#forcedaffection

Excerpt from the piece on @wearyourvoice: "To keep it simple, forcing your kids to kiss and hug relatives or friends makes it harder for them to understand and practice consent. It normalizes ideas that no doesn’t mean no and silences their abilities to stand up for themselves in uncomfortable situations. On the longer timeline, it reinforces the tenants of rape culture. . What you learn as a child continues to influence you as an adult. We don’t age out of the teachings of our youth, we just continue to live by them unless we are able to do the work to unlearn them. When you tell children that they must consent to giving affection, even if they don’t want to in order to avoid being seen as rude, you are telling them that their bodily autonomy is less important than upsetting someone else.” . When I think about this - my wife and I have never really practiced this “forced affection". We do however force them to acknowledge family because to not say “Hello” is a bit rude. . There are a number of articles around this topic publish coincidentally around the same time these past #holidays. Not sure why this is in the universals lexicon right now but it’s pertinent as ever. . Support independent media by people of color. . #forcedaffection #rapeculture #indeendentmedia #blacklivesmatter #translivesmatter #womensrights #wefight #weresist #wewillwin #outfittingtherevolution #deconstructtheconstruct #blackonblackbk #itslifeordeathforus #intersectionality #civilrights #humanrights #equality #equalityforall no #racism, #sexism, #classism, #ableism, #homophobia, #transphobia, #xenophobia #alliesandchampions #notagame #resistance (at Brooklyn, New York) https://www.instagram.com/p/BsjL44Ulkr0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=18tmjfbefk5pq

#forcedaffection Implies That You (Or Adults in General) Have the Right to Touch Your Child How They Want, When They Want ••The best I can do is to arm my children with the words and maneuvers to take full possession of themselves physically and emotionally.  This cycle ends here.  Be healthy.  Respect boundaries, yours and others.  Have courage little dudes.  You have this 100%. You are mentally,spiritually, and emotionally stronger than THIS.  I have faith that you will be strengthened by THIS and that you will grow into young men who do not force yourselves onto others or stand by while others endure boundary violation.  There is no wholesome authority that asserts that boundary violation is acceptable or necessary.  Though there will be those with status and authority who will use their position to do just that.  You will recognize them and you will know in your bones, how to proceed.  If you lose people in your lives because you do not bend to their will, they are not your people.  If you lose people because you do not yeld to them to meet their physical need for touch, they need help and you need space.