting to me...

I screamed.

But just as well. So races died. I started to look a little bit into it - a battle that caught my interest, because it looked like Michael Bay directed it - when I realised that I had found the space equivalent of wikipedia hell. The absurdity made me shake my head. I found out the race living here only ended wars. When I was on the brink of deciding if this was a good or a bad thing, the door opened. A BIG, HAIRY head looked in. IT... looked a lot like a cat. It blinked it's eyes at me. Slowly. And came in. It was bigger than a tiger. FUCK.

On the way down, it woke up and started to wriggle it's tiny, tiny legs. I felt it against my fingers. It made slightly distressed noises, too. I still sat it down. And it looked up at me and panted, with it's tiny tongue out. I looked back down at it. It looked happier, when our eyes met. And, with a careful, unsteady motion, it got on it's hind-legs (stubs) and wriggles it's front legs (stubs) at me. I still did not know what to do with it, though. When I reached down to pet it, there was instant happiness. My halfhearted pets already did that. Mh. After a few seconds of pets, I retracted my hand again. Immediately, it looked sad. This time, I didn't give in. So it got back and all four... and then trotted off. Perfectly fine. So it just went and annoyed the first being it found. It will be fi- "YIPP!", the tiny thing exclaimed. And panted some more, looking at me. ... it stood next to the nightstand. When I looked, it padded it's tiny paws on the side of it, making pleading noises. And there were... leaves up there. The bloody leaves the alien had brought me. The little thing started to scuttle back and forth between me and the table. Back and forth. Back and forth, one 'yip' at a time. So pulled myself up and made my way to the edge of my bed... reaching over and taking the veiny things between my fingers. With a frown, I leaned down: "... bon appetit?" It came hopping like a bunny, happy and excited. And then put it's mouth into the leaf. I didn't know if it actually had teeth to rip it to shreds, but it certainly sat there and made chewing motions at the leaf. All the while looking happily at me, thankful. What a simple creature. It took ages to consume this single leaf. But then it wanted back up. And did not give up. At least not before I did. The sound of little, desperate feet on one of the bedposts was not nice. So I took it and put it back up, where it draped itself over my lap again. Not exactly very imaginative, but... well... it's that's what the tiny thing wanted... I sat there and pet the purring thing. Admittedly, it was somewhat nice. Reassuring, cause it was a living, breathing being, which was actually... kind of normal. It was soft, too. A plus. ... still not convinced, though. When the alien came back in, he looked, saw me with the tiny thing and looked pleasantly surprised: "You've bonded already!" To which I raised a brow: "... you... do know that no one likes to be referred to as a 'specimen', right? I'm a person!" "Uh... opinions vary and... you chose to be a slave, so y-" "I!", I interrupted him, "I did not CHOOSE to do anything like that. I was coerced. Forced. The other option would have been death. WORSE than death. Who the hell would choose to be a slave?! This is ridiculous!", because that was the second time he said that. Choosing to be a slave. Don't make me laugh. At which he blinked at me. And the little thing nudged it's weirdly wet nose against me. I shoved it away. Gently, but determined. "Oh. Ah. There are some races that like to subject themselves to slavery, declared another way of life would be unnatural... it happens. And that should be the kind that is actually purchasable. Trade of unwilling people is...", he rubbed his head, "... I suppose I will have to look into this for a bit. So... ah... you are a person. Yes. You did bond, though. It sat on your lap, your... personal space" I shoved it away a little more. He would... 'look into it'. Well *great*. "... it is a helpless, living being, no one would simply let it die. It doesn't deserve that", I shook my head, "... I don't really know what to do with it" He looked at me like I explained nuclear fusion to him. Nuclear fusion was probably easy for him, though. Then he tilted his head: "... bond with it? It provides warmth and physical sensation, also a sense of companionship?" I looked at the thing, then said: ".... it's a noisy ball with hair" "... oh", he looked disappointed. I shook my head and sighed: "... what does it eat? It desperately wanted the leaves on the nightstand" He looked over and grimaced a little: "You gave it powerbars? Oh... well... it seems fine" After scratching the back of his head, he continued: "... you can replicate some food!" "... I have nothing to replicate", I grumbled "Oh! Nono, it's got models that you can replicate, you simply have to choose" "What, like Star Trek?" "... uh... what is 'Star Trek'?", he said it very carefully. "... nevermind, just explain to me how the 'replicator* works. And so... I got a course in Replicator and computer... for further use. Well it would be slightly less boring.

It was possibly the least threatening thing I'd ever seen in my life. And it was happy to see me. When it reached the bed it stopped, looked up - just to much fur - and yipped once. And then ran in circles, yipping constantly. Again, it was not very big, and not very fast, but full of energy and movement. There was this terrible, nagging suspicion that this was a bugged animal, something to... to watch me and see me 'relaxed' or in my 'natural state' or some bullshit, the 'your species sure is great'-speech sure did that to someone. But the tiny thing just hopped... and yipped... and the yips just started to get less. And a little tired. And the more I looked at it, I just *knew* it didn't have a bug on it. Nothing metallic. No plastic. It was simply made of fur and skin and bones and... possibly adorable. The longer I looked at it, the more certain I was that adorable was actually a component. Because it had gotten too tired, ploffed on the floor for about three seconds, then looked up and had started up the yipping rounds again. After the fifth round, I  reached down. It did not fit neatly into one hand, I did need to use two, holding it properly, safely on it's short way up. It made questioning noises all the way. And then it was up. And snuffled. All around. And then it actually noticed me and made the most high-pitched yip yet. Then it hopped over on my lap. And promptly slept in, flomped to the side. Fur squished, little fur-chest raising and falling. I didn't know what to do with it. But it DID make a purring sound when I pet it lightly. It continued the sound when I continued moving my hand. ... I really did not know what to do with it. But at least I didn't harbor much ill will against it.

He nodded. Once. And continued to look at me. Apparently, he needed clarification: "That's NOT normal, these things are HEAVY!" After he blinked his eyes a few times, he seemed to have gotten it: "Ah. You... you assume you have a gravitational pull on you!", he smiled. Like talking to a child. "That is actually not the case. The nanites in your bloodstream also have a balancing function, it simulates the gravitational pull of... 9.81 meters per square second. So your muscles and bones do not degenerate. It is a very delicate balance. Important for all kinds of species across the universe. Death can be the result of wrongly adjusted gravitational forces", he nodded seriously. "And so HOUSES FLOAT?!", because that was the issue here. Houses aren't supposed to float, bloody hell! "Well, the houses have been equipped with solar energy generators, so it can effortlessly stay on that level, the proximity to this system's sun really helps", he shuffled his feet a little: "... this planet was a good find" I stared at him. He apparently believed in the righteousness of flying houses. I, decidedly, did not. They were crimes. Against nature. Just like everything else out there. Holes in the floor. No roads. No walkways. Nothing. "Next thing you tell me *I* can fly too!", I sounded angry. Actually angry. His open, slightly concerned expression didn't make me feel much better. When he lifted his feet in the air, lifting his robe against his feet, floating, I punched his shoulder: "Come ON!" He didn't float away, either. "This is stupidly ridiculous!" A head tilt later, his face fell: "I am sorry... I did not know it would be such a cultural shock, I almost exclusively deal with space faring races..." "Bullshit! It's not a cultural shock, this is a crime against NATURE!" I felt like I was repeating myself. He probably did, too. He returned to the floor. Like a NORMAL bloody person. And stared at me, long and hard. And I stared back, furious and shaken and I hated everything about this. Absolutely everything. But especially him. Just when I wanted to turn away and stalk off, his eyes widened and he stood back up, disbelieving: "... you're a packbonder" "I'm a WHAT?!", it took about two more seconds until my - WITHOUT MY WILL UPGRADED - brain supplied to me that this meant I bonded with other beings of my or other species and thrived only in company. "OF COURSE I am, you nitwit! NO one can live alone!" He looked at me with PITY then. *PITY* Somehow, this was all too much. Really, way too much. I flung myself on the bed and curled into a maybe even artificial pillow. Wouldn't want to know, really. At least it felt real and fluffy. And smelled of washed things. And that was fine, at least. "... that... is not quite true, actually. A lot of species are solitary, now. Mine is one of them... in almost all cases. It is a very old, recessive gene. Packbonding... is outgrown, at a stage of post-scarcity. It is not necessary anymore. Company. Since one can live on their own. It is not necessary for survival, so the bonding... gets lost", he rubbed his face: "Lord, of course, you were on the nuclear stage and blew yourself up. Of COURSE you are a packbonder. It explains why yo talk so much. And care. And are actually offended by things I say. It's not custom, it's your instinct, it's what you do" I hadn't even said much. I had stayed silent most of the time. "... no wonder you didn't want your thoughts known. It wasn't greed, it was worry and shame and all those... feelings", he shook his head again. "I am terribly sorry, I should have recognised you miss your... I suppose pack is the wrong word. Your closer circle? The ones you bonded with one way or the other", he sounded terribly sorry, "... and you could be mistaken for one since you miss them terribly. That's why your serotonin and dopamine levels are so low" He put a blanket over me: "... do you know how to find one of yours?" I just turned away. I've had enough. After a while... he went away, too. Good.

... I didn't know what to say. Everything was wrong with that picture. Absolutely everything. Starting from the pitch-black sky. Except for the GIANT SUN looming directly above us. It was a hundred times as big as on earth. One could see the explosions. The solar flares. One could see them with the naked eye! Then there were... buildings. If you wanted to call them that. There were blocks or orbs in different colours. Either flat - probably sunken into the ground - or floating. The only halfway normal thing was the one I just came out of. And that seemed just as bizarre. Like the fact that there was a hole in the ground. Going down. Just down. Things seemingly growing out of the walls, making something resembling ways, but not actually. But it also went upwards. There were strange forms, intertwined, threads of metal forming... things. Whyever. There was a door somewhere. And there was vehicles. They float or drive or hover or just... just be. With people inside them. Their movements did not actually follow any rhyme or reason. There was no road, or even orderly rows or anything. There was efficient movement. And houses - or whatever you might call the... maybe-buildings - went out of the way. Everything looked like things I ad never seen before. Certainly not like they fit together. And there was no noise. Nothing. I also wasn't burnt by the sun. And I was glowing. ... so was everyone else. I walked backwards, back inside. The door closed. What... what the HELL.