love.Ā /Ā accepting.Ā /Ā @fstclench
She waves, head above her head, calling his name with open delight.Ā Long legs take her quickly towards him as he stops in his steps, turning to look at her.Ā His smile is affectionate and soft, and she reaches him and grins.
He grasps her shoulders, still smiling, and pushes her to the ground.Ā Her eyes go wide, hands pressing at his chest on instinct, terror welling bright the way it always does.Ā Ā āGet ā get off of me āā stop it!!āĀ He doesnāt.Ā The smile is still there.Ā One hand holds her down ā heās too strong, she canāt force him off of her ā while the other presses hard against her chest, on the scar that Xemnas left her.
Her sternum cracks and she screams, blood spattering from her mouth as she does.Ā Her head falls back, eyes staring up and up and at nothing at all.Ā His hand leaves her shoulder, the pain too cacophonous to fight against; no need to hold her down like this.Ā It joins his other where it digs through her opened chest.Ā She feels ribs cracking, organs shifting.Ā Like Xemnas reprogramming her.Ā Like Xemnas.
āW - Why āā ?ā she chokes out, tasting copper.
āSora needs this more than you do.ā
She manages to lift her head; to look over her collarbone and the gore of her opened body.Ā She catches a glimpse of him pale hands wrapped around her heart, lifting it from her body.Ā She screams.
She keeps screaming when he wakes her up.
She wakes like hands flying to her chest searching for blood and fractured bones and instead finding only the smooth expanse of the too - large shirt sheād borrowed.Ā She looks at him as he leans over where sheād rested, and his bleached face in the moonlight, and he is not smiling like he had been in the dream.Ā But she still shouts and pulls away from him, holding tight to her chest.Ā Protective.Ā Her eyes are wild and fever - bright.
āDonāt touch me!āĀ The shout is desperate and accompanied with tears ā she hadnāt been aware of them ā pouring down her cheeks.Ā She realizes, slowly, that it had been a dream.Ā Just a bad dream.Ā Just ā a bad dream āā
Her shoulders crumple, and she pulls her legs closer to her chest.Ā Thatās right.Ā She was staying with Riku because she needed to be in Destiny Islands.Ā His couch.Ā Not the empty expanse of her dream.Ā He is looking at her with tortured concern, aching for her sake, not smiling as her rips her body open.Ā Her heart races.Ā SHE IS AFRAID OF HIM.
She whispers,Ā āS - Sorry.ā
Heās silent; body tense as though he isnāt sure if he should leave her be or stay with her.Ā She isnāt sure, either.Ā Her eyes lower to her knees.Ā Finally, he asks,Ā ābad dream?ā
Her silence must be answer enough.Ā He sighs, and she looks down at her knees.
She says, āItāsā¦not your fault.Ā I have nightmares about everybody.āĀ Itās not as mollifying as sheād expected it to be; if anything, it seems to make him sadder.Ā He sighs, a low, unhappy sound.
āDo youā¦want me to go?ā He asks finally.Ā She doesnāt know.Ā But her head shakes.
āI donāt want to be alone,ā she whispers, and that is true.Ā Ā āCould you stay with meā¦just for a little while?ā
She feels the couch shift beneath her and looks up to see Riku sitting down.Ā Ā āYeah, Xion.Ā Of course.āĀ She watches him, half - grateful and half - terrified.Ā Imagines his fingers covered in her blood and then tries not to.Ā Itās not fair to him.Ā Itās not fair that she canāt trust; itās selfish and ugly that the world taught her to be afraid of the world and everything in it.Ā ITāS HER FAULT, NOT HIS.Ā Ā āAnd ā Iām sorry.ā
She nods.Ā Ā āMe, too.ā