#funnydialogue

A: "It’s called being independent. B: "Going around asking people for money to buy a cheeseburger with extra pickles is not classified as being independent.”

A: “How long have you been standing there?” B: “More than you’d like.” 

A: “So… Ever had a boyfriend?” B: “We are literally in the middle of a life or death situation and you’re asking me if I’ve ever been in a relationship?” A: “Yeah?”

A: “Do you even know how to drive this thing?” B: “Normally, I’d lie and say yes, but considering the fact that I almost flew us into a building and nearly ran over a dog, I’m going to assume you already know the answer to that.”

A: “Can we just go home and take a shower? That’s not so scary?” B: “Depends what you mean by we.”

A: “Can you not be a dick for one second?” B: “Sweetie, one does not simply just stop being a dick. It takes a lot of time and energy and practise. And unfortunately for you, I am quite a lazy person.”

A: “You are absolutely insane.” B: “And you absolutely love it.”

A: "Excuse me, sir, I do have a sense of humour. For example, I’d laugh hysterically if you suddenly got hit by a bus.”