#fool's diary

I don’t know. Should I? I’m told I’m very cold. Am I?

They say they’re trying to help me. But the pain I go through makes it seem like they’re lying... What should do? Who should I listen to? The voices...they tell me I don’t deserve happiness.

That there’s no sleep for the wicked. But have I been wicked? What have I done to deserve this? Nothing...nothing...nothing.

I’m so tired. But I can’t sleep. I want some help. But there’s no one.

I can scream, shout, yell. But nothing I say can tell. The unspeakable pain. Of this game.

There is no help  There is no hope There is no resolution Only the unstated urge to end this.

my bf: drying himself on a towel in front of me, after a shower  / letting me dry his face after he has washed it before bed

my bf: turning off an alarm and starting to snore again a few seconds later

yesterday i bought two new monchhichis, one of them is wearing the cutest little strawberry suit. when they arrive in the mail i’ll have four in total, which means i can finally start to call it a collection i think.